Funny narcissistic sentences

Part 1 of humorous narcissistic statements

1. The day I am gone, China will seem to have lost its soul.

2. I am young, everyone loves me, flowers bloom, and cars have flat tires! ! ! Every time I walk on the street, either handsome guys turn around or beautiful girls jump off the building!

3. It doesn’t matter who your yesterday belonged to, as long as today belongs to me.

4. You should find someone who can make you laugh, not someone like me who can make you cry.

5. I have a good-looking appearance, delicate features, and a celebrity style. I am one of the first batch to pass the international ISO9001 Handsome Boy System Certification. A small reminder; this signed beauty is worth paying attention to.

6. Everyone says that making friends with beautiful people will make you look better. No wonder you find that your friends around you are getting better and better looking.

7. Today a girl complimented me on how thin I am, and I slapped her right away. Didn’t you see how handsome I am? !

8. It’s annoying to be woken up by my own handsomeness every day!

9. That’s how I am, destined to be different from you. Thank you for not appreciating it. My style is limited edition.

10. Being a handsome person is very tiring, I really understand this.

11. I just want to be a quiet beautiful girl, but I can’t be quiet with my stunning appearance.

12. Narcissistic sentences - someone said I wasn’t handsome, it was definitely an accident.

13. Always imitated and never surpassed, it will be you, the lost sheep, who will never get past the Flame Mountain.

14. Love comes when people see each other, flowers bloom when flowers bloom, cars see cars. So I don’t dare to go out for fear of injuring others.

15. This user is too handsome and is prohibited from setting a personal profile.

16. After meeting me, you will suddenly realize - it turns out that being handsome can be so specific!

17. Am I superfluous? In fact, I am not superfluous. There is only one me in the world, how can I be redundant? That is called the only one.

18. Your world is not just about you anymore, you have to know that you also have me.

19. Before you get close to me, you have to think clearly, I am nothing but handsome.

20.Ah~~You don’t know me? I am an artist! I have been an artist for more than a week... Humorous Narcissistic Sentences Part 2

21. Am I so radiant that I make you talk nonsense?

22. I just miss you suddenly, can't help it, and feel painful.

23. Weigh yourself every time. When you lose weight, say to yourself: Lose weight. When it gets heavier, say to yourself: Your breasts are big.

24. People fish in front of my house all year round, and they never come back empty-handed. The most interesting thing is that our home is still a hundred kilometers away from the sea, but they often catch tuna in the small smelly ditch in front of the door and find turtle eggs behind the haystacks. Later, after investigation, it turned out that it was because countless women cried in front of my house all year round. The tears are rich in amino acids and proteins, which are very suitable for the survival of tuna and the laying of eggs by sea turtles. Over the years, the tears of those women gathered into a small beach. By the time I was fifteen, the beach was prosperous; by the time I was eighteen, this beach had developed very rapidly, so it was called: Hawaii.

25. When we, Lao Tzu, will we become an empty cicada shell, hanging on the branches of the years, facing the dusk with our mouths open, but forgetting to sing.

26. Young people, you must study hard and don’t eat and drink just on a handsome face like me.

27. Every time I see myself in the mirror, I will curse, how can there be such a beautiful person in this world.

28. I am not in the city center, so please don’t hang around me!

29. Thanks to me being a thin person, I can count my ribs when I feel sad.

A collection of the latest classic stories in 2021.

30. The lovely me back then is long gone, replaced by a more lovely me.

31. Ask yourselves, if you were someone else, would you be willing to date yourself?

32. Last time a girl asked me, how many beautiful girls have you chased in your life? ? I told her there was no one, and a friend of mine next to me told the truth to the girl. Usually pretty girls chase him, and the girl fainted at that time.

33. It is always too easy to trust others, so I am willing to be deceived.

34. Childish words are unbridled. What comes out of the mouth is a statement without thinking. It outlines the self that is full of loopholes but sincere and affectionate. It is a super narcissistic sentence. If you are jealous, don’t give up. If you are envious, please continue.

35. Life is a mobile person, death is a mobile soul, is it impossible for me to use China Unicom to die?

36. You are always alienated by ordinary people because you are too handsome, you Look, even if you post something, no one will read it.

