Lazy sugar gourd script

A: Qi B: Candied gourd A: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests and friends! New Year's Day is coming, I wish you all a happy New Year and all the best! As we all know, in the past 30 years of reform and opening up, the people have been trying their best to strive for a well-off life. Therefore, to achieve a well-off life, efforts are the foundation. Speaking of hard work, I want to introduce a very, very lazy and surprisingly lazy person to all the friends here. I wonder if you want to meet him? Do you want to? Ok, I'll invite him up. Hey, Sugar-Coated Berry, come on, come on. . . This is what I want to introduce to you. Say hello to my friend. B: Good! A: How about that? Are you lazy? Don't say a word. B: Tired! What did you do? B: Yes. A: I'm in a hurry. What will you buy in the future? B: Wine. Yes, drink some wine to relieve fatigue. After drinking? B: Drunk. If you drink too much of this stuff, you won't. . . B: Sleep. Have you finished sleeping? B: Drunk. Are you drunk? B: Sleep. Have you finished sleeping? -Drunk! ! I know that's all you said. If you keep jumping out word by word, I'll bah. . . B: It's illegal to hit people. A: It's four words this time. I said you were drunk and slept all day, so what did you eat? Pancakes My mother gave it to the stall. A: Well, such a big person depends on your mother. I am her son. How old is your mother? My mother is very young. She is not yet 100 years old. A: (Less than 100 years old). Ninety-four Then who cares about your children? Project Hope. A: He saved trouble. Who cares about your wife? Her husband. Her husband? I'm fucking hungry. Well, remarried. Look at you. Look at others. Everyone is hardworking and rich. Don't you look greedy? B: am I greedy? What are you greedy for? Don't say far, just say your second uncle. This does not mean that people are so old. In addition to busy farm work in the field, people also opened a small clothing store, and now the income is yes. . . B: (Interrupting) Is there anything delicious? I hate exposing him. A: What's the matter? Once I expose him, the government will have to deal with him. A: I said, what law did he break? The government wants to deal with him? He sells fakes. Is it? A: Selling fakes? B: The label of the trousers he sells clearly says that they are made in Shenzhen, but he says they are made in the special zone. A: What a pity. B: Huh? Remember, Shenzhen is a special zone. Who are you kidding? Why would I lie to you? B: You don't know anything. A: Who doesn't understand? People laugh at you. You are a fool. What is a special zone? Let me ask you something. B: Better than Daqu is Tequ. You lied to me. A: I'm still thinking about drinking. Okay, okay, don't mention him. Besides, my second brother, my friends, my second brother is now making friends with foreign countries, introducing foreign advanced technology and establishing a cattle station. Forget about him. A: This cow. . (Interrupting) What's the matter? B: Crabs. A: Teeth? Your second brother is a gangster. A: Why are all the hooligans out? Did your second brother do it? A: Breeding station. B: Listen, listen. A: Ang？ B: breeding! Breeding. Anyway, even if we don't catch him, even if he misses the net. Old rascal. And mentioned him. Okay, okay, forget about him. Tell me, my friend, we used to be in the same village. I took the first step and contracted a barren hill bell fruit tree. Now I have made great progress. Can I compete with you? His grandfather only married three wives, while mine only married two. Can I compete with you? A: What you said is a thing of the past. We mean now. B: I quit now. I'm doing some work. My, uh, your grandfather doesn't count. I will marry at least four. Oh, there are four more? B: That is, the government won't allow it, that is, A: I mean, if you work harder, you will be better than now. B: You said CCTV didn't want me. What am I doing? A: Let me see. Who dares to want you with your lazy appearance? What am I doing? A: You won't use the poverty alleviation money given to you by the village to develop production, will you? I sell food. A: What about the relief food given to you by the village? I changed my drink. What about those angora rabbits I gave you? B: I'm a dining table. A: When? . . ? You ate? Hey, can I drink without eating? That's for you. Are you funny? I don't even have time to raise a wife. Do I still have time to raise rabbits? Let me ask you something. You said you didn't have time. What have you been up to all day? What are you up to? I have to go to my mother's house for dinner. A: Even if you go to your mother's house for dinner, you still have time. What did you do? B: It's time to get down to business. What did you do? B: I'm going to the North Wall to bask in the sun and ask something. Let me ask, why does Wang always bring water to widow Li? They call it helping others. As soon as Zhang Yuhua got married, she cried for children. Why hasn't there been any movement for three years? Do you care? A: The village chief and the women's director are together all day, but they are not separated at night. Why? Why on earth is this? Oh? Why on earth is this? Well, why do you think it is? A: Because they are a couple. B: Bah. . . A: Come here. Did you brush your teeth? A: Look at all the friends in the back. How poor do you think you are? What's the point of people like you living? What do you say? What's the point of people like you living? What do you mean? What do you mean? My wife ran away with someone else, my children have to work, and people in their forties have to rely on my mother to support them. A: You have to think about it. I really need to think about it. Why do people buy cars? B: Why can't my family afford balloons? Why do people watch TV? B: I can't afford a light bulb at home. Why do people travel with their wives? Why do people take my wife when they travel? A: Still. (Applause) Do you know what this is about? B: What's the matter? A: Because you are lazy. B: Lazy! Otherwise, you would have made a fortune. A: We'll change it when you figure it out. B: How can I change it? Answer: To learn technology, you must first major in fruit trees. Take advantage of natural conditions. B: to be an expert on fruit trees. A: Ah. That's what I thought! I got that guy ready that day, and when I got that guy ready, I borrowed another donkey. Tie it to my kang. I said, why did you borrow a donkey? B: As long as it summons me to get better. Oh, it's an alarm clock B: Tie it up and call the donkey. I'll cover the grass and go to bed immediately. A: Early to bed and early to rise. I got up before dawn. A: It's early enough. B: I get up and go up the hill. I contracted fruit trees when I went up the mountain. In less than two years, the fruit was abundant, I could eat and drink, I had money, and I built a small building. A: Great. That's a terrible thing. A: What's wrong with it? B: Except from Changping, Beijing, all the older girls around me came to inquire about me. A: Isn't that a good thing? This isn't it? B: OK, OK, it's all crowded into the house. A: Isn't that better? B: This says I like you, that says I love you, and this says I marry you. A: How beautiful. Who are you going to marry? Why don't you marry me? Get out! Oh, he is also a cow. Hey. . . B: It's all blown out. A: It's all blown out. B: There's one left. I also left an eye. B: She looks like Zhou Tao, the hostess. A: Oh, it's beautiful. B: When the girl saw that no one was there, she bent down and threw herself into my arms. Oh, hey. B: Sing a love song while arching? B: (Barking like a donkey) A: What's that noise? The donkey chewed the grass. A: dreaming!