A joke in a nutshell.

Stupid can be stupid, very stupid. Le coke, very happy. Stupid people in the world, people who are sensitive to laughter, people who enjoy coke in the world, stupid people in the world. Next, I have carefully prepared for you. Welcome to watch!

Hot articles

1. The firefly eyes caught by children are so cute ~ ~ ~ so cute. The children saw it and said, yes, it means there are still two squares! It is really two squares! ! !

Every time I encounter difficulties, I will take out my wallet and look at my wife's photo. Then say to yourself, "What's there to be afraid of? Don't lose heart, is there anything more difficult than her? "

The hardest thing this summer is the boys. Walking in the stairwell, looking up is a rogue, looking down is also a rogue ... walking on the road, a gust of wind blows, looking up is a rogue.

4. Two children are chatting. A: "Do you think there is anyone as unpredictable as Zhuge Liang?" B: "Why not! My mother is! " Really? B: "You still don't believe it? I took my report card home yesterday. My mother just glanced at the report card and said to me,' Be careful when Dad comes back and hits you.' Dad came home from work and gave me a good beating. "

In the cold winter, a buddy stood at the entrance of the building, wearing big shorts and slippers, looking at the snow all over the floor, and exclaimed in surprise, "* * *, when is winter?" ! "PS: only in this way can we be rated as" super otaku "

6. A scholar is going to have an exam, and he is worried day and night. His strange appearance makes his wife puzzled. She said, "Look at your cowardice. Is it more difficult for men to write articles than for women to have children? " The scholar sighed, "It is always easier for a woman to have a baby than to write an article!" The woman asked again, "Why?" The reader replied, "a woman can have a baby at any time, but my stomach is empty." How can I write an article? "

7. One day, the teacher asked in class, "Does anyone know how to exercise a good balance?" Xiao Ming proudly replied, "Two boats at the same time."

8. I got off the bus and saw the ticket posted on the roadside car. My mother calmly tore off a ticket from the Nissan next to me and posted it on our car, taking me into the supermarket! ! Ginger! And! Yes! Old! Yes! Spicy!

9. Xiaoli in the office is 29 years old and has nothing yet. Her colleagues were very worried about her and said, "Xiaoli, what kind of boyfriend are you looking for?" This is what my colleague's daughter in kindergarten heard. She suddenly ran to Xiaoli's side, flashing her big eyes and raising her head, saying, "Auntie, there are so many little boys in our kindergarten. Would you like to find one with me? "

10. Today, the company has a class to train new people. The content of the class is the relationship between people. When the lecturer plays ppt, there are many words in front. Speaking of "people should learn to be tolerant", there is nothing to say, so I put a picture: a photo of Nicholas Tse and Kansai. How many words can't compare with this damn thing?

Classic article

1. Legend has it that two countries that are enemies of China, one is rich in * * * and the other is rich in maids. ...

2. On the mountain, the shepherd boy is herding sheep; At the foot of the mountain, mother is weeding. The child rushed down the hill mischievously, shouting "Wolf is coming ……" When the mother ran to the top of the mountain like crazy with a hoe, the child smiled, "I lied to you!" After a while, the child did the same thing again and the mother was cheated again. When the mother was cheated to the top of the mountain for the third time, the child cried: "Mom, the book lied, and they said it would not work the third time ..."

3. "Mom, it's 12 o'clock. Why didn't you wake me up? " "Because I didn't buy you breakfast."

4. Graduation physical examination, a roommate just stood on the weighing scale, and another classmate winked at us, and everyone got the message, so all six feet stepped on the weighing scale ... The result was expected, and the nurse reported: 3 15kg! Everyone present laughed. . . This man is extremely puzzled: no, I only weighed 240 Jin last month and gained 70 Jin in a month.

Call my dad in the morning and say that you also gave my mom some gifts on Mother's Day. My father thought about it and said quietly, I think she should give me some gifts. She can't be a mother without me.

6. When you are angry, your mouth will rot, and it will hurt to spoil your wife! ! My wife lightly picked up Fu Shuo and tasted this!

7. My girlfriend asked me to buy a box of water for my mother at night. After I answered the phone, I immediately moved a box of ice dew and sent it there. Just now, my girlfriend called and was furious: "Ah, let you buy perfume and you buy a box of mineral water!" "

8. Q: Recently, Mr. Guo finally surpassed Aoi sora in the number of fans. How does Mr. Guo feel about this? Degang Guo: The bald man is finally naked!

9. Yesterday, a friend of mine said I had a big face. I said you have a big face. Do you want to compare it? She said it was better than how much, and I said, soak my face in the basin to see who overflowed. She said, no, just drink.

10. Brother: "Sister, when you get the money, it should be one of the happiest times in your life, right?" Me: "No, the first time I got the money, it was one of the happiest times in my life. Later, it decreased and I gradually lost my feeling." It's like touching the thigh of the same girl all the time. "brother:" . . . . . "Me:" Hey, my sister pawned it. . . "

Selected articles

1. It is said that the best gift for Mother's Day is a daughter-in-law or son-in-law. Are you ready?

Last semester, the class representative's surname was Xie. Next semester, the teacher changed the surname of the class representative to Chen. Therefore, students have a nickname called "metabolism"

3. The rich second generation is showing off their wealth: "This is my seventh sports car." There was a divine reply in the comment: "What is there to show off? Only seven more than me. . . "

When they fight the landlord, they will stand on the windowsill and shout three times that I am SB if they lose. After A loses, we can discuss whether we can cover our faces. B agrees, but shout in minutes. A promised to cover her face with a book, and after shouting three times on the windowsill naked, B said, take the book down, no one is there. A was shocked immediately after taking the book ... A saw a sea of people on the window of the opposite girl's dormitory ... hundreds of people downstairs were looking up ... The old headmaster was shaking all over ...

Although I'm actually not so good, this boiled water is still very good!

6. Customer: "This picture must be sent to me before going to work!" Designer: "OK!" Early the next morning. Customer: "Why haven't the pictures been sent yet?" Designer: "I haven't got off work yet ..."

7. My son finally saw the long-awaited sea. He said to his mother, "Mom, didn't you say that the sea is boundless?" Mom: "Yes." Son: "But how can we stand by the sea?"

8. The thief stole something and sang as he ran: "Running with the wind is the direction." The old man cried while chasing: "I cry and you don't look back." The police saw it and said, "I must be not good enough, so you have to run away." Finally, after the thief was caught, the judge said, "What do you have to say? How many tears are left to flow. " Thief: "Please give me a chance." Policeman: "This is the best punishment for impulsiveness."

9. A student is often late for school. The teacher invited his parents to ask why. His mother said, "Oh, I can't help it. This is inherited from birth. It's pitiful that he was born eight days later than the due date. "

10. At three o'clock, in the hot sun, the supervisor gave the order: "Cut!" Suddenly, the man sentenced to death burst out laughing! The supervisor asked, "What are you laughing at?" The condemned man hesitated for a moment and said, "The experts are right. A smile can prolong life by 5 seconds! " "