37. Don’t just click on the video when you come up. Do you think your TV will show up if you click on it? If you have anything to do, come to me. If you have nothing to do, come to me.

38. When a woman no longer urges you to go home late at night, she has been disappointed in you.

39. When you want to give up, think about why you persist until now.

40. Every beautiful and pure love on campus has been ruined in the name of puppy love. Funny and humorous sentences

1. Hi! Did you receive my text message? Why are you still in a daze? Just smile, okay? You have a nice smile.

2. Asking you how much sorrow you can have is like a shot of snow beer.

3. It is better to be fat and exquisite than to be thin and the same.

4. The boy I once loved had the most handsome back in the world.

5. There are only three days in life. Those who live in yesterday are confused; those who live in tomorrow are waiting; those who live in today are the most practical.

6. Why don’t you find a quiet place and count your brain cells by yourself?

7. Everyone should love animals because they are delicious.

8. My heart is not a bus. It is not a place where you can sit down whenever there is space.

9. It is virtue for a woman to have no talent. I must be too wicked.

10. I bury corn in the soil in spring, and I will harvest a lot of corn in autumn. In the spring I bury my wife in the soil, and in the fall I will... be shot!

11. Whoever’s husband is a fucking temporary worker.

12. Do you know what a big shot is? Just a little guy who keeps working hard.

13. The hair is gone and the dandruff is more prominent.

14. Medicine cannot cure fake illnesses, but wine cannot cure real sorrows.

15. In the quiet night, secretly thinking about you alone has become my most secret happiness. I dreamed of you several times, and I was so greedy that I didn’t want to get out of bed. I indulged myself in possessing your tenderness as much as I wanted.

16. I am now trying to make money to buy a plane ticket for 20xx.

17. An ideal world = free phone calls and free Internet access.

18. Death is not scary. What is scary is that you dare not die.

19. It’s not that I was careless, but that I did it on purpose!

20. What you do is called diving, but what I do is called lurking.

21. If two people are together for a long time, it is also romantic to stare at each other.

22. When you feel depressed, take the landlord’s toothbrush and brush the toilet.

23. The road to success is always under construction.

24. Knowing that you are not doing well makes me feel at ease.

25. The boss burst into tears when he came to the bowl.

26. Sorry, the signature is too personal and the system cannot display it. Please refresh.

27. Do you think you are beautiful just because others call you Youlemei? Do you know that Youlemei is a disposable product?

28. I am not RMB, how can I make everyone like me? !

29. Life is like a journey, you may end up overturning somewhere.

30. Don’t charge me, because I have caller ID here.

31. I miss you so much every day... I am happy and worry-free with you. I am really infatuated with you. I worry about you. I have also been sad and heartbroken. I don’t dare to change my heart. Don’t be too suspicious. I am very happy to write this. Don't worry, I'm most afraid that you are unintentional.

32. When will the bright moon come? Ask the blue sky for wine... Qingtian said: Fuck you, I am so busy, I don’t have time to care about you, just watch the weather forecast.

33. Why do you have more nonsense than Hunan Satellite TV’s advertisements!

34. The most useless thing in the world is the salary slip. If you look at it, you will get angry and wipe your butt too thinly.

35. Beheading is nothing. The scar on my head is no bigger than a bowl. 18 years later I will be a zombie again.

36. I sincerely want to make money as my hobby.

37. My ears are not trash cans. Don’t throw everything here.

38. A gentleman is nothing more than a patient wolf.

39. Mermaid, I love you. Only you will not cheat.

40. I want the whole world to know that I am very low-key.

41. Exposing half of your butt does not mean you are sexy. It only means that you bought too small underwear.

42. Someone’s goal: to kill three Zhuge Liangs with one cobbler.

43. Eat all your health and use up your health, gamble and whore all your energy and you will die.

44. If we don’t love enough in this life, we will be able to live long in the next life.

45. I never bully the weak - I didn’t know he was weaker than me before I bullied him...

46. Money is not everything, sometimes a credit card is needed.

47. Is it the sun or the moon in the sky? Sorry, I am not a local!

48. In the long journey of life, there will always be a few wrong steps.

49. I have been suffering from insomnia recently and wake up every 16 hours.

50. The mind is a daily necessities, not decorations.

51. For men, having breasts is a mother. For women, money means a man.

52. Count the stars with me. If your IQ is low, just count the moon.

53. The sign of an immature man is that he can make heroic sacrifices for his ideals, while the sign of a mature man is that he can live a humble life for his ideals.

