I angered my cheating husband and he directly asked me for a divorce. What should I do?

When I found out that my husband was cheating on me, my first reaction was anger.

After eight years of marriage, the children are already six years old, but he ruined the family by cheating.

I was impatient and couldn't calm down, so I gave him an embarrassing moment.

On that day, my parents-in-law came to visit my son, and the child was playing a small game with her husband's mobile phone. Somehow, he opened his WeChat, and a woman's voice came from the mobile phone, which was clearly heard by the whole room.

He hurriedly grabbed the mobile phone and yelled at the child. The child looked stupid and was scared to cry by his serious expression. His overreaction made me more convinced that he was cheating.

So, we had a big fight. In front of his parents, he felt that he had no position, a tough attitude and no shame at all. He also called me a bitch and didn't look like a woman.

that day, we quarreled for a long time. My father-in-law told my husband to shut up, and my mother-in-law took me to the bedroom and advised me not to be angry and calm down ...

My parents-in-law took him away for fear of scaring the child. It was an hour after they left that my husband changed his attitude and apologized to me for forgiveness. But how can I forgive him?

that night, I cried all night.

the next day, I inquired about Xiao San, and found that it was a female colleague in his unit. I went to his unit to tear Xiao San up, which made everyone know. Everyone saw his jokes with Xiao San, and that day, he lost all his face.

after venting my anger, I went home like a winner. He didn't go back and went to live with his in-laws for a week.

I ran over and asked him, how is this matter solved?

He calmly replied, divorced, and called me a bitch. I really look like a bitch! This day can't go on.

I was stunned. Divorce is no longer within my consideration. I just want him to know how angry I will be when he cheated on me. I won't easily bypass him, but I didn't expect to anger him and ask for a divorce directly.

I've always been aggressive, but now he's asking for a divorce. If I beg him in a low profile, doesn't that mean I'm timid? Teacher, please help me. How can I save my marriage?

The counselor thinks:

When a marriage is derailed, the injured party will feel that they have been denied in the marriage, resulting in anxiety and anger. Trust will collapse in an instant, and emotional collapse is inevitable, but we should also pay attention to the discretion.

When your partner has an affair, you should first face up to your marriage and rationally analyze which link went wrong.

The management of marriage depends on two people. Since there are problems, we should solve them head-on, instead of blindly treating ourselves as victims, just to vent our dissatisfaction and ignore the results we want.

It must be his fault that he cheated. This kind of behavior of accelerating the destruction of marriage is really hateful. When you are calm, you should consider whether you have neglected his feelings in this marriage relationship, which leads to his second thoughts.

You exposed him for cheating, causing his company to tear up his mistress. Such an aggressive behavior made him feel humiliated and his self-esteem was trampled under his feet.

If he doesn't mention the divorce, he seems to have no status. Therefore, when he makes an impulsive decision, he is usually just trying to save his only dignity, which is not necessarily true.

Therefore, you can't think that the marriage can't be redeemed just because of his unilateral decision. Besides, the fact that you try to salvage and reconcile doesn't mean that you are timid, but that you stand on the facade of maintaining the marriage and wake up a person with a confused mind.

You need to calm down and communicate with him to solve this cheating problem, instead of consuming in anger, intensifying conflicts and killing your feelings.

I suggest that you don't have any disputes with him now. Both of you should calm down, relax your attitude, reflect and criticize your excessive behavior, and then, calm down and talk with him about the damage that extramarital affairs have done to your marriage, the denial of your feelings for many years after divorce, and how much damage it has brought to your children.

Judge the next step through the change of his attitude.

If you give him a way out, he doesn't care about your kind persuasion, so you don't have to waste it with him, stop loss in time, protect your rights and property, and leave this irresponsible man.

On the other hand, if he is willing to reflect on himself and admit his mistake, you can help repair your traumatized marriage, rebuild your understanding of marriage, rebuild the trust between husband and wife and regain happiness through self-regulation or looking for emotional professionals.