The owners meet together to spank their children. This is the real life of raising a baby. I feel sorry for the last baby.

Text丨Fu Lin Mummy

According to legend, this is the "Eight Not Beat Poems" written by Zhu Shuzhen, a talented woman in the Song Dynasty, to save her father.

In the second part of "Huan Zhu Princess", Grandma Rong was ordered to be beaten by the emperor. Ziwei couldn't bear to plead for mercy, so she also used this poem about not beating, and successfully persuaded the emperor not to beat Mother Rong.

Poems are good poems and talented ones, but if used when parents want to spank their children, I’m afraid it won’t work.

Moreover, everyone has their own opinions on the issue of whether parents should spank their children when educating them, and no one can convince anyone.

One party believes that spanking children will leave a psychological shadow on the children and affect the parent-child relationship, and parents need to use other educational methods to educate their children.

The other side believes that in some cases, children must be spanked when they need to be spanked, and if they are not spanked, their memory will not be long.

For most parents, raising children is not a worry-free thing. There will always be times when the children are naughty and make trouble, and the reason does not make sense. If you don’t beat them, it’s just nice to say it. In real situations, it doesn’t matter. Can't fight. Those parents who do not spank or lose temper with their children only exist in parenting books and are not realistic at all.

Yesterday I saw a conversation in a group of property owners on the Internet. I thought this scene was very humorous, but also very real.

In the end, the owner said angrily and rationally: "If I don't give her a meal tonight, I feel like I've failed my ancestors."

I feel very sad when I see this. It’s funny, even though he was irritated by the child, he could also rationally evaluate the necessity of “beating the child”, and comprehensively considered the impact of spanking the child on the surrounding neighbors, and finally greeted the neighbors in advance with a calm tone in the group of property owners. , and apologized. After reading it, people felt that there was a high probability that this child had really done something extraordinary.

There is an even funnier scene. After the owner sent the message, other parents continued to say: "What time will the spanking be? I will spank my son too."

This building The children there were really miserable, but the last child was still miserable. I seemed to see the confused eyes of this little girl, "What did I do wrong?"

This calm, rational, and accustomed look , it doesn't look like the child is angry at all, but like "beating the child on a rainy day, it's just idle time."

Everyone was having such a calm and harmonious discussion with the children on their backs. Children in this building, do they know...

I didn’t expect that it would be like this now. The owners met together Beating children can reduce the psychological shadow area of ??the children.

However, if you think about the crazy scenes of homework tutoring on the Internet, you can understand these parents. After all, educating children is really too over the top.

Of course, I believe that the parents in the group may just be funny and humorous, and they still have a sense of propriety in dealing with their children, and they will not spank their children for no reason.

In that era, every household spanked their children. Every day in the corridor, you could hear the sounds of parents educating and chasing their children. When neighbors tried to break up the fight, they all said: "Old Zhang, It'll take a while."

At that time, it was normal for parents to spank their children, and children would not resent their parents for it.

However, Teacher Ma also said that there are conditions for parents to be able to spank their children. There must be no barrier between you and the child. Treating the child well is the basis, and then spank, so as not to leave a mark on the child. Psychological harm will not cause conflicts between parents and children because of this, because the child knows that the parent hitting him is for his own good.

In addition, parents also need to comfort their children after the spanking. They must have a clear conclusion to let the children know that it will be fine after the storm is over. They also need to tell the children where they went wrong.

The purpose of spanking children is to let them have boundaries in their minds and know when they can do things and what they cannot do.

Think more before making decisions in the future. Parents have their own set of rules of conduct. They don’t need to tell their children one by one, but show them to their children to let them know what to do in this situation. , what parents do.

The evaluation system of a child's parents is a kind of feedback on the child's behavior. If he does something right, he will be praised, if he does something wrong, he will be criticized.

Over time, a tacit understanding will be formed between parents and children. The children will know what kind of evaluation their behavior will be, and they will be educated by their parents.

So this kind of "spanking" is a bit like a scale between parents and children. One side is the child's behavior, and the other side is the feedback given by the parents. There are corresponding scales on both sides. Parents cannot act blindly. Otherwise, this measure will be lost, which is a weakening of one's own judicial power.

As a means of punishment, spanking children is not without merit. The child’s behavior may cross the line. If the punishment given by the parents is not severe enough, the child will lose his inner law. He will not be afraid of anything and will grow up. Dare to do anything. This is the dereliction of parental education.

There was a very popular video two days ago.

Fortunately, the child's father was nearby. Seeing that the situation was not good, as if he had a premonition, he quickly walked to the child's side and caught the child who was pushed down in time.

As for the kid who pushed, his father also ran from a distance, stepped forward and beat the kid.

Many netizens in the comments said that this father did the right thing. In this case, it is necessary to educate the children in such a strict way that cannot be questioned. There are certain things that must not be done. This is the best for the children. Responsible.

In short, when educating children, it is wrong to use spanking to solve everything, because there must be some situations where other methods of education are more appropriate. At the same time, it is necessary to hold back the reluctance in your heart and treat the child with a serious attitude when it is time to spank your child.