Super funny jokes about the Three Kingdoms.

One day, Liu Bei said to Mrs. Mi, "Can you tell me at the climax later?" Mrs Mi said, "But …" Liu Bei said, "But what?" Mrs Mi said, "I'm afraid ..." Liu Bei said, "Afraid of what?" Mrs. Meade said, "You said before that if I had sex with another man, you would kill me." Liu Bei: "$ #% ..."

2: Chicken ribs

On this day, Cao Cao and his new concubine were in the bedroom in after making love. The concubine was still unfinished and said, "Come again, come again." Cao Cao also wanted to, but his physical strength was exhausted, so he replied, "The chicken is tired." Just then, passing by Cao Cao's bedroom, thinking that Cao * was talking to him, he ran out to announce the code name "Chicken Rib" of this military operation. When Cao Cao learned this, he was furious and beheaded Yang Xiu.

3: tryst

One day, Wang Yun invited Dong Zhuo to drink at home. During the dinner, The Story Of Diu Sim, Yun3' s daughter, was in charge of pouring wine. Dong Zhuo and The Story Of Diu Sim are flirting, but they are eager for each other. When he left, The Story Of Diu Sim knocked on Dong Zhuo's head three times, and then left with his hand behind his back. In the middle of the night, Dong Zhuo entered from the back door of Wang Yungu's house and came to The Story Of Diu Sim's room. The door opened automatically. Dong Zhuo walked in the door for a while and saw two doors. It says "married" on one side and "unmarried" on the other. Dong Zhuo walked in through the "unmarried" door. After a short walk, there are two more doors at the end of the corridor, which say "experienced" and "inexperienced" Dong Zhuo walked on through the "inexperienced" door and came to the end of the corridor, where there were also two doors. It says "10 cm above" and "10 cm below". Dong Zhuo opened the door of "less than10cm" and went out to the road-

4. Magic prescription

After Mrs. Mi gave birth to Dou, she has been worrying about Dou's excrement all day. I'll ask Hua Tuo. Mrs. rice asked, "Dr. Hua, my peas have to shit n times a day." Is there a better way than using diapers? " Hua Tuo thought for a moment and replied, "Yes! You can raise a few dung beetles. "

5: Skiing

It is said that when Liu Bei, Guan Yu and Zhang Fei first came out to mix, they were once caught by their enemies and locked in a room. It was winter and it was snowing heavily. At night, when they sleep, they will huddle together to keep warm. The next day, three people woke up. Liu Bei, who sleeps on the left, said, "I dreamed that I was having sex." Guan Yu, who slept on the right, said, "I dreamed that I was having sex, too." Zhang Fei, who slept in the middle, said, "I dreamed that I was skiing!" " "

6: Fart

Zhuge Liang is a master of eight stunts, one of which is ventriloquism. It is said that Zhuge Liang discussed with Liu Bei in his account this day. Zhuge Liang suddenly wanted to fart, but he was afraid of being heard by Liu Bei. I'm really sorry. He had a brainwave and said, "Master, I call you like a woodpecker. How about adjusting the atmosphere?" Liu Bei nodded. Zhuge Liang barked twice in imitation of a woodpecker and took the opportunity to fart. Then he asked, "What's the matter, master? Do I learn like it? " Liu Bei said, "Learn it again. You farted too loudly just now. I didn't hear it. "

7: Sex.

In order to turn Dong Zhuo and Lu Bu against each other, The Story Of Diu Sim hooked up with them at the same time. On this day, Dong Zhuo was drinking with Lu Bu. Dong Zhuo said, "That's what The Story Of Diu Sim and I did the day before yesterday. She is really good in bed, much better than my wife. " Lu Bu said, "To tell you the truth, I had sex with The Story Of Diu Sim yesterday. Indeed, much better than your wife in bed! "

8: Everyone says so.

Said Liu Bei had a maid. On this day, Mrs. rice wanted to drive the maid away. The maid said angrily, "I know why you want to kick me out, because you are jealous that I am sexier and more beautiful than you!" " ""Who said that? " Mrs. Mi said. The maid said, "Liu Bei. You must still be jealous that I am better in bed! " "Who said that?" Mrs. Mi said. The maid said, "Liu Bei, Zhao Yun, Zhang Fei, Guan Yu … everyone says so! "