A simple joke that can make me laugh. A cold joke will do. )

Xiaoming: Dad, why are hen's legs so short? Dad: Fool, you don't even understand this. If the hen's legs are long, the eggs will break when laying! !

0, the teacher asked the students: How to explain that sharing pain with others will halve the pain? Xiao Ming explained: If my father hits me, I will hit his dog.

1. A centipede is in a bad mood. His father asked, What's the matter with you? The little centipede said, I said I was afraid you couldn't stand it. Dad: Go ahead, I can stand it. The little centipede shook his 100-odd leg and said, I want to buy Li Ning shoes on National Day.

The five-year-old daughter asked her father to do something for her. Dad: "Dad is very tired. Give me a compliment, and I will be refreshed again. " Daughter: "Lao Zheng!" Dad: "Hey!" Daughter: "Your Niu Niu is really beautiful ..."

God wanted to listen to music and took MJ away.

God wanted to watch AV and took Okubo Matsuo away.

God wanted to watch CCTV and took Luo Jing away.

God wants to see "Xiao Xin's father" in cartoons.

God, why don't you ever watch China football?

During the bus rush hour this morning, I occasionally saw a man take out his mobile phone from his bag to look at the time, and then said "I am Cao", thinking that his time was too late. Looking closely, he has an air conditioner remote control in his hand.

5. During the Water-splashing Festival, everyone splashed water on each other to bless them. Suddenly a man scolded: Shit, who spilled water on me?

Others advised that throwing you is a blessing.

Don't do that, the curse said. Who threw boiling water at me?

6. Give some examples of being a late bloomer: Huang Zhong fought Liu Bei at the age of 60, Tokugawa Ieyasu at the age of 70, Jiang Ziya as prime minister at the age of 80, She Taijun at the age of 100, the Monkey King at the age of 500 to go to the Western Heaven to learn Buddhist scriptures, and Bai Niangzi fell in love at the age of 1000!

Once the bell rings, everyone must go home. When going down the stairs, my left foot stepped on my right foot and hit the middle of the road heavily. I want to be embarrassed and pretend to be dizzy. As a result, the classmates next to me saw me motionless, quickly helped me up, and then slapped me on the body.

8. Xiaoming lies opposite the theater, occupying four positions. Someone told him to get up, but he only helped him twice. The security guard came over and said, "Damn ~ Brother, which way is it?" He gritted his teeth and said, I fell down in the upstairs corridor!

9. The students traveled and climbed to the top of the mountain. A girl stood on the top of the mountain very excitedly and shouted: motherland, my mother! Then a boy who secretly loves this girl shouted excitedly: motherland, my mother-in-law!

10, a foreign tourist visited the orchard, bragging as he walked, "In our country, oranges look like football, banana trees look like iron towers ..." He tripped over a pile of watermelons.

A fruit grower nearby shouted, "Be careful of our grapes ..."