What should I do if I am blushing and shy when talking to others?

Miss Yang: Hello! I am introverted, I always blush when talking to others, others blush when talking to me, and I blush when meeting strangers. I have no temper. I feel uncomfortable and shy in crowded places. What should I do with this character? Can I change it? People say I am introverted. -Xiao Chun Xiao Chun: Hello! I think it's defensive psychology and shyness. The so-called defensive psychology is: the defensive psychology generated when getting along with others. For example, I feel that I don't have my own space, or I am worried about whether my belongings are safe, or I am always afraid of being laughed at by others. Moderate defensive psychology plays a positive role in interpersonal communication, which can help you distinguish the authenticity, advantages and disadvantages, and prevent people with ulterior motives from taking advantage of it. Therefore, we advocate remembering in the social process: "You can't have the heart to hurt others, but you can't have the heart to guard against others"; However, excessive defensive psychology will have a negative effect in the social process, making people around you psychologically far away from you, thus hindering normal interpersonal communication. Therefore, it is difficult to adapt to society without any precautions in communication. However, we must also firmly believe that, after all, good people account for the vast majority in society. As long as we treat others with trust, respect and love, we believe that others will treat us in the same way. In the process of communicating with others, don't think too much about what to say and what not to say, but naturally state your thoughts along the topic of the person you communicate with. About shyness, shy people restrict their words and deeds too much and can't fully express their thoughts and feelings. Almost everyone is shy sometimes, which is more common among teenagers who have just fallen in love or just stepped into society. It is normal for a person to be a little shy, as long as it does not affect normal communication. If you are shy at any time and on any occasion, but you don't want to associate with others, you dare not associate with others. This is a bad personality performance and needs to be overcome and changed. So how can we change our defensive mentality and shyness? Give you some advice: 1. Evaluate yourself correctly and build up confidence. In daily study and life, you should think more about what I should do; In various social occasions, you should naturally express yourself and don't worry about whether others pay attention to you. When talking to the other person, keep your eyes on the other person all the time, and pay attention to the other person's eyes, which can increase your attention to the other person and reduce the other person's attention to yourself. 2. Look for opportunities to exercise yourself. Don't miss any opportunity to speak, such as greeting people who often meet but don't talk much, such as postman and salesman; When you associate with strangers and feel that you have a topic of interest, express your views boldly and positively, regardless of what others think. Meet an outsider 3, often chat with friends, and pay attention to conversation skills. Besides work and life, you can also talk to her about some interesting stories, jokes and humor. Long-term persistence will not only change your self-image and self-concept, but also improve your interpersonal skills. 4. Have a good attitude, love life and cultivate various interests. If you want to sing, sing with your voice. If you want to joke, just open your heart and make a joke. In your spare time, you can also participate in sports and entertainment activities with friends, such as playing ball games and games, which is an excellent means for you to exercise your vitality and communicate. Don't worry about the pause in continuous speech, because pause is a normal phenomenon in conversation. When you feel blushing in conversation, don't try to hide it with some actions, which will make your face redder and further increase your shyness. Thinking of shyness is not equal to failure, it is only because of mental stress, not being unable to cope with social activities. 5. Be good at relaxing your nervousness. Using some calm and relaxed sentences and self-suggestion can often relieve tension and psychological burden; Always have confidence in yourself, and encourage yourself with inner language from time to time: "I am great", "I performed well" and "everyone likes me very much". 6. Learn to control your worries. Try to look on the bright side of things, look on the positive side. Usually pay attention to cultivate their own good emotions and emotions. I believe that most people treat themselves with trust and sincerity. Don't put yourself in an imaginary environment of distrust and insincerity. In that case, you will always be wary of others, and occasionally you will miss, or you will not miss, for fear that others will see through. This will make you panic and more shy. People can change many things in their personality through willpower, and overcome bad psychology such as indecision, nervousness and timidity. Some famous actors, speakers and teachers were shy when they were young, but later they were able to speak freely in public, that is, they realized that nothing could be achieved unless they overcame shyness, which was not the unique advantage of elite. Be prepared in advance and be happy when answering questions; Memorize the content of the speech, and you will be eloquent when you speak; Speak loudly at the beginning and hit the floor at the end. In addition to these "strategies" and "skills", it is more important to cultivate your own abilities in all aspects. Only when you have the ability can you have confidence and overcome inferiority and shyness. 7. Get into the habit of talking loudly. People who are depressed and timid have obviously low voices and lack self-confidence. Pay attention to raising the volume and get into the habit of speaking loudly. The explanation of scientific comparative experiment is that speaking loudly can relieve depression-it can mobilize all potential, including those suppressed potential, and at the same time, speaking loudly can expand your courage. 8. Don't think about who you are talking to, don't be cautious, worry and be too serious, and don't think ahead. Just open your mouth and say what you want to say, whether they can understand your own language or not, and whether others accept it or not. Just say it. This is an effective way to overcome tension and anxiety. Therefore, when communicating with others, as long as you are communicating with others, don't hesitate to say whatever you want, so that you will have the opportunity to show your talents and elegant demeanor, and you will take the initiative, which will of course reduce or alleviate your tension and anxiety. 9. When you feel nervous, anxious or afraid when communicating with others, tell them your nervousness, anxiety and fear and ask them to understand. When you speak out your nervousness, anxiety and fear, naturally your nervousness and fear will be reduced. These are just some of my opinions and suggestions. Your friend Yang Yonglong looks forward to your criticism and reference.