It's better to give you a walking EQ-Bo Huang.

There is a double spring in the music industry and a "double yellow" in the entertainment industry: Huang Lei and Bo Huang.

Huang Lei is famous for his high IQ, while Bo Huang is loved by everyone because of his high EQ.

The concept of EQ was first put forward by two American psychologists. Later, Daniel Gorman, the father of EQ, wrote EQ: Why EQ is More Important than IQ, which made the concept of EQ popular all over the world.

Gorman believes that this kind of emotional intelligence consists of five characteristics:

Self-awareness, emotional control, self-motivation, cognition of others' emotions and handling of their relationships.

In China, the concept of "EQ" is more understood as recognizing other people's emotions and dealing with their relationships. These abilities related to interpersonal communication are what people often call "talking" and "pleasing".

Bo Huang is the representative of this "high EQ".

Stephen Chow invited Bo Huang to play the Monkey King in The Journey to the West.

In the 83rd edition of The Journey to the West, the Monkey King created a classic representative of Peking Opera by six-year-old children.

Later, Stephen Chow created a comedy version of the classic "Wulitou" in A Chinese Odyssey.

This time, it is no ordinary challenge to play the leading role in the movie directed by Master Xing.

Bo Huang realized this, so he refused twice.

He said to Stephen Chow, "Your mountain is too high for me to climb."

Bo Huang was able to know himself clearly and remain modest, and also expressed his respect and praise for Stephen Chow himself.

Later, in the propaganda process of Journey to the West and Demon Reduction, Master Xing said: "Bo Huang is now Wang Zhongwang among comedians ... When I saw Boss Wen (article), I felt that he had put an end to my acting career; When I saw (Bo Huang) again, I felt that my boss and I were gone. "

Faced with such a high evaluation, Bo Huang replied: "Wang Zhongwang? Master Xing is saying that I am ham sausage. "

Boss Huang didn't feel overwhelmed or complacent, but made everyone laugh modestly and humorously.

In the variety reality show "Extreme Challenge", there is a paragraph in which ice is transported by quilt. Show Lo was puzzled and thought that using the quilt would accelerate the melting. Bo Huang and others explained it to him for a long time, but Show Lo still didn't understand.

Show Lo is an early artist, and his cultural knowledge can't be compared with that of Professor Huang Lei.

Bo Huang did not accuse Show Lo of low education level and lack of common sense, but said that Show Lo lacked similar life experience.

There are indeed differences in knowledge and skills between people.

Bo Huang does not have the advantages and disadvantages of prejudice and discrimination against others, nor does he demand others by his own standards. This is both wisdom and kindness.

20 14, "Flowers Blooming" was released, and a reporter asked whether Bo Huang would replace Ge You as "king of comedy".

You can't answer "yes" to this question, but it would be hypocritical to take a step back and deny it.

Bo Huang answered like this:

Bo Huang didn't directly answer the question of "hot mouth", but faced the problem of personal achievement and development with a wise and modest equal heart.

In the first issue of Extreme Challenge, Lai fell ill and Bo Huang had to carry him to the hospital.

Lai felt guilty for dragging everyone down.

Instead of comforting him, Bo Huang said a cliche like "People won't blame you", but said, "I'm not well, I'm sorry."

This is really about the patient: it is about the health of the patient, not that the patient may drag others down.

This is kindness from the heart.

There are many examples of Bo Huang's "high EQ", which can be seen in movies, interviews and variety shows.

So, what are we talking about when we are talking about this kind of high emotional intelligence that is both "talking" and "pleasing"?

Bo Huang has been singing in various bars since she was a teenager, and all kinds of bosses and guests have dealt with each other.

In places like karaoke bars, there are many unexpected situations, which make Bo Huang practice great improvisation.

Before becoming an actor, Bo Huang sang songs for seven years, taught himself to dance, worked as a voice actor and even opened a toy store, which gave him rich social experience.

However, after becoming famous for the movie "Get on the bus, let's go", Bo Huang chose the performance department of Beijing Film Academy. At that time, he was 28 years old, but he still understood the importance of knowledge and study.

Rich social experience and knowledge can let people know what kind of situation they are in, who they are facing and what their needs are, so as to say the right things and do the right things.

Thinking comes first. If you don't even have basic common sense and discrimination, "emotional intelligence" is out of the question.

From Bo Huang's words, we can find that whether he is praised or teased, he is not angry or eager to fight back, but responds with a modest and humorous attitude.

This kind of modesty is not deliberately belittling oneself, nor is it hypocritical modesty.

There is a very special hexagram in the sixty-four hexagrams in Zhouyi:

Dry divination: Kun divination on the top and Gen divination on the bottom.

Kun stands for land, Gen stands for mountain. This image means that the ground is above and the mountain is below, which is very strange. Why is the mountain underground?

Ordinary people understand "modesty" as taking the initiative to show weakness, putting others high and lowering themselves, which is a concession without purpose and principle.

But "modest divination" is not like this, not blindly low.

It's like this: Seen from the ground in the distance, the mountain is not invisible in dew, but flat with other ground. Only when you come to the edge of this empty valley, can you find that there is indeed a mountain below it, which is "the empty valley hides peaks, low but not lost" and is at peace with your inner opinion.

This is why the modesty of those with "high emotional intelligence" will not make people feel hypocritical and flattering, because they are not deliberately giving in, but open-minded and equal.

This equality comes from early knowledge and experience: the more you know, the more people you meet, the more you can understand the multidimensional nature of the world, and the more you can understand all kinds of people and things, thus generating your own opinions and modesty.

Wisdom and experience are fundamental, modesty is a person's mind, and the ultimate goal based on these is goodwill.

Why do some people tell jokes and shake their burdens, and everyone will think it is grandstanding;

When someone praises others, it will be regarded as flattery;

However, Bo Huang's "smart" humor won the hearts of the people, and his praise for others was used infinitely.

Because of his humor, these "sweet words" are all from good intentions.

He won't look down on Show Lo who doesn't understand the principle of heat, but feels that his life experience is different;

I think LAY's illness is not a drag, but he goes to the hospital behind his back and cares about his physical condition.

In the face of Yan Ni's ridicule, instead of being angry, he praised Yan Ni with joy and embarrassment.

If intelligence is a gift, then kindness is a choice. People's ultimate inner pride comes not from their own talents, but from their own choices.

Therefore, the truly "high emotional intelligence" people are not those who let their intelligence achieve their goals, but "recognize the essence of life, still love life, see the ugliness of human nature, and still choose kind people."