Cai Kangyong: Don't be too enthusiastic. I suggest you be cold.

Many times, what makes us tired is not life, but redundant enthusiasm.

I have read a heartfelt statement: how passionate life is at first, and how speechless it is later.

Once the enthusiastic person cools down, others will say that you are not close to him, while the cold person will not.

Cai Kangyong mentioned in the interview: I encourage everyone to be a calm person. Being too enthusiastic is not a way for a person to maintain a good relationship.

In an unfamiliar situation, the more enthusiastic, the more tired.

In the variety show "Seven Ba Shuo", Huang Zhizhong made it clear that dinner was his least favorite.

Obviously, some people I don't know well, but I have to bite the bullet and chat with them;

Obviously, I have nothing in common with him, but I have to go looking for trouble to make myself look cold;

Pretend to be intimate when you obviously don't like someone;

Between the flowers, the night passed like this. Did you get any useful information? Actually, no.

Whether it's a class reunion we haven't seen for more than ten years or a reunion dinner at work, we just praise and brag about each other, how much money we have earned from promotion and salary increase or business, how good the other half of our children are, and so on.

Do you think the purpose of the party is to establish effective contact? Real socializing is a professional discussion between capable people, and dinner is far from socializing.

If you are naturally good-natured, you will usually see everyone smiling. When you are in a bad mood and don't like to talk, people will deliberately blame you, "What's wrong with you today? Usually not good. "

Those activities you don't want to go to need to gain others' recognition for fear of offending others. In order to be more suitable for other people's "good people", you would rather force yourself to cater to them than be accused of being unsociable.

After all, in the eyes of the public, "sexual apathy" is the embodiment of unsociable.

But even if you have participated in countless activities and met many people, they are just an extra contact in your address book. Who comes to you for help, you are always welcome, for fear that others will say you are stingy, but if you are needed, people may not help you.

Be careful not to fall into other people's mouths; You are smiling, but you make yourself tired.

People who care too much about other people's feelings and are too "enthusiastic" are often ignored by others.

The harder you try to please, the less valuable you are.

In fact, there is no need for anyone to squeeze into a crowd that does not belong to us and listen to the noise of others and play an unimportant role; Instead, keep your happiness and love, and you will feel much more relaxed.

A friendship between gentlemen is as light as water, and the friendship that can really blend into the bones is by no means spoken.

20 1 1 May, Gao was arrested for drunk driving, which coincided with the propaganda stage of his film "Da Wusheng".

In prison, Gao called Han Han: The film premiered in Shanghai, can you give a performance?

On the day of the premiere, Han Han had a racing car in Shandong. After the premiere, he went straight to the Shanghai premiere. Before he could slap himself in the face, he went on stage to help Gao publicize. "Xiao Song is not here. Let's help him with this."

Later, when talking about Gao on the show, he said:

In fact, I called several other wrists in Shanghai at that time, only Han Han went, and Han Han was the least sociable among several people.

He said with emotion that only after such an experience in life can you see your heart clearly.

Those who often talk about friendship are likely to be popular.

Xiao Zhang's mother just left the hospital two days ago. He sent a message, thanking my friends in the Jianghu for their help and thanking me for having this opportunity to see my troubles.

Xiao Zhang has a good family and is enthusiastic. Every time at dinner, his brother patted him on the shoulder and said, you are so kind to our friends, you should make this friendship. Tell me directly if you have any difficulties in the future.

Only a few months later, her mother was diagnosed with cancer. In order to treat her, he used up all his savings, still 65,438+10,000.

He went to those buddies and heard that he borrowed money. It's not that his cell phone is busy elsewhere. At the beginning, he vowed that it was "difficult to find him" and told him that it was not that I didn't help you and was short of money recently. ...

Most of his heart is cold, like a cold wind swishing straight into the bones.

Unexpectedly, in the end, an alumnus he didn't contact often asked him for an account without saying anything, and gave him the money on the same day.

Don't look at how others treat you when you are proud or dull; It depends on how you are down and out and how others treat you.

The trough in life is not a bad thing, but a good thing. Can help you detect a bunch of rubbish, my friend.

People who usually call each other brothers are likely to run away at a critical moment; On the contrary, those who are difficult to get along with are cold and say nothing to pull you off the cliff.

Friendship in the world is uncertain and unpredictable; You don't have to be enthusiastic about everyone, not everyone deserves your sincerity.

Real mature people know not to entangle with rotten people, and avoid three points when they see scum.

Some people are too impatient to spit on anyone. It wasn't long before they were spread to the leaders by a willing heart and realized that it was too late to make a big mistake.

Some people talk without thinking, don't know how to respect others, and just touch the pain of others. Even if they hurt you unintentionally, they won't help you in the future.

Others are emotional, so when something happens, they listen to other people's slanders, argue with the National People's Congress, turn potential allies into enemies, and the villains take advantage. Such people are too impetuous and lack insight.

....

"Caigen Tan" has a cloud: "Look at people with cold eyes and listen to words with cold ears. Leng Qing should feel cold and new."

Don't make friends rashly, only by observing calmly can you know whether his personality is suitable for being your friend;

Don't judge too early, listen and think quietly, and wait until you understand the meaning of his words before you answer;

Don't rush to judge and reason calmly before giving reasonable suggestions, so as not to be abrupt.

No matter in which circle, people who know how to observe and control their emotions will win in the end.

Impatience can only be a bad thing, and calmness can succeed.

No matter how sad you are, don't complain, let others see your jokes; No matter how angry you are, you should restrain yourself from losing your temper and keep things from getting out of control.

As Bing Xin said, "A calm heart can build a deeper world under any circumstances."

When you have nothing to do, learn Zen to calm your mind before making a decision.

Zhou Zeng said: "The best state of life is abundance and tranquility. If any external activity has no spiritual value as its goal, then no matter how vigorous and colorful it is on the surface, it must be poor and empty in essence. "

There is a senior in the university who looks very cold. She never participates in any club activities or social activities. She always goes to class alone and to the library alone.

Until one time, I heard her chatting with a usually serious professor. The content is almost all about academic and professional issues. Although the process was controversial, they had the last laugh and agreed to play ball together.

A cold person has a natural aesthetic feeling and silent wisdom; Seemingly taciturn, the soul is particularly confident and rich.

Instead of enduring the emptiness after the excitement, it is better to socialize selectively, concentrate on yourself and enjoy enrichment and beauty in the cold and cheerless.

If life can be colder, we can live more soberly, have high-quality thinking, and not lose ourselves in prosperity.

Might as well stay away from the ups and downs of the outside world and find a corner of Tao Yuanming's pure land to meditate.

Author: Xiao Jing, after drinking the strongest wine, riding the strongest horse, seeing the prosperity of the world and stepping over the endless desert, I would like to light up your world with words.