54. The most common thing a thick-skinned person says is: I will treat you well.

55. I also want to be an elegant lady. It was life that forced me to become a shrew.

56. Cucumbers are about shooting, life is about having fun.

57. I want to become as thin as a bolt of lightning and light up all the obscene fat people.

58. Change signatures every day. It doesn’t cost any money anyway.

59. The reason for refusing to confess is often that we are not from the same world and are not suitable. Am I from Mars? Not suitable for people on earth?

60. Reading your message quietly, the warmth slowly grows, pervading and tolerating me for a long time. Thank you for letting me accompany you. Thank you for giving me tender care.

61. I chase you with Cupid’s arrows and fly with you wearing a bulletproof vest.

62. Cutting wires with a kitchen knife, sparks and lightning along the way.

63. Everyone says I am ugly, but in fact I am just not obviously beautiful.

64. Your smile is brighter than that piece of shit under the sun.

65. Looking at your photos, I was so excited that I wanted to make them black and white and hang them on the wall!

66. Don’t be nervous, I’m not a good person... Talk about narcissism, funny and special narcissism

1. Love is not as good as narcissism, love life, love Self

2. The external manifestation of selfishness is to love to say that others are selfish

3. Everyone will be hurt on the road to growth. We have just set sail and must learn to be strong

4. You don’t care about me now. Remembered. You won’t be able to reach me in the future.

5. Hey. Why haven’t I seen anyone handsomer than me yet?

6. You are handsome and lawless, and I am ugly to a new level.

7. Dear self, don’t hold on to the memories. A kite with a broken string can only be allowed to fly. If you let it go, you will let yourself go; Dear self, you must find something other than the kite. Apart from love, there is something that can make you stand firmly on the earth with both feet; Dear self, you must be confident and even narcissistic, and always remind yourself that I deserve the best.

8. If you are jealous, don’t give up. If you are envious, please continue. The weather is nice today and it is a good day to go out and express your handsomeness.

9. What do you like about me that I can change?

10. Never talk to your wife about your ex-girlfriend. Saying you are not angry is a lie!

11. Some people are alive, but they are already dead. Some people are alive, and he should have died long ago!

12. Walking on a confused road, watching the time go by, but not seeing the sun rising.

13. The difference between you and me is probably when we are playing hide-and-seek , I will worry if I can’t find you, and if you can’t find me, you will go home.

14. Crying when it really hurts. Not too much emotion. Instead, he left a drop of bitter tears with an expressionless face.

15. I hope that when the countdown reaches zero, the Monkey King shouts, “Here comes my grandson.”

16. Good-looking people take photos as profile pictures, while ugly people can only be used as emoticons.

17. Don’t think that just because I am handsome, I am unattainable and unattainable. In fact, I am open to all kinds of people.

18. The light rail says not to carry flammable and explosive materials. Someone decisively got out of the car because he was so ugly.

19. Don’t expect to meet the right person, just hope that you will meet all the right people.

20. Question: What are the common characteristics of narcissistic people? (Frequently updating Facebook? Constantly seeking attention from others?) Extremely narcissistic people have some common characteristics. Characteristics, such as always talking about oneself, exaggerating one's achievements, but lacking empathy and care for others, and showing oneself exaggeratedly in public situations, such as being naked, showing off muscles, or being inappropriate on the Internet. Keep talking about "self".

21. For yourself, be cherished but not narcissistic; for others, be demanding but not demanding; for feelings, be dedicated but not infatuated; for life, appreciate but not sigh; for achievements, desire but not Extravagant hopes; for family, attachment but not obsession; for friendship, longing but not yearning; for money, hope but not greed; for wealth, sharing but not exclusive; for faith, righteous faith but not superstition; for life, no regrets but No regrets.

22. Narcissistic people are cute. Because they are narcissistic, they understand love better.

23. Every good person has a period of silence. During that time, I put in a lot of effort, endured isolation and loneliness, and did not complain or complain. When I talk about it in the future, even I can be moved.

