A collection of 98 funny quotes from Love Apartment

1. Yu Mo: We just need these two ashtrays. How do you know we don’t smoke at all? Zeng Xiaoxian: These are a pair of cups. I picked them specially for you two. Don’t you think she looks very unique? Youyou: You want to say that we are incompetent.

2. Zi Qiao: Don’t be lazy with me, I’m too lazy to compete with you!

3. Zhang Wei: What I bet with you is not based on what you want, but on what I have.

4. Yifei: She may need to keep a spare tire. ?

5. Yifei: Yes, yes, you are basically on the same level as the soot in Taishang Laojun’s alchemy furnace!

6. Guan Gu’s magic: We are both women, but why are the differences so big between us as human beings?

7. Sekiya: I am from the hometown of Ultraman. ?

8. Guan Gu (singing): Giant Dragon, you are two years short, two years short forever.

9. Meijia: My aunt came to see me in advance. My waist is very sore and my stomach is uncomfortable.

10. Yifei: Zhanbo and I used to be conjoined twins. Before we were two years old, our brains were still the same!

11. Guangu (surprised): Ah! It's so sinful. Doesn't his uncle have any objection to Yang Guo doing this?

12. Zhanbo: I want a treasure map. Give me a map, ah? Is this a world map? ?

13. Zhan Bo: Sister, if someone hurts you deeply, how long will it take for you to forgive him?

14. Uncle policeman: Who called 110? ?Sekiya: ?I ordered takeout. ?

15. Yoyo: It’s my fault. I like dramas too much, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to choose one. Later I thought that I couldn't hang myself from one tree, so I hung ropes from both trees.

16. Zi Qiao: "Yes, from now on the children will always ask why my mother's man is not my father."

17. Guan Gu: ? Wait a minute, it's freezing rain in Antarctica. What happened to the polar bear? ?

18. Xiaoxian: As we all know, Comrade Hu Yifei is a strange flower among the many residents of our love apartment. With her unique personality charm, she has monopolized many records in the apartment over the years, including : The most unreasonable. Likes to be nosy. The highest academic qualifications. The loudest voice. Also? The most capable.

19. Zhanbo: Sister, have you ever raised a dog?

20. Zhanbo: Sister, didn’t you say that the early bird catches the worm? ?

21. Youyou: It’s long anyway, definitely longer than Teacher Zeng and Ziqiao, and Zhang Wei’s is the shortest.

22. Zhan Bo: Sister, if someone hurts you deeply, how can you forgive him? ?

23. Zi Qiao: Your eyes are clear and moving, your hands are gentle and delicate, and your heart is crystal clear.

24. Zi Qiao: I also want to find a place where I can print my face on currency.

25. Zhanbo: Uh. To be precise, there is no such person as an uncle

26. Yifei: If you use your standards, Wanyu is basically on the same level as the Monkey King.

27. Meijia: Wait a minute, let’s talk first, who is Wu? ?

28. Yifei: ?Two prodigies, they are violent chicken popcorn. ?

29. Xiaoxian: Yes, then the doctor made a quick move of the knife and gave Zhan Bo his brain.

30. Zhan Bo: That’s it, Xiao Longnu. That's his aunt.

31. Yifei: The problem is that there is a notice posted downstairs that the price of pork around the world has increased. You want me to go to Mars to buy pork? ?

32. Zhanbo: "If there are monsters, then there is Ultraman."

33. Child: ?You treat me as my child. ?

34. Guangu: Oh my God! That Yang Guo. He became his own uncle! Little Dragon Girl. Became her own niece-in-law!

35. Zi Qiao: I am a born actor. My eyes have become round since I was a child when I saw a beautiful girl. ?

36. Yifei: ?I found out that I was wrong. The early bug was eaten by the bird. "

37. Meijia: It's not difficult. Can't you just find a place to print money?

38. Xiaobo: I have been divorced for three years, and my son is Already half a year old.

39. Zi Qiao: Mr. Guan, we have been friends for so many years, you have to help me this time. If you can protect me from this difficulty, I, Lu Xiaobu, swear that I will never Never, ever, ever, ever? No more going to Kaixin.com.

40. Zi Qiao said to Zhan Bo: Why do I feel that if you sit here, birds will fly away from thousands of mountains and all traces of people will disappear? ?

41. Zhan Bo said: ?Don’t lie to me. (In my heart, the Autobot cannot fly after turning into a car)?

42. Meijia: Your arms are powerful, your chest is broad and stalwart, and your skin is invulnerable.

43. Zi Qiao: Ten thousand and one million are the same, because I don’t have either!

44. Zi Qiao: That was when I was in high school. One day I dreamed that I was taking an exam. Then I suddenly woke up. Something even worse happened. It turned out that I was really taking an exam. Taking exam! ?

45. Yu Mo: Although a man who buys you a diamond ring may not be trustworthy, a man who refuses to even buy you a diamond ring must be unreliable.

46. Zi Qiao: The goal is one word: fool him, get him, scare her. ?

47. Zhanbo: ?Oh, when did the name change? ?

48. Zi Qiao: ?Dad will sell refrigerators to Eskimos, auction tennis balls to Federer, and sell wheelchairs to football players. ?

49. Zhan Bo (describing his sister intoxicatedly): ?People use eight words to describe her: as quiet as a virgin, as active as a mad rabbit. ?

50. Children collecting donations for animal protection: ?It’s freezing rain in Antarctica, and polar bears are freezing to death. ?

