Fish joke

The real friends around you have little to do with your beauty or ugliness, or whether you have money or not. Below, I collected some jokes about fish for you. Let's learn humor and collect popularity!

Fish joke story 1 1, wife: "You used to send me a bunch of roses every day, but now you don't even send me one."

Husband: "After the fisherman catches a fish, should he continue to feed it?"

2. Sister: "The story of sinking fish and falling geese is that the stone is so beautiful that even the fish can't consciously compare with it, and they are ashamed to sink into the water ..."

Sister: "No wonder I can't catch fish every time."

9. "Hey, why did you pour the medicine into the lake?"

"I want to feed the fish some appetizers. The fish here have a bad appetite and don't eat the bait I made with sesame oil. "

3. "section chief, I sent you some fat and big carp."

"Oh, it's the company's rectification. I can't accept this fish."

"Then I'll give it to your wife!"

"I can't control this, she is a mass."

A mental patient fishes in an empty fish tank every day.

A nurse jokingly asked, "How many fish did you catch today?"

The mental patient jumped up and shouted, "What's the matter with you? Can't you see that the fish tank is empty? " ? "

5. "You see I am as strong as a bull, because I eat beef every day."

"Really, but I eat fish every day. Why can't I swim now? "

6. My classmate is plump and likes singing. He sang Richie Jen's song while washing clothes: "I am a fish ..."

I smiled: "How can there be such a fat fish?"

He said with a straight face, "haven't you seen dolphins?" ! "

7. One day, holding my daughter around the room, I suddenly went to the top of the fish tank and casually said, "If you don't listen, I'll throw you into the fish tank to feed the fish."

The daughter thought for a long time: "I have gained weight recently, and I will suffocate the fish."

8. Let's chat: Where there is water, there should be fish.

Lao Li: I don't think so. Is there any fish in the open bottle?

One night I slept with my husband, but I couldn't sleep, so I let my husband tell stories.

My husband just wants to sleep quickly and then tell me the story of mermaid.

One day, the mermaid fell in love with the prince on the shore, so she went to the witch.

The witch said that you can exchange your beautiful voice for a pair of beautiful legs, and the mermaid agreed for love.

I asked my husband in a hurry, and then what, then what?

The husband went on to say, and then the mermaid saw the prince and said to him, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. ...

Today is the weekend, according to the usual practice, people in the unit will get together to drink. Director Ma said that this is the best way to go deep into the grassroots and connect with the masses. Director Ma likes to eat fish, so he will naturally order this dish when ordering.

After three rounds of wine and five flavors of food, the fish was served. The waitress knew Director Ma and cleverly pointed the fish head at him when serving. Without waiting for everyone's advice, he drank three glasses of fish head wine nobly.

The director put down the glass and began to distribute the fish on the plate.

1. Fisheye-Look up-Deputy Director

Director Ma skillfully picked up the fisheye with chopsticks and distributed it to the left and right deputy directors. He called it "looking up" and hoped that the two of them would continue to cooperate with my work in the future.

The two deputy directors smiled and moved to say thank you, Director Ma. We will live up to your expectations and fully support your work.

2.bones- mainstay-treasurer

Director Ma picked out the fishbone and gave it to the finance section chief, saying it was called "the mainstay". You are the backbone of our bureau, and this naturally belongs to you. The finance section chief was flattered and said thank you, boss.

3. Fish mouth-as close as lips and teeth-cousin

Director Ma gave the fish mouth to "cousin", saying that it was "as close as lips and teeth". Director Ma's "cousin" gave him a long glad eye and said thank you, Brother Ma.

4. Fishtail-entrusts with an important task-director of the office

Director Ma gave the fish tail to the director of the office, saying that it was called "entrusting an important task". The director of the office said gratefully, thank you, boss.

4. Fish belly-heart-to-heart-director of planning department

Director Ma gave the fish belly to the director of the planning department, saying it was called "heart-to-heart". The director of the planning department bowed and said thank you.

5.fin- Director of Administration Department-Gao Fei.

Director Ma gave the fin to the director of the administration department, saying it was called "spreading your wings and flying high". You are the closest elite of our bureau, and you will definitely be promoted step by step. The director of the administrative department said with a smile, I still hope that the director will train more.

6. Fish Fat-You'll get a happy ending-Trade Union President

Secretary Ma gave the fish to the chairman of the trade union, saying that it was a blessing in disguise.

7. fish director

Finally, there was only a pile of fish left on the plate. Director Ma shook his head with a wry smile, sighed and said that I had to clean up this mess. Who let me be the director?

Fish joke story 4 1. One day, Zhang San was fishing by the river, and Li Si rode behind him. At this time, the fish took the bait. Zhang San excitedly pulled up the fishing rod and shouted "Fish" and ..................... "finally took the bait"! Li Si fell off his horse! He came up to me angrily and said loudly, "Why did you stop my horse?" Don't you know I'm in a hurry? "

2. "Brother, why doesn't the fish talk?"

"Idiot, can you talk in the water?"

The keeper of the zoo stood in front of the crocodile, opened his mouth and looked into the crocodile's mouth.

Passers-by tourists asked, "What happened to the crocodile?" The administrator said, "I don't know yet. After the doctor went to his mouth, he did not come out for half an hour. "

Xiaoming caught a fish by the river.

Xiao Ming said, "I want to eat you!" " "

The fish said, "No, can you let me go?"

Xiao Ming said, "Well, I'll test you a question, and I'll let you go if you get it right."

The fish said, "well, test me, test me, test me!" "

So Xiaoming grilled fish.

4. Anyang jokes, about fish and fishing rods

A monk asked an Anyang man, "Which do you choose, a fishing rod or a basket of fish?"

Answer: I want a basket of fish.

The monk shook his head and smiled: "The benefactor is superficial. It is better to teach people to fish than to teach them to fish. Do you understand this truth? The fish is gone after eating. A fishing rod can catch a lot of fish for a lifetime! "

Anyang people calmly and disdainfully added, "I want a basket of fish and then go to Jiefang Road vegetable market to sell it. I can buy some fishing rods and a pair of mahjong. Then rent the fishing rod to others, collect the rent, and then ask them to play mahjong while fishing by the White River to earn money for cigarettes and water ... "

Monk: "Amitabha ... I don't want to talk to you Anyang people because it's too powerful."

The fish said to the water: You can't see my tears.

The water said to the fish, I can see it because you are in my heart.

The pot said, "It's almost cooked, but I can't control my mouth."

6. Water said, "Let me hug you day and night and never leave you!"

The fish said, "Let me lie in your gentle arms and enjoy your care!" " "

The pot said, "Ya is almost ripe, and you are still so poor!" "

7. A little joke about fish. .........., this joke is a little cold?

The big fish miss eat small fish,

The little fish ran like hell,

Big fish are hard to catch,

The little fish shouted for help,

The big fish scolded: little thing, you are a fish, not a person, how can you call for help?

Small fish thought: Yes, how to shout?

therefore ...

..... stop yelling.

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