A joke about homophones

1. The crab went out for a walk and accidentally hit the loach.

The loach is very angry: "Are you blind?"

The crab is very wronged: "no, I am a crab!" " "

2. In the driving school theory class today, the teacher said, "Anyone who causes a serious traffic accident to escape is forbidden to drive for life."

A girl in the back raised her hand and said, "Then I will never get married?"

My girlfriend's name is Zhu Jing. I took my girlfriend back to my hometown in the countryside for the first time. As soon as I came in, I said, Mom, Zhu Jing is here.

Mother listened and said: The pig came in and just drove it out!

4. On his deathbed, Grandpa called his young and ignorant grandson to the bed and said with his last breath, "Son, it's good to be an official in this world!" The little grandson is an obedient child, and he firmly remembers grandpa's words before his death. Many years later, he finally became the best coffin manufacturer in the village.

A woman came to a man's house to play, and the woman teased him and said, I will marry you if you have a piece of land. Then the doorbell rang, and the courier brother said, sir, there is a courier for you!

In Chinese class, Xiao Ming didn't listen carefully when the teacher was talking about text analysis. Suddenly, the teacher asked, "Xiao Ming, what does the article 1 to 2 say?" Xiao Ming was stunned and said, "The article made a clean break. Does it mean that he broke up with Ma Yili?"

7. Niu Niu and Da Zhuang are playing downstairs. Niu Niu suggested: "Let's play the star!" "Yes, yes!" "Just think of me as G.E.M.!" "ok!" In a moment of excitement, Da Zhuang pushed Niu Niu to the ground and rode up. Niu Niu was startled. She groaned and screamed, "Wang Dazhuang, I'm your father. Who the fuck told you to ride me as a stool!"

8. The bus I took arrived at the station that day, and the passengers got off in a column. Just as the door was about to close, a lady shouted outside. "I will die in your car! ''

I was so nervous that I closed the door immediately, stepped on the gas pedal and thought; "There are many strange people in this city. ''

Unexpectedly, the lady called a taxi to chase my bus and finally stopped.

The door opened and the lady shouted again; "Why don't you stop? I will die in your car! ''

I dare not ask her; "Young lady, what are you working hard for? ''

He angrily walked to a seat, then picked up a bunch of keys and said to me; "I will die in your [key] car! ''