What does this joke mean ... Parrots always swear and refuse to change. The owner was very angry and put it in the refrigerator.

According to the answer, I found the "men's room".

9. On the first morning after a couple got married, the family got up and washed their faces. The bride respectfully said to her mother-in-law, "Mother-in-law, you should die first." After that, the bride said to the groom, "My mother-in-law is dead, will you die?" After a pause, he said, "My mother-in-law and you are dead, and finally I am dead." Hearing this, the mother-in-law was livid and couldn't say a word. The bride said, "Mother-in-law, why are you still alive?"

10, an old lady in Putian sells sugar cane on the roadside. A bus stopped and a foreigner came to the old lady's booth to buy sugar cane. Just after weighing the sugar cane, the car started without paying. The old lady urged, "Come on, give me the money and I'll marry you." Outsiders were so scared that they didn't even take sugar cane, so they quickly got on the bus.

1 1. A country girl came to the supermarket, and the waiter greeted her warmly: "What do you want, miss?" The girl said, "I want your life (noodles), pig grandson (bamboo shoots)."

12, Chunhua met a friend who was shopping with her son. She hurried forward to say hello and praised: "This little wolf boy (boy) is really cute."

13, a rural primary school was having a class, and the teacher came into the classroom: "Stand (sit in) the class." The students said in unison, "It's good to be old and dead!" The teacher said, "Students, it's good to die early!" "

14, two country girls came back from the city. It's getting late. When they saw a truck coming, they waved to it. The driver leaned out and a girl said, "Comrade, can we be your wife (car)?" The driver said angrily, "Who wants you to be my wife?" Another girl quickly said, "It doesn't matter, we are very close." The driver was so angry that he drove away and thought, "Who will go with you?"

15, the village chief said at the villagers' meeting: "Rabbits, shrimps and pickles are too expensive, not pickles, but pig's trotters." Translate his dialect into Mandarin: Comrades and villagers, let's have a meeting now. Don't talk, but pay attention.

When my friends and I first moved, there was no TV at home, which was very boring. Let's pretend that there is a TV set on the desk, and then we can change the channel by pretending that we have a remote control. This son of a bitch keeps changing channels. I told him, but he wouldn't listen. Then we started fighting.

The teacher asked Xiaoming questions in class, but Xiaoming stood up without saying a word.

Teacher: Xiaoming?

Teacher: Xiaoming

Teacher: Xiaoming! What's the matter with you? Do you know the answer or not? At least let me know!

Xiao Ming: Zhi ~

Three rabbits shit.

The first one is only long.

The second one is just spherical.

The third one is actually triangular.

Asked, it replied: I pinched it with my hand.

Pig Bajie was making out with Chang 'e on the moon when suddenly a dark shadow passed by and Pig Bajie hurriedly carried a rake.

After chasing him out, he came back after a while and said, damn it, Yang Liwei. ......

A man kept a parrot. The parrot was so strong that all the other birds in it were killed by it.

Later, the master brought back an eagle and put it together. When the owner came to see it, the parrot's hair hung outside the cage.

The host said, "Not this time."

But on closer inspection, the eagle died, and the parrot said naked, "This grandson is really amazing. If you don't take off your arm, you can't beat Yating. "

Have you ever heard the joke that the big pig said yes and the little pig said no? Most people will answer no.

Today, I played CS in the Internet cafe. Not far away, there are two non-mainstream players playing hard. 5. Press the keyboard with a bang! I am very distressed!

So, I also started to press the keyboard! I pressed hard! Press hard! Press faster than them! Louder than them!

They couldn't help looking over, and I glanced at them contemptuously on purpose! They changed their faces and gave me a hard look! I'll stare back at you right away!

They went on playing with a livid face, but the noise exceeded mine!

Would I want to? So, I beat the keyboard with my palm! Clap hard! Clap hard!

Those two guys stopped hitting hard at first sight and started hitting the keyboard! Louder than me again!

How can I stop? Knock on the keyboard with your fist at once! Hit hard! Hit hard!

The two men looked at each other and began to hit the keyboard! The noise has surpassed me again! I won't give up! Tear off the keyboard! Just throw it on the ground! I stepped on it hard Step hard!

Everyone in the internet cafe gave me the warmest applause! Those two non-mainstream idiots are at a loss!

However, under my provocative eyes, they are also angry! They also ripped off the keyboard! Throw it on the ground and step on it! Then they looked at me defiantly!

At this time, the network management of the Internet cafe surrounded them! A webmaster looked at the keyboard trampled by them and slapped it in the face! Then the network management swarmed! Beat up two non-mainstream!

Finally, two non-mainstream people were lying on the ground, and one of them pointed at me weakly and asked, "Why didn't you ... hit him?"

A webmaster kicked him in the past: "People play CS and bring their own keyboards!"

One day, on the bus, a lady left her seat to buy a ticket. When I came back, I found that my seat was occupied by another woman. I was very unwilling and said loudly: It's not easy to lay eggs, but it takes up the nest quickly. When the woman sitting in the seat heard this, she quickly stood up and said with a smile: I'm sorry for delaying your laying!

A man kept a parrot. The parrot was so strong that all the other birds in it were killed by it.

Later, the master brought back an eagle and put it together. When the owner came to see it, the parrot's hair hung outside the cage.

The host said, "Not this time."