24. It’s not my fault that I’m handsome. It’s your fault that you like me.

25. I am neither good nor bad. I am not outstanding. I just dare to be different.

26. Don’t be obsessed with me, he is just a legend.

27. A conversation between a man and a woman. Man: I have someone I like. Woman: She must be very beautiful.

Man: Why are you so narcissistic?

28. If one day, I become no longer so innocent, please remember, it is not that I have become bad, but that I have been hurt by bad people

29. I am walking freely Between self-reflection and narcissism

30. My progress impressed him and he became blind from then on.

31. It is said that ugly people should study more. No wonder my mother said that I was not good at studying since I was a child.

32. Question: Do you think narcissism will be a growing problem in the 21st century?

33. The sun in winter is clearly the light in the refrigerator. .

34. Walk along a red line, stop at a red line, and not even a leaf among thousands of flowers touches you.

35. Please God give me a brain that can understand mathematics, physics and chemistry. I would exchange it for the beauty of my deskmate.

36. Even my exam questions came out like this:

37. People need faces, trees need bark, and telephone poles need cement.

38. In winter, I get up from bed, do exercises in the morning, and turn off the water after taking a shower. They are called the three most desperate moments in life.

39. Those who pretend to be mean should be beaten, not allowed to get used to!

40. God created you because of his creativity, and it is your courage that you can live in this world.

41. His space problem is who I love the most. I narcissistically typed my name, but the answer was wrong.

42. Every day I keep setting a new world record, that is---I hold the record of being the most handsome in the world.

43. The jade tree beats Pan An in the wind, and a pear blossom crushes the begonia.

44. Thinking that others say bad things about you is out of jealousy

45. Secret love is a kind of politeness, narcissism is a kind of pride, open love is a style, not falling in love It's a taste.

46. One star falls, but it cannot dim the brightness of the starry sky; one flower fades, and the whole spring cannot be barren.

47. The world is always the same, but our moods and experiences are different.

48. Question: Can narcissistic personality be "cured"?

49. Finally, the court announced the ruling: It is not your fault that you are handsome; It's your fault if it's so fascinating. Ah, because I was handsome, I was sentenced to 10 years. It’s so unreasonable.

50. You said you loved me and I was happy all day long. If one day you say you don’t love me anymore, maybe I will be sad for the rest of my life!

51. I am in the late stage of narcissistic cancer and there is no cure.

52. There is a kind of desolation that this math problem has exceeded the scope of my Chinese understanding.

53. A person’s longest love history is probably narcissism.

54. That’s how I am, destined to be different from you. Thank you for your disappreciation, my The style is limited edition.

55. I particularly admire those real men who are indifferent to other girls but stalk their own wives.

56. Just like the raindrops that wash away the mountains, the ants that swallow the tigers, and the stars that illuminate the earth and the slaves that build the pyramids, I will build my own castle brick by brick.

57. Question: If you are in a relationship with a narcissist and feel deeply frustrated, what should you do?

58. I have a handsome appearance, beautiful features, and a beautiful tree. She has a celebrity style and is one of the first batch to pass the international ISO9001 Handsome Boy System certification. Tips; this signature beauty is worth paying attention to.

59. You said that my appearance was fake, and you also said that the money I gave you was also fake. I tell you that I can tolerate that the money you said is fake, but I cannot tolerate you saying that there is something wrong with my appearance.

60. When you meet me, you will find that there is someone so handsome!

61. Question: What damage will narcissistic behavior bring to work?

62. A kind of game, a kind of rule. If you can afford it, continue; if you can't afford it, get out.

63. The happiest person is the happiest person. People who smile often are the happiest.

64. It is said that after playing Weibo for a long time, your words will become like this. My dear, you are cheating me. Do you have your sister? My dear, you are not good at being a fujoshi! I’m so fucked, go ahead. Shit! Dear, you are so patient, you liar! Dear, Lao Shi is so horny, I will strangle him! Dear, what’s wrong with the otaku, the otaku can’t afford to hurt me, you know! I’m so jealous! I hate you, you are laughing so hard!

