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The boat is tired. Reed flowers are shallow. Smoke waves rippling, laughing gulls Fangdian.

In the old days, tears parted, just in spring. Floccules are scattered in the wind.

If you don't complain about leaving your sorrow, the mountains and waters are far away. Take good care of yourself and don't fall in love with your hometown.

A piece of paper is thin and light, and you can expect a swan goose. Acacia is infinite when you put pen to paper.

Body House Exercise 68:

This issue of "The Moon Comes One by One" is written by Li Zhizheng, with 62 words in two tones, and the name of the inscription is the title.

The beat of the epigraph

Smooth and smooth. Smooth and smooth. Flat and flat, flat and flat.

The Milky Way is bright. Spring is coming. Red lilies are blooming everywhere in this city.

Pingzhong, Pingzhong. It is flat. It is flat.

No street fun, dark dust and fragrant face. The bright moon follows people far and near.

Flat and flat, medium and flat and medium. Flat and flat, flat and flat.

For half a day on Aoshan Mountain, Fengta moved west. The east wind is calm, but the bead curtain does not roll.

Middle, middle, flat, flat. It's just plain.

Jade to be returned, listen to the string pipe outside the cloud. I recognized the palace flower shadow.

First draft

? The moon came one after another.

Unclip the cable with the isolation cover. Reed flowers are shallow. The water is clear forever.

Don't cry, stop in Yang Liuan. Floccules dissipate with the wind.

If you don't complain about leaving your sorrow, the mountains and waters are far away. Take care of yourself and don't miss your hometown.

A piece of paper is not heavy, but it should be entrusted to Hongyan. Acacia is infinite when you put pen to paper.

modify

Teacher Long Shiyi pointed out:

1. The lyrics are so-called handy, from scenes to emotions, but they must be logical and cannot be made up.

2. Words are melodic words, focusing on the rhythm and rhythm of expression, so try to be casual and try not to be uncommon.

3. Stop at Yangliu 'an, can you change the lens?

The emotional logic of the lyrics should be that you are boating here and now, reminding you of the farewell here and now.

Telegrams rhyme with each other or with each other.

The teacher pulled Na Whelan out:

There are two "heavy"? This should be meaningless repetition.

Therefore, the final draft was revised again.

Final draft?

The moons come one by one? Recall farewell

The boat is tired. Reed flowers are shallow. Smoke waves rippling, laughing gulls Fangdian.

In the old days, tears parted, just in spring. Floccules are scattered in the wind.

If you don't complain about leaving your sorrow, the mountains and waters are far away. Take good care of yourself and don't fall in love with your hometown.

A piece of paper is thin and light, and you can expect a swan goose. Acacia is infinite when you put pen to paper.

Ps: Laughing gull is my favorite red-billed gull.

postscript

After receiving the exercise questions put forward in "The Poems of Bole Nalan Huiruo", I began to learn the knowledge of inscriptions.

The Moon Comes One by One is the work of Li Zhizheng, a poet in the early Song Dynasty. It was recorded in Volume 16 of Wu Zeng's "A Random Record of Changing Zhai" and won the appreciation of Su Dongpo.

Li Ci wrote the scene of Yuanxiao in Bianjing in the Northern Song Dynasty. It was the author's initiative to write lyrics in this tone, and later Zhang, Zhang, Zhang and others filled in this epigraph.

Learn lyrics for the first time. I often hear people say "poetry expresses ambition, words express expression", but I fail to understand it deeply.

Wang Guowei pointed out in the "Revised Draft of Ci on Earth": "Ci is the body and should be revised. You can say what poetry cannot say, and you can't say what poetry can say. Poetry is wide and long. "

The above study is accumulated. Let me try. The practice process is still because logic and rhythm are full of jokes. Thank you for your patient guidance.