What if you can't chat and humor?

1. classic student anecdote funny joke, sleeping in the classroom, waking up to find that the teachers and classmates around you have changed, and suddenly feel that they have crossed? Then the teacher on the platform said, this classmate, when he wakes up, go back to his classroom. Don't sleepwalk again. Pretty scary.

2. A drop in the ocean: the performance of high income. Drinking a glass of water is enough to buy a car. The loss of the first marriage: the lack of experience in the first marriage made him dazzled and chose the wrong person. Love at first sight is the version of Let's be friends! ......

3. I was amused by my girlfriend's joke. At first, many people chased my girlfriend and asked her why she chose to be with me. She said, remember our first night? If you promise not to touch me, you really didn't touch me. Of all people, only you did it!

Xiao Li just looked at the salary passbook and couldn't help singing Huangmei Opera. "So happy, there is still a lot of money left?" "No, he sang: Where is my salary!" "Is there a job where money falls from the sky?" "Yes!" "What job?" "Be the tortoise in the wishing pool!"

I heard the conversation at the next table in the middle of the night. Boy: Do you know why you have been single? Girl: Because I am a girl, men like soft girls. Boy: Wrong! Because you are not good-looking, girl: Then do you know why you are single? Boy: Fate hasn't arrived yet. Girl: You are a pig brain. ...

6. Me: "I fell into the water with Wang Sicong. Who will you save first? " Girlfriend: "You are not qualified to fall into the water with Wang Sicong." Me. . . Four characteristics of literary youth: having musical dreams since childhood, quitting to open a cafe, changing the world, starting a business, leaving everything behind to travel!

7. At three o'clock in the morning, I was standing at the intersection and a taxi stopped beside me. The master driver stared at me through the window for a long time. I said to him calmly, "I already said, I won't take a taxi. My friend will pick me up later!" " Driver's master: "I know, I'll leave when he comes ..."

8. On a bus, the conductor asked a man dressed very formally: Sir, where to go, please buy a ticket. The man shouted, you just charge the whole time. I don't care about money. Conductor: OK, one and a half dollars.