Humorous stories about poor Mandarin.

The joke that he can't speak Mandarin well is 1. The fish seller shouted at the top of his voice, "Fish, fish." Not to be outdone, a jujube seller nearby immediately shouted, "Shit (jujube), shit (jujube)." "Fish." "Oh,no." "Fish." "Shit." The more fish sellers listen, the more wrong they are. He felt that the jujube seller was deliberately targeting him, so they quarreled. The director of a township enterprise will visit Kobe, Japan. He doesn't even speak Mandarin, but only speaks dialects at ordinary times. So he sent his subordinates to find translators, and when he came back, he reported that "none of the Japanese translators could understand the factory director's dialect". The factory director said, "Easy. Let's invite another teacher from our town to translate our dialect into Mandarin first. " The subordinate said, "Not yet. When I arrive in Japan, I have to ask someone to translate Japanese Mandarin into Kobe dialect. " A foreigner with a strong accent got lost in this city. When he saw a gentle young lady coming, he greeted him and asked, "Rabbit (comrade), give me a kiss (sorry) ..." Before the words were finished, the young lady blushed with anger. 4. A southerner came to a snack bar in Beijing and said to the waitress, "How much is it to sleep for one night (a bowl of jiaozi)?" Hearing this, the waiter changed his face and screamed, "rogue!" " Hearing this, the southerner said, "It's only 60 cents. Very cheap. Come for one night (bowl). " 5. A farmer brother and sister used a scooter to pull wheat to the market to sell. A southerner came to their brothers and sisters and asked, "Brother, how much is your little sister (wheat)?" Big brother was so angry that the veins stood out on his forehead. 6. Uncle Niu is shouting: "I sold four pieces of moon cakes." Many people gathered around to buy this "cheap" moon cake, and only when they paid did they know that the moon cake for the elderly was ten yuan and four yuan. 7. The old people in the nursing home held a party on the night of Mid-Autumn Festival. The host, Mrs. Wang, said: "Ladies and gentlemen, the performance is really damn (start). Please be quiet. " 8. A northerner inquired where the "cable car" was in a park in Guangzhou. He searched according to the answer and found the "men's room". 9. On the first morning after a couple got married, the family got up and washed their faces. The bride respectfully said to her mother-in-law, "Mother-in-law, please die (wash) first." After that, the bride said to the groom, "If your mother-in-law dies, will you die?" I paused and said, "My mother-in-law and you are dead, and finally I died." Hearing this, the mother-in-law was livid and couldn't say a word. The bride said, "Mother-in-law, why aren't you dead?" 10, an old lady in Putian sells sugar cane on the roadside. A bus stopped and a foreigner came to the old lady's booth to buy sugar cane. He just weighed the sugar cane without paying. The car started. The old lady urged, "Come on, give me the money and I'll marry you." . "Outsiders were so scared that they didn't even take sugar cane. Get on the bus quickly. 1 1. A country girl came to the supermarket, and the waiter greeted her warmly: "What do you want, miss?" The girl said, "I want your life (noodles), pig grandson (bamboo shoots)." 12, Chunhua met a friend who was shopping with her son. She hurried forward to say hello and boasted, "This little wolf boy (boy) is really cute. "13, a rural primary school was having a class, and the teacher came into the classroom and said," Stand (in class). " The students chorus: "It's good to die of old age (teacher)!" The teacher said, "Students who are vomiting blood, it is good to die early (on)! "14, two country girls came back from the city. It's getting late. When they saw a truck coming, they waved to it. The driver leaned out and a girl said, "Comrade, can we be your wife (car)?" The driver said grumpily, "Who wants you to be my wife?" Another girl said quickly, "It doesn't matter, we are very close. The driver was very angry. He drove away and thought, "Who will go with you?" "15, the village chief said at the villagers' meeting:" Rabbits, shrimps and pickles are too expensive, not pickles, but pig's trotters. " Translating his dialect into Mandarin means: Comrades and villagers, let's have a meeting now, don't talk, pay attention. ?

?

?

?

1

The fish seller shouted loudly:

"

Fish. Fish.

"

Next to a jujube vendor, he shouted:

"

sabotage

(

jujube

)

Los Angeles,

sabotage

(

jujube

)

Los Angeles.

""

Fish.

""

Shit.

""

Fish.

""

Shit.

"

Fish seller

The more you listen, the more wrong it is. I feel that the jujube seller seems to be deliberately targeting him, so

The two men quarreled.

?

?

2

、

The director of a township enterprise will visit Kobe, Japan.

He is even ordinary.

I won't say anything. I usually only speak dialects. So he asked his subordinates to find it.

Translation,

Subordinate back report said:

"

No Japanese translator can understand the director.

mother tongue

"

. The factory director said:

"

It's simple. We'll bring another old man from this town.

Teacher, let him translate our dialect into Mandarin first.

"

Subordinate said:

"

Not yet,

When you arrive in Japan, you must ask someone to take the Japanese.

'

mandarin

'

translate

Become Kobe dialect.

"?

?

three

、

A foreigner with a strong dialect,

Lost in the city,

Kenichi

A gentle lady came up and asked:

"

rabbit

(

comrade

)

, dear

kiss

(

I'm sorry

)

once

......"

I haven't finished yet,

The young lady flushed with anger.