51. Zhang Wei: Failure is indeed common, but I have never won! I thought Mo Lan was the person I was looking for, but she actually thought I was not a rich second generation.

52. Yifei: Tell everyone what you are unhappy about to make everyone happy.

53. Meijia: Mr. Zeng, did you install a toilet in the kitchen or a stove in the toilet? ?

54. Yifei said to Zhanbo: "Your mother must have thrown away the person when she gave birth to you and raised the placenta." ?

55. Guangu: ?How do I know? I've never caught a wild Ultraman. ?

56. Guangu: It’s so touching. Xiao Longnu is so beautiful. But Yang Guo didn't know how to cherish it. He only had his aunt in his heart!

57. Meijia: Look at your big face. Every time I stand next to you, my mobile phone has no signal. I can’t even see the sun when I walk on the road!

58. Yoyo: The answer is correct. There is something magical about Guan Gu that is longer than all the boys here. What is it? Yifei: Give me some tips!

59. Zi Qiao: If you don’t listen to the old man, you will die in front of me. ?

60. Wan Yu: Have you passed the GRE?

61. Zi Qiao: This appointment was originally to find a spare tire. Now she has found Guan Gu. Then am I not the spare tire of the spare tire? ?

62. Guan Gu (singing): I am not a locust, I am not a centipede, I only want my mean brother and perfect love.

63. Yifei: Forget about writing poetry, the writing is nonsense, smelly and long. As a result, when the girl saw it, her female hormones were finally stimulated. It turns into cholesterol.

64. Yifei: Humph, just continue on your mediocre life path. My students will never let me down, they will trample your wretched outlook on life with a hearty victory.

65. Yifei: Well, referred to as the second child. ?

66. Wanyu: ?I put the car on the window sill to collect the essence of the sun and the moon. Maybe it flew back to the planet Cybertron. ?

67. Guangu: Meijia, your aunt is so kind to you. How about she sleep in my room and I sleep on the sofa today.

68. Yifei: Just go with that one.

What was the name of the old man who locked Monkey Sun in the alchemy furnace?

69. Guangu: Oh, does Meijia have many aunts? Your grandma is really good at giving birth. I only have one, but I have three aunts!

70. Yifei: Oh, it’s God’s business to forgive him. My mission is to send him to see God! ?

71. Psychologist: ?What is the most important dream you have ever had? ?

72. Yoyo: Do ??you know what the greatest pain in life is? It's a secret sitting next to you, but you don't know. Yoyo: Do ??you know what is the greatest pain in life? It's that you already know the secret, but you can't tell it.

73. Zhanbo: I want a **chicken popcorn. ?

74. Yifei: Did your mother throw away the person when she gave birth to you and raise the placenta?

75. Yifei: I really want to rub my size 37 shoes onto your size 42 face now! Plant people can talk better than you. Believe it or not, I will plant you in a flower pot right now!

76. Yifei: It doesn’t matter, failure is success.

77. Zhang Wei: It’s a twist of fate that my right eyelid kept twitching when I went to the toilet, but I saw you right after flushing the toilet.

78. Zhang Wei: These three sentences have little to do with us. (Pointing to himself) I am a poor man, (Pointing to Lu Ziqiao) He is a thief, (Pointing to Zeng Xiaoxian) You are a weakling.

79. Yifei: No, but. I raised you. I have raised many animals before, including birds, rabbits, fish, squirrels, and money trees, all within three days. They are all dead, Zhanbo, you are so lucky!

80. Wanyu: Hello, give me five pieces of chicken popcorn. ?

81. Zi Qiao: ?Your eyes are clear and moving, your hands are gentle and delicate, and your heart is crystal clear. ?

82. Meijia: ?Your arms are powerful, your chest is broad and majestic, and your skin is invulnerable. ?

83. Artest: ?No, the fighting skills of football players in this country are much better than their foot skills. ?

84. Yifei: "Now that we have children, it will save us a lot of trouble!"

85. Zi Qiao: Is your head squeezed by the door? You dinosaur that regresses three times a day!

86. Zhanbo: I have had many mothers, but none of them are pregnant.

87. Guan Gu: I have only heard of hosts scolding the audience. This is the first time I heard the audience scold the host.

88. Zeng Xiaoxian: Hello everyone, I am your new Xiaoxian, friend Zeng.

89. Wan Yu: Guan Gu, the aunt you are talking about is not the same thing as what she is talking about.

90. Child: (sarcastic at Sekiya’s ignorance) You’re not from Ultraman’s hometown, are you? ?

91. Sekiya: I know you know that others don’t know that you know, but I have seen your performance before, so you should know that I know that you know.

92. Zi Qiao: Let’s split it 50-50. ?

93. Yifei: ?Teacher Zeng, what are you unhappy about? Say it to make everyone happy. ?

94. Wanyu: Dog biscuits are rich in hair conditioner and anti-dandruff formula. After eating them, your hair will be gone and your dandruff will be better!

95. Yifei: Forgive him? Forgiving him is a matter for God, and my task is to send him to see God!

96. Zi Qiao: That was when I was in high school. One day I dreamed that I was taking an exam. Then I suddenly woke up. Something even more exciting happened. It turned out that I was really taking an exam. take an exam!

97. Wanyu: Ugly, but very ugly, just very ugly!

98. Zi Qiao: If your friends are playing Story Solitaire, be sure to participate and never walk away alone. Otherwise, you never know what disgusting role they might assign you.