I am my observer.

The number of words is 3027

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"Staring at the boundless ocean or sky will make you realize how insignificant your problems are in front of the vast universe." -"adversity quotient"

Teacher Fan Deng explained this sentence. When she was bored, she stood on the overpass and looked at the cars coming and going under the bridge. Then she felt small and her heart gradually narrowed.

To put it another way, when you imagine yourself standing in a space overlooking all beings, it is natural to use a three-dimensional or even four-dimensional perspective to solve two-dimensional problems, enlarge your horizons and narrow the problems!

If we think in this way, it is easy for us to understand the grand vision of snowball v investment facing the world.

I once heard a lecture, the theme of which was "Parents' foresight determines their children's future". In the face of children's problems, you will find that the problems you are facing now are no longer so troublesome.

What if you let go of yourself and look at yourself from another angle or dimension? Will your own problems be solved?

The power of mindfulness gives us a good answer:

People are not saints, and bad emotions are inevitable. When bad emotions such as pain and anger strike, what we have to do is not to escape and resist, but to experience and take care of them. Take good care of your heart and feel at ease.

For a long time, I felt a bad mood of pain. If I had deeply understood ten years ago that sad emotions are as important as happy emotions, I wouldn't have been immersed in the pain of lovelorn for so long.

I can't face a new life, I don't want to look up at the blue sky, and I feel that I am shrouded in painful smog every day. Now I feel funny.

Life is like this, sweet and sour, spicy and salty, and both tastes are indispensable. Why is "sweet" the best?

My mother-in-law used to eat sugar when she was young, but now her teeth often hurt and she often needs to have her teeth pulled out and changed!

Studies have shown that eating a lot of sugar or carbohydrates will consume a lot of calcium, magnesium and sodium in the body, which will lead to osteoporosis.

In addition, research shows that people with high blood sugar levels have almost twice the risk of rectal cancer as normal people. Other studies have found that people with high blood sugar are more likely to develop liver cancer and breast cancer.

Sour food can nourish yin and moisten the lungs, and its astringent function is beneficial to the heart and muscles. Sour food helps to strengthen liver function.

As we all know, a certain amount of intake has the effects of anti-proliferation, anti-goiter and anti-convulsion.

The bitter taste of "good medicine tastes bitter and is good for disease" can tonify kidney, benefit bladder and stop bleeding; In addition, bitterness can also purge heart fire and eliminate phlegm.

Proper spicy taste can make the taste tense, stimulate appetite and promote the secretion of digestive juice.

Just like "sweet, sour, bitter, spicy and salty", there is no shortage of flavors, and emotions include joy, anger, sadness and fear, and they are indispensable.

When a person is uneasy, he only needs to pay attention to his own heart, and his heart will naturally be safe.

There are more than 20 definitions of emotion. Although they are different, they all admit that emotions are composed of the following four components:

1. Emotions involve changes in the body, and these changes are the manifestations of emotions.

2. Emotion is the preparatory stage of action, which may be related to actual behavior.

3. Emotion includes conscious experience.

4. Emotion contains cognitive components and involves the evaluation of external things.

First, the pain:

I remember when I was a child, every time I cried, my father would say, "Why are you crying? Don't cry! " When sadness, tension and anxiety are revealed, they will be stopped, and then slowly these negative emotions will be covered up and buried deeply.

A long time without showing, just like a soul that has taken off its shell, its body moves forward and its emotions can't keep up; Over time, this accumulation makes us feel heavy.

On the contrary, after every pain, pain, grievance and surprise, it will be easier to adjust emotions and integrate body and mind.

Big S said in a program that she would stay in the house for a month after falling out of love, which was very painful, but it was a feeling, just like happiness. After a while, I will devote myself to my work and let bygones be bygones.

After being lovelorn, she didn't refuse, but observed her mood in time and handled it in a way that suits her.

"It's like a desert hiking activity of Teacher Fan Deng. After walking more than 30 kilometers, I have to accept the stretching of the coach in the tent. Hearing the cry of killing pigs from the tent, everyone was afraid that they could not stand the pain of stretching.

Teacher Fan Deng told everyone that mindfulness should focus on pain, stare at the feeling of pain and take care of their emotions, and they will feel much better.

