Chen Shiran: Everyone has a mission to accomplish in life.

Now I believe more and more that everyone has a life mission in mind, waiting to be discovered and completed.

It's like, people who are born precocious and wise will unconsciously ask themselves, "Why did I come here in my life?"

People in Zhihu often ask "What is the meaning of living", and many people have answered it. One of the well-received answers is that the meaning of life is self-defined. If you think your life is meaningful, you will have a wonderful life. If you think it is meaningless, you will live a stagnant life.

This answer is very valuable, but many people use it wrong. They agree that "the meaning of life is defined by themselves", but they don't know where to find the meaning, so they fix the "meaning of life" on the people they admire and yearn for. Looking for meaning in the so-called socially successful people is tantamount to constantly distancing yourself from the true meaning of life.

A friend once left me a message saying that the tragedy of many people's lives lies in finding their own way with other people's life maps. How can they find it?

The meaning of life can't be found in others, but only in your own heart. It also has a name, called "Life Mission".

The mission of life, a bit like Marlowe's demand theory, belongs to the highest realm of self-realization. I believe some friends will say that most people are still working hard for their own survival needs and social needs. It is no joke to think about the word "mission".

However, many people don't realize that "the mission of life" is not something that falls from the sky. It seems that we must wait until the material, social identity and respect are satisfied before we can pursue it. In fact, it has not been fully understood in the deep heart, waiting to be discovered by us.

It is not a deep sleep, it appears in all aspects of our lives in various ways, and it is hidden in every choice of growth path.

If you look closely, you will find that everything related to us in life does not come to us for no reason. The colors and smells we like, the academic direction we choose, the workplace we step into, the lovers and friends we choose, the way we handle important moments in life and so on. , all have the unique imprint of our life, just because we are surrounded by all kinds of secular things, only to see things other than desire, fame and fortune, but not the real voice of our life.

Self-revolution is the hardest thing to do for the first time. Because in the process of entanglement, there is no experience to follow, and the resistance from all sides is the strongest, and the fear will be infinitely amplified.

Just like my job, I am unhappy and struggle repeatedly every day, but I don't have the courage to quit. Because the feeling of pain is familiar, the troubles encountered are also familiar, and the body and mind have instinctively known how to deal with its recurrence. This kind of pain becomes unbearable because it is too familiar. However, the consequences of resignation have not been experienced in the world outside work, and the body will instinctively reject strange fields.

At that time, the only self-help mode I could think of was changing posts in the industry, transferring work units in parallel, and changing the soup without changing the medicine. This is also the same choice of many similar people, and I dare not change my life.

But I forgot that what always makes me uncomfortable in the workplace is often not a matter of a few people, nor is it necessarily a problem of a certain type of work, but the inadaptability of the overall gas field. Even if I changed my job, the entanglement is still with me. If I want to get rid of it, I must face the fear of self-revolution

I thought about it at that time, and one day I figured it out:

Staying is a road leading to darkness. There are too many things I can experience in ten or twenty years, and those painful entanglements that I feel repeatedly will always be there, so that I can make a conclusion about my life. Going out, in addition to fear, you can experience other emotions that you can't experience, and you can meet people and things that you can't see now. Life will be more difficult, but at least I don't have to experience the familiar horrors in the past. I can re-plan my life, explore other possibilities and find my true self.

I really feel that I am too pitiful and humble to live now. Even if I smile during the day and pretend to be careless and fearless, who will care about tears in the dead of night? I really feel sorry for him.

After this knot was opened, the first self-revolution was completed.

When you really come out, you will find that there is no fear. There are so many things to relive in life. Different emotions come in, and you are too busy. Nothing that scared you before you quit your job happened, and life began to flow again.

Compared with my old self, I have grown too much. The helpless and wronged little boy in my heart began to get my concern. I learned to understand him, appreciate him and help him. At this time, it was the little boy himself who smiled.

Looking back now, the fear of the first revolution was the greatest, but it was really easy to start life again. The devil controlled everything.

However, after the devil's barrier was opened, the second self-revolution and the third self-revolution faced more and more difficulties, but their inner fears became smaller and smaller, so there was less and less time to struggle before each revolution.

I think this is the embodiment of growth itself. I have changed from the guy who can only survive in the familiar pain in the past to a spiritual struggle who can calmly face the next self-revolution. The tangled time interval is getting shorter and shorter, but people's thinking is getting clearer and clearer.

At the time of the first self-revolution, my understanding of lifelong career and pursuit was a fog. In fact, at that time, my biggest worry was emotional suffering. For two or three years, I have been entangled in other people's emotions and tortured each other every day. At that time, don't talk about lifelong career, even I couldn't see clearly what I liked and was good at.

During the second self-revolution, I broke away from an environment and began to look for myself. Who am I, why do I have so many entanglements, and why do I always hesitate to do things? In 10 months, I fought with myself. I saw many strangers, talked to them, hugged them and reconciled with them. Very hard, very tired, but very happy in my heart.

During the third self-revolution, that is, these three months, I benefited from the self-help and consciousness I learned in the second self-revolution, as well as my understanding of the real self-needs, so I shifted my vision from studying myself to studying the direction of life. The interval between entanglement and repetition has been shortened, the efficiency of thinking things clearly has been improved, and my desire has been put down more decisively.

In February, I decided to leave China. In April, I thought many questions clearly and made clear what I would experience in my life. The emotion I feel at this time is a sense of busyness, a sense of responsibility and a sense of certainty.

In the first stage of self-revolution, the feeling of struggling and complaining is getting farther and farther away from me; In the second stage of self-revolution, the sense of hard work and fatigue is also much less; There are more and more things determined in the third self-revolution.

When I was leaving, I told a friend that I didn't think China was suitable for me, because I didn't think I could take root in this place. Now I think a lot of questions and feel that I have made a mistake. It's not that I can't take root in China, but that I'm in China, and I'm not sure about myself. I am still in the vacillating stage, discerning the pursuit itself, and my heart is floating.

Now, I can feel more and more control over my inner soul, and then I have the idea of taking root.