Joke Collection Website - Joke collection - A collection of different humorous jokes

A collection of different humorous jokes

1, American sociologist Irving with a big chest and no brain? Ms. Rothdale found that the fuller a woman's breasts are, the smarter she is after a comparative study of the relationship between breasts and IQ of 65,438+0,200 American women. The IQ of women with full breasts is about 10 points higher than that of ordinary women. Even those? Medium? Women are also better than? Flat chest? Among women, it is 3 to 4 percentage points higher. It is said that the average bust of women in China announced by the National Bureau of Statistics is 34B. Are you stalling?

Some people are alive, but they are dead. . . Some people die, and they don't want others to live! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Such as Newton, Leibniz and Lagrange.

Dreams, like classics, will never fade with time, but will be more precious. ? Old boys.

4. I get off work by subway with my girlfriend every day. I don't know when to start. There is always a handsome guy leaning against the sports car at the subway entrance to flirt with her. First, my girlfriend ignored me, but handsome guys and sports cars appeared on time every day. Gradually, her face was full of expectation and she became more and more cold to me. Until that day, the handsome boy asked her with a red rose? Leave him, okay? Are you sure? She was very excited. He turned to me? She doesn't love you anymore Would you like to be my boyfriend? I took the bouquet.

5. It costs 100 yuan to charge a mobile phone with a mop, which is a bit painful. Just call that buddy and ask if you can recharge it for me. As a result, the buddy was particularly depressed and said, brother, it's the end of the year, it's all bills. I finally stopped working, and you fucking charged me again!

6. The new four modernizations have finally been realized: feminization of men, pettiness of women, aristocratization of pets and illiteracy of aristocrats. . .

7. A university accepts students' questions:? Please describe the transition from a girl to a woman. ? There is a candidate who has got the three words: person, single, and eight. ? Comment: Great! ! !

8. Strong signature with different personalities 1. My first kiss is gone again? I have given you my phone number. Why don't you understand my mind? Charge me dozens of dollars if you have nothing to do. Being in this harmonious society, I feel very practical. Good people don't let go Are you afraid it will let the bad guys go? That man is so rude that he never talks to me in class. 5. The emperor claimed to be a widow. What should be the name of the three thousand beauties in the harem? Widow? . . .

9. The most beautiful things in the world 10: 1. First kiss; 2. watch the sunrise; 3. Hold hands with people you care about; 4. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside; 5. How I feel every time I see that person; 6. Stay up late at night and chat with roommates; 7. the expression of trust; 8. When you sleep, the sun shines on you; 9. Wake up and find that you can sleep for a few hours; 10. A warm bed in winter.

10, the whole semester was completely abandoned, and I was heartbroken when the exam approached. I haven't slept for a week. I was as busy as a bee before the exam. I collapsed when I walked into the examination room. I got the paper and cried. I didn't take the exam, and I don't know anything. . .

1 1, favorite dialogue:? You are so excellent that more and more people will like you, so how can I be liked by me? ?

12, what a pity! A girl quarreled with a male classmate at the school gate. She pointed at the other person's nose and shouted, Go find your 89-year-old lady! ?

13, a true friend, who doesn't send text messages on holidays and usually doesn't call to say hello. If anything happens, pick up the phone and say? Excuse me. You're welcome. You can come straight to the point. . .

14, men have lost their backbone and become more and more sissy; Women have lost their exquisiteness and become more and more jewels; Artists have lost their talents and become more and more insidious; Businessmen lost their kindness and became more and more angry; Scholars have lost their aura and become more and more pretentious; The rich have lost their righteousness and become more and more arrogant; The poor lost confidence and became more and more indignant. There is no fresh air between cities, and there is a lot of smoke. This is the current social atmosphere, which makes people breathless. . .

15, met two Frenchmen. One may be a teacher who teaches Chinese, and the other should be his student. The teacher happily pointed to the China calendar and said to the students, Look, these two words pronounce' Lei Feng'. This is Lei Feng Memorial Day. He is famous in China because he helped many people before his death. ) The student said admiringly, Ah, you are well informed! With that, they left happily. I leaned down and saw on the calendar: first frost.

16, never get up, never get tired of learning, never enter the student union, it doesn't matter at all; I often can't sleep at night, thinking about who is the best match, men and women are properly matched, and youth can't be wasted; Knowing that he didn't learn correctly, he also drank and partyed, stayed up until midnight, and often wiped his tears in class; That is, if you don't review at the end of the term, you won't be able to do anything in the exam, and you will drop out if you retake the exam. . .

17, the husband angrily hit his wife after reading his son's diary. The diary says: Uncle Chen came to my house to play with his mother today, saying that he could eat snacks after finishing his homework. Then, Uncle Chen praised me for doing my homework well, so he picked up my mother. My mother told my uncle to be careful, and then my uncle kissed my mother and me. The wife scolded her son angrily, and the son cried and said, Dad, I made a mistake in punctuation. . .

18, girls are not easy to mess with, hey hey! ! 1, girls wearing boys' clothes are called handsome, and boys wearing girls' clothes are called perverts. 2. Girls are cute when they lose their temper, and boys are hateful when they lose their temper. 3. Girls' tears are called cowardice, while boys' tears are called cowardice. It is natural for girls to spend money on boys, and it is natural for boys to spend money on girls. 5. It is coquetry for a girl to hit a boy, and it is an asshole for a boy to hit a girl. . .

19, a tribe never wears underwear. Tourists advise them that wearing underwear is clean and warm. So I put it on, but I didn't take it off when I defecated. Looking back, hey! It's so clean, there's nothing. Once you sit down, don't say it's really warm. . . . . .

20. What women can't forget is feelings, and what men can't forget is feelings. Feelings precipitate with time and disappear with time. In the final analysis, they are different species, so who can understand whose deep love and who can understand whose departure. -Xu Zhimo