65. The road ahead is still long, you may cry, but you must keep going, definitely!

66. Every time the chemistry teacher When doing experiments. I silently chanted one word in my heart: Explode!

67. There is a kind of crash called wrong password input. There is a kind of panic called account login from a different place. There is a kind of emotion called invisibility. There is a kind of misunderstanding called being offline. There is a kind of loss called you don’t have access rights.

68. No one urges me to sleep, no one says good night to me.

69. In my next life, I will definitely be a man and marry a good woman like me!

70. I am not very strong and I have never had the habit of showing weakness.

71. I choose to give up on you because I love you deeply. In love, I lost.

72. Children’s words are unbridled. What comes out of the mouth is a narration without thinking, and it outlines the self that is full of loopholes but is sincere and sincere. Say narcissistic sentences about others.

73. Don’t just click on the video when you come up. Do you think your TV will show up if you click on it? If you have anything to do, come to me. If you have nothing to do, come to me.

74. Question: Will narcissistic behavior be detrimental to intimate relationships?

75. Passing by is fate, staying is destiny. For yourself, be cherished but not narcissistic; for others, be demanding but not demanding; for feelings, be devoted but not infatuated; for life, appreciate but not sigh; for achievements, be eager but not extravagant; for family, be attached but not infatuated ; For friendship, yearn for but not yearn for it; for money, hope but don't covet it; for life, have no regrets but don't regret it; for life, love but don't dote on it.

76. Hey, why haven’t I seen anyone more handsome than me yet?

77. Five hundred years ago, you alone leveled the Heavenly Palace, and now 1.4 billion people do it for you. Ping CCTV.

78. The last time a girl asked me, how many pretty girls have you chased after you when you were so old? I told her none. A friend of mine next to me told the truth to the girl. It was usually the pretty girls who chased him. , the girl fainted at that time.

79. Well-intentioned good night but no warm reply

80. In order to gain recognition and attention, children become performative.

81. The party needs me to be handsome, and I have to be handsome. The task of catching up with the United States and surpassing the United Kingdom is very arduous. I want to contribute my appearance to the construction of the four modernizations of the motherland and the development and progress of the old areas.

82. Dear self, today is your birthday. Happy birthday. Be confident and even narcissistic. Always remind yourself that I deserve the best.

83. The longest relationship I have ever been in was narcissism. I love myself and have no rival in love. ---Anthony

84. When you are sad. I wish I could be by your side. Do your best to make you laugh.

85. When I paid the phone bill, I realized how valuable my words were.

86. I love entering my own space, not because I am narcissistic, but because I want to see what your latest updates are.

87. I have grown up, learned to smile, learned to be strong, and learned not to shed tears for anyone.

88. The advantage of having a flat chest is that the distance between two people’s hearts is closer when they embrace each other.

89. Man: I like a girl. Woman: She must be very beautiful. Man: You are too narcissistic.

90. Narcissism means being a man in the next life and marrying the person you want. Such a wife for me!

91. Learn to be a strong woman, not pretentious, not pretentious, not cowardly, and live as proudly as you want.

92. The longest relationship I have ever been in was narcissism. I love myself and have no rival in love.

93. I like women who are deeply grateful and travel far alone. I know to thank my parents, but not blindly follow them; I know to thank the world, but not to be narcissistic; I know to thank my friends, but not to rely on them; I know to thank every seed and every breeze, but I also know to get up early to sow seeds and walk in the wind. ---Bi Shumin "The Woman I Like"

94. Answer: It is no longer useful, it is gone now

95. A certain man is so handsome that he alarms the local area, and the local report The Central Committee, the Central Committee urgently consulted and awarded the most handsome medal!

96. The 10 major realms of life ① Towards yourself, cherish yourself but not to be narcissistic; ② Towards others, be demanding but not demanding; ③ Towards feelings, be affectionate but not infatuated; ④ Towards life, be enlightened but not infatuated Sigh; ⑤ For achievements, desire but not extravagant expectations; ⑥ For family, attachment but not infatuation; ⑦ For friendship, long for but not yearning for it; ⑧ For money, hope but not attempt; ⑨ For wealth, share but not exclusive; ⑩ Regarding life, I have no regrets but no regrets.

