Classic love funny quotes

Love is the strong attachment, closeness, yearning, selfless and all-consuming emotion between people. The following are "classic funny love quotes", I hope it will be helpful to everyone!

1. You clean the house for me, and I will clean the world for you!

2. Even if there are thousands of words, they can't be compared to the mistress's words of "I love you."

3. There are thousands of men in the world, but if you are unhappy, you will change them every day.

4. When I see you, I lose my appetite, so why talk about sexual desire?

5. Don’t look back, I only love your back.

6. What is love in the world? The sage replied: "Trash!"

7. One day, your name will appear in my family's household registration book.

8. Some people were once friends, but after confessing their love, they can no longer even remain friends.

9. Marriage is like a maze. The person who builds it has already lost his way first.

10. A good woman feeds a bad man’s appetite; a bad woman whets a man’s appetite.

11. When people want to use banknotes, they never look at its issuance date.

12. You are the wind and I am the sand, you are the leather shoes and I am the brush, if you ignore me I will commit suicide!

13. If you marry into a "rich family", you must know how to manage money; if you marry into a "poor family", you must know how to make money.

14. When you grow up, you want to marry Tang Seng as your husband. If you want to be pampered, dote on him. If you don’t want to play with him, eat him up.

15. Every time I think of you, a grain of sand falls from the sky, and it becomes the Sahara from then on.

16. When arguing with others, take a step back and the sky will be brighter; when chasing your girlfriend, take a step back and the sky will be empty.

17. Why are you so stupid? Do you know that you have to stand behind me no matter what happens in the future?

18. If you can give me unchanging love throughout my life, I will definitely give you unfailing companionship.

19. When will you marry me home? Everything in my room has almost been moved to your house...

20. A child in the back seat will have an accident, and an accident in the back seat will have a child.

21. I am willing to stay by your side all my life, being your quilt in winter and your electric fan in summer.

22. Searching for you from the southeast to the northwest, following you from front to back, from left to right, falling in love with you in spring, summer, autumn and winter, holding you tightly through wind, rain, thunder and lightning.

23. I really want to hold your hand and walk the road of revolution together. How do you express your love? Don’t think I am ugly!

24. Smile! Smile! Laugh until your teeth fall out! Have a sweet dream tonight, in the dream I will smile at you!

25. When I mentioned marriage before, I thought of "forever", but now when I think of marriage, I think of "how long it will last."

26. A man’s love is a matter of affection, a woman’s love is a duty, a man’s love is a talent, and a woman’s love is a nameless thing.

27. When you are passionately in love, you always promise to get married again in your next life; after you get married, you often wonder whether you committed evil in your previous life.

28. The one riding the white horse may not be a prince, he may be Tang Monk; the one with wings may not be an angel, he may be a bird.

29. What a man is most proud of is not how many women he has owned, but how many men his woman is willing to reject for him.

30. Oh, you seem to get a lot of pleasure when you scold me! If you want to enjoy this feeling every day, marry me!

31. I miss you just like the Cowherd misses the Weaver Girl. I love you just like the mouse loves rice. I miss you just like the monkey breaks off the corn.

32. I once told myself not to be emotional anymore, but just by hearing your voice, I fell deeply in love with you. I'm done.

33. Kuo proposed to Tongue, and Tongue carefully replied: You are too talkative. When I see you, I am speechless and unable to communicate.

34. Lip proposed marriage to Tongue, but Tongue looked disdainful: You are a gun and I am a sword. When I am with you, I don’t have to quarrel with each other every day.

35. You are the shore, I am the boat, you are the sun, I turn around for you, happiness can only be calculated by you, and you would not change it for the world.

36. If you want a lovely baby, and if you are still hesitant about it, let me give you a little suggestion - marry me!

37. Insist on your wife’s absolute leadership.

At home, my wife always comes first, my children come second, my puppy comes third, and I come fourth.

38. Yesterday you ran around in my mind all day long, and you stayed with me in my dreams all night. I want to say: Thank you for your hard work!

39. If you don’t think my memory (deposit) is not enough, and my hardware (house) is not perfect enough, I hope to share a server with you.

40. Boy, in order for you to stop harming the world and messing with the relationship between men and women, my sister will accept you. From now on, remember to be always there for you, don’t struggle anymore...

41. You are the most beautiful in my eyes: a hooked nose and a toad's mouth, mouse eyes and bandy legs, and a mouth under the nose, drooling.

42. Me! I want! I want you! I want you to look at me! I want you to look into my eyes! I want you to look into my eyes and say! You want me!

43. I am from Yuanmou, Yunnan, and you are from Zhoukou, Beijing. I hold your downy hand and take a bite. Love makes us walk upright.

44. I am a bird imprisoned by you. I have forgotten how high the sky is, but my madness cannot be tolerated in this chaotic city. Tears are my only luxury.

45. Toss a coin and ask God if I love you. If it's positive, then it means I love you. If it's negative, then, can God be wrong too?

46. Alpine Yizhimei, who do you love? I want to have sex with you, no one can stop me! When I get married, I become obscene, and I am so crazy. I'm so cool when I'm gay!

47. If you blink your eyes, I will die. If you blink again, I will come to life. If your eyes keep blinking, I will live and die!

48. Failure in foreign languages ??proves that I am patriotic; I show off all day long, but I actually have no wife; I have a small belly, pretending to be Maitreya Buddha; I chirp everywhere, like a giant grasshopper.

49. Women are so wonderful, they can give birth and sleep; they jump when they see money; they laugh when they have food; when they have no money or food, their faces change their tone, and when they speak, they sound like ghosts!

50. The image of a man has only one purpose: to attract girls. So once a girl gets it, she will sadly find that this man has no image at all.

51. I am the salt in your food. Without me, everything loses its flavor. I am your sun in winter, your popsicle in summer, and your big umbrella on cloudy days.

52. I would like to be a winged bird in the sky. The air pollution is too bad. If we do tree trimming on the ground, deforestation and logging are unreliable. If the people of the world want to be happy, environmental protection must be done first!

53. My little sister loves her brother so much, and meeting her in a long-distance place is better than her hometown. My brother’s thoughts are the same as my sister’s, and I will never let you down. We are tied to each other by our old age, and we are like mandarin ducks together.

54. You are my cotton-padded jacket in winter and ice cream in summer. You are the Apollo in my life. I am willing to pull carts and collect rags for you! I hope to walk side by side with you, and I will definitely be able to walk through thousands of mountains!

55. You are handsome, you are handsome, you are the most handsome in the world. You have a nest of cabbage on your head, a sack on your body, and a piece of kelp around your waist. You think you are the Invincible of the East, but in fact you are the second declining god. generation.