How to find a topic when chatting with your mother-in-law?

A young mother asked me: "My mother-in-law helps take care of the children. It's very hard. I don't have any old friends here. I think I should talk to her more, but I just can't find a topic. I feel very tired." Embarrassed, don’t know what to do?”

Many young mothers face similar situations because they need the elderly to help take care of their children. Some feel embarrassed, some feel depressed, and the mother-in-law also thinks you have a straight face all day long. , do you dislike me? As time goes by, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law becomes increasingly tense.

However, you may be facing the dual pressure of having young children and being busy at work. Your mother-in-law is here to help. If you are asked to focus on finding topics, will it put an extra burden on you?

In this case, why do we still talk? Let's change the scene: You can assume that you have been working hard, but your boss keeps a straight face all day long and doesn't pay much attention to you. What will you do as time goes by? So if your boss often greets you in a pleasant manner, what is your work enthusiasm like?

In the same way, in order to recognize your mother-in-law's hard work and make her more happy to help you, it is not only worthwhile but also necessary for you to put some thought into chatting and adjusting the atmosphere.

Speaking of chatting, have you noticed that a common problem when chatting with your mother-in-law is that if you are not careful, the chat will either turn into a power struggle with hidden murderous intentions, or it will become a fancy complaint. , the result was that the two people broke up on bad terms.

Therefore, before chatting with your mother-in-law, you need to prepare and choose appropriate topics: which words can bring distance and which words are harmful and unhelpful. The basic principle is: to achieve these goals I should find a topic that is interesting to both parties, and at least avoid talking about something uncomfortable.

Finally, let’s talk about how to find topics:

Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law had relatively few interactions in life before. Some of them are from different regions, and their ideas and habits will be very different. So** *Where did the same topic come from?

1. Talk about things she is good at: For example, my mother-in-law, she knows a lot of local customs and she cooks delicious food. I like to ask her for advice. Not only did we chat about some things, but I also learned a lot. Interesting and useful stuff.

2. Talk about her past: When people reach this age, they have many stories. These conversations will bring back many memories for her. If someone is willing to listen to these seemingly insignificant memories, she will Feeling respected, I will understand her difficulties better. This not only deepens the relationship, but according to research: if the elderly talk more about things from their youth, she will also become younger and healthier.

3. Talk about the differences between the two parties. There are many differences that can be discussed: environmental changes between now and in the past, the differences in diet and daily life between your natal family and hers, the status of your current daughter-in-law and her daughter-in-law at that time. Differences, different ways of cooking the same dish, etc.

4. Talk about your husband: things about your husband’s childhood, your husband’s strengths, his current work status, etc. You can talk about anything except his shortcomings.

Chatting may seem simple, but whether it is a good conversation or not can make a world of difference. I hope this article can help you put some thought into winning mutual respect and family harmony!