97. If you are jealous, don’t give up. If you are envious, please continue.

98. Life is like making a phone call. Either you hang up first or I hang up first. Say narcissistic sentences about others.

99. The perfect boyfriend: handsome, rich, generous, temperamental, well-educated, does not flirt with others, does not drink, does not smoke, does not cheat, does not exist

100. Don’t force me. 10. I don’t want to say that I am handsome because I don’t want to say the same thing to people all over the world! Funny narcissism talk

1. I want people all over the world to be You know, I'm very low-key

2. When I heard the teacher said that he was going to start fines again, I knew that he had spent all his salary

3. The revolution must still succeed if comrades have not worked hard.

4. People who are too rational will definitely miss the opportunity to go astray and the beautiful scenery brought by their mistakes along the way.

5. Knowing that you are not doing well makes me feel at ease.

6. The farthest distance in the world is not between life and death, but that I am invisible, you are online, you are online, but I am invisible.

7. Others say that I am very thin, but I am not obviously fat.

8. The person who will marry me in the future: I don’t know who you are dating now. .

9. I am single and proud, and I produce rubber for my motherland. I am single, I am shameful, I am wasting paper for the country.

10. I am a bachelor, I am shameful, I am a waste of paper for the country.

11. You are calm because you are not afraid. I am calmer than you because I am not afraid of your death.

12. My wife said: Compare which of these two fish is handsome, the handsome one will be tomorrow’s dish.

13. Those who always say that others are pretending, you are not even pretending.

14. The most painful thing in the world is not the separation between life and death, but the exam is about to take place. Others are reviewing and I am preparing for the exam.

15. Your smile is better than that dog in the sun Shit is still brilliant

16. If two people are together for a long time, it is romantic to stare at each other.

17. My love for you is as vigorous as a tractor climbing a hillside

18. You are not the traffic policeman in my head and have no right to interfere with my direction

19. The wind is rustling and the water is cold. A strong man beats a dog and it is gone forever

20. Most of the people kissing in the park are not couples. Most of the people who have a strong relationship are deliberately shown on the scene that most of them are not friends. .

21. Oh my God, I have to wake up to how handsome I am every day.

22. Life is like rape. Since you can’t get rid of it, you might as well enjoy it.

23. If I win five million, I think I’d better donate it to my own account.

24. Behind a successful man there is always a woman, and behind a rich woman there is always a...

25. Don’t say I am arrogant, it’s just that I refuse to be with Dealing with animals!

26. My sister never speaks human language, what she always talks about is mythology.

27. You are my Yulemei, so I can throw you away after drinking.

28. Sorry, the user you dialed is married.

29. If I can forgive your vulgarity, can you tolerate my pretense?

30. Secret love is a successful pantomime, but speaking out becomes a tragedy!

31. Don’t argue with a fool, otherwise others will not be able to figure out who the fool is.

32. It doesn’t matter if your head is empty, the key is not to get wet.

33. Protect yourself, love others, and please don’t come out in the middle of the night to scare people.

34. Others laugh at me for being too lewd, but I laugh at others for not being open-minded.

35. Chopin, if you can bring out the sadness of labor and management, labor and management will give you one dollar.

36. There are thousands of men in the world, and it is impossible to change them every day.

37. Even if you already have an owner, I will still take over.

38. The most useless thing in the world is your salary slip. If you look at it, you will get angry. It is too thin to wipe your butt.

39. The days of growing up, pain and happiness are called youth.

40. There are many things that are somewhere between not being aggrieved and being hypocritical.

41. In this world, sincerity is scarce, so we should be frugal.

42. The road is long and long, so it’s better for me to fight;

43. Women are like clothes, but sister has a temperament that you can’t wear.

44. Reality rapes the past, and the evil left behind is called memories

45. I said I was the director, and she slept with me. The next day, I said I was a cartoon director and she cried.

46. Listening to you speak, a sense of intellectual superiority arises spontaneously!

47. I am not the Mona Lisa, and I will not smile at everyone.

48. I liked you when you were plump, but why are you so thin now? I feel so embarrassed. Oh, my wallet!

49. I have been obsessed with you for a long time, and I am a bit narcissistic!

50. How should I put it, there are still a few people who have a crush on me, and I know it well