So, when it was Mr Fan Deng's turn, everyone came to see him. When he was stretched, he felt the feeling of soreness and pain, and his body did not rebound and resist strongly because he was taking care of his pain.

B, anger:

Not only pain, but also anger. When you have anger, learn to observe and pay attention to it, and you will find that your heart will gradually calm down.

Now I know why when couples quarrel, you and I will get more and more angry and angry.

If at the beginning of the quarrel, calm down and pay attention to yourself at that moment, care about and understand the current mood; Express your understanding of him and pay attention to the point where your emotions begin. After a while, I will feel a little relaxed, and then I will talk to each other. The effect is naturally no smoke.

C, fear:

I think "fear" also needs such care. Growing up, I was often awakened by a dream. Japanese spies shot into the village, and I ran away in a panic. I wake up every time I catch up.

Every time I say to myself, "It's a dream!"

Now think about it, if I don't immerse myself in this dream, I will pay attention to her as soon as possible and tell her that such a thing will not happen in modern times. Now the society is very peaceful, such a thing will not happen, but I accept your arrival and your dream of coming to me, but I hope you will not come in the future. You are not welcome here. Thank you!

Maybe with this attitude, she won't come to my world and bring me panic and frustration.

So now, if our child is afraid, scared, wronged and panicked ... we should not stop her from venting, let alone make a hullabaloo about.

Tell him what his mood is now and help him take care of his mood.

D, happy:

Laugh when you are happy. Think about how long it's been since you laughed.

Many people don't understand cold jokes or low-level jokes. They think it's funny, and people who laugh because of a common remark have no self-restraint.

Laugh loudly if you win after hard work; Laugh when you have fun with your friends; Humorous jokes may also help save lives when you are embarrassed.

Mr. Rihara, aged 105, was kidnapped by "Yunnan people" for one year. Although he was fighting to the death, an interesting thing happened.

Because it was the first hijacking in Japanese history, someone heard the word "hijacking" for the first time. A passenger asked the hijacker what "hijacking" meant.

The hijackers couldn't answer. Therefore, Mr. Nishihara said that as a hijacker, I don't even know what "hijacking" means. Is this good? The passengers laughed and the hijackers laughed together.

At that moment, the dignified atmosphere at the scene began to have a trace of warmth.

It was this experience that made Mr. Rihara feel strongly that he should always keep a sense of humor. Laughing together can bridge the gap between people and connect people closely.

Laughter is so powerful!

E. jealousy:

According to the dictionary of psychology, jealousy is a complex emotional state composed of shame, anger and resentment, which is caused by finding yourself inferior to others in talent, reputation, status or situation when comparing with others.

After research, although jealousy as an emotion is inaccurate, it does affect our lives.

As a kind of psychology, jealousy often manifests as "shame, anger and resentment".

In daily life, I can't help hearing people around me talk about who bought a car, who bought a house, who went on a trip, who showed love and who was admitted to Tsinghua. ......

People seem to enjoy this comparison and talk about it!

Some people feel pressure from it, and then catch up and try to lay a good foundation in their own fields;

Some people are disturbed by this information and keep repeating others' good looks instead of their own advantages. Day after day, they still look at other people's good looks and remain the same.

It is especially important to understand this emotion as soon as possible. For example, after my daughter finished her science class, other children came to me and said, "Aunt, do you think my kaleidoscope looks good?"

I said, "Wow! How beautiful! Great! What a creative kaleidoscope!

At this time, my daughter must take out the kaleidoscope that she just put in her bag and explain to me how wonderful her kaleidoscope is. Every step from color to production, she intends to tell me in detail at home. She must tell everything at the school gate and listen to my praise before going home!

I smiled in my heart. In fact, isn't this the simplest "jealousy"?

Next time we have a chance, we can have a good experience of this emotion!

Good nursing is also focusing on breathing. Sympathetic nerve and parasympathetic nerve alternate day and night, which helps us breathe spontaneously. Many emotions are between our breath and breath, so breathing is very important. When we have troubles, as long as we focus on the present breath, the feeling of troubles will be weakened a lot.

This is why psychologists ask visitors to take a deep breath!

That's why we need to take a deep breath when we are emotional!

Good care! Observe the mood! Pay attention to your mood! Peace of mind!