But on closer inspection, the eagle died, and the parrot said naked, "This grandson is really amazing. If you don't take off your arm, you can't beat Yating. "

A driver is driving a truck full of hens, teasing his parrot while driving. When a beautiful woman hitchhiked, the driver put the parrot and the hen together in the cargo box and invited the beautiful woman to sit in the cab. After driving for a while, the driver tentatively asked the beauty, "May I kiss you?" The beauty shook her head shyly and said, "No". After waiting for a while, the driver reluctantly asked, "Can you hug me?" The beauty still shook her head and said, "No."The driver said angrily, "If you can't, go down." After driving for a while, the driver felt that his behavior was very ungentlemanly, so he went back and invited the beautiful woman to get on the bus. But after a while, the driver asked, "May I kiss you?" Beauty still shook her head. "Can I have a hug?" Beauty still shook her head. "If you can't, go down." This was repeated three times, and finally I got to the chicken farm. The driver opened the suitcase and found that there were few hens in Miu Miu. Only the parrot mentioned a hen and asked, "Can a beautiful woman kiss me?" The hen shook her head desperately, and the parrot asked, "Can you hug me?" The hen still shook her head. The parrot said, "If you can't, go down." The hen was thrown out of the car. ......

The little white rabbit met a wolf while walking in the forest. He came up and put two big ear stickers on the little white rabbit and said, "I told you not to wear a hat." The little white rabbit left very grievance.

The next day, she skipped out of the house wearing a hat and met the wolf again. He came up and gave the white rabbit two big mouths and said, "I told you to wear a hat."

Tutu is depressed. After thinking for a long time, I finally decided to complain to the king of the forest, Tiger.

After explaining the situation, the tiger said, "OK, I see. I will handle this matter, so trust the organization." On the same day, the tiger found his partner wolf. "It is wrong for you to do so. This is very difficult for me. " Then he wiped the dust off the table: "Do you think this will work?" You can say, Tutu, come and find me a piece of meat! She found a fat one and you said you wanted a thin one. She found a thin one, and you said you wanted a fat one. So you can hit her. Of course, you can also say that. Tutu, come and find me a woman. She found plump ones, and you said you liked slim ones. She found a slim one, and you said you liked the plump one. You can beat her. It is both reasonable and powerful. "The wolf nodded and clapped his hands, and the reverence for the tiger once again reached a new peak. Unexpectedly, the above instructions were heard by the little white rabbit who was weeding the tiger's house outside the window. I hate this in my heart.

The next day, the little white rabbit went out again. What a coincidence! It's the big bad wolf coming. The wolf said, "Tutu, come and find me a piece of meat." Tutu said, "So, do you want to be fat or thin?" The wolf listened, his heart sank and he was happy again. He said, fortunately, there is a plan B. He added, "Tutu, Mary, find me a woman." Tutu asked, "So, do you like plump or slim?" The wolf was silent for 2 seconds and raised his hand to give Tutu two big ear stickers. "Shit, I told you not to wear a hat."

The little white rabbit skipped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Oh, sorry, not that much."

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay.

The next day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

Boss: "Sorry, there is still no"

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay again.

On the third day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

The boss said happily, "Yes, yes, we have a hundred buns today! ! "

The little white rabbit took out the money: "Great, I'll buy two!" " "

A pupil confessed to his long-cherished teacher. The teacher said it was wrong, but he wouldn't listen. Finally, the teacher couldn't stand it anymore and said, I don't want children. The pupil said: I will be careful! "。

A mental hospital heard that the leader would come to the hospital to inspect the situation, so the dean called a meeting of the patients in the hospital at the meeting.

The dean said: "This afternoon, there are very important leaders coming to visit, and all the people will meet them at the door. Zaihuan

When greeting, all the patients stood on both sides of the hospital gate, standing neatly. As soon as I cough, everyone plays drums together.

Palm, the warmer the better; When I stamp my foot, I must stop completely. I can't make mistakes. If everyone is ready,

We can give you meat buns tonight. As long as one person screws up, everyone has no buns to eat. Remember.

have you finished? "The patients in the audience shouted together:" Remember! "

This afternoon, the leader arrived on time. When he stepped into the gate, the popular patient was already standing at the door.

At that time, with the cough of the hospital dean, all the patients applauded together, and the atmosphere was very warm. Visiting leaders

Infected by the warm atmosphere and with a smile on his face, he applauded and walked into the hospital with everyone. See the leader has entered the doctor.

When the hospital director stamped his foot, all the applause stopped and it was neat. Only this leader is still playing drums with a smile.

The dean felt very satisfied when he walked forward. Suddenly, a disease as strong as Schwarzenegger emerged from the welcome crowd.

People, strode to the front of the leadership, picking up Yuan gave him a big slap in the face and shouted angrily-"Your ya don't want to eat steamed stuffed bun? ! ! ! "

There are three people, competing marksmanship together, and a black man is holding something as a target.

The first man put an apple on the black man's head, and then at a distance of 10 meters, he raised his hand and shot it and broke it. He blew his gun and said, I'm Zorro!

The second man put a cherry on the black man's head, and then at a distance of 50 meters, he raised his hand and shot it and broke it. He blew the muzzle and said, I'm m007.

The third man put a sesame seed on the black man's head, and then raised his hand to smash the black man's head at a distance of 100 meters. He also blew the gun and said, I'm sorry ...

A scientist went to the South Pole and met a group of penguins. He asked one of them, "What do you do every day?" Penguin said, "Eat, sleep and beat peas."

Later, he met a little penguin, very cute, and asked him, "What do you do every day, little friend?" The little penguin said, "Eat and sleep." The scientist was stupefied and immediately asked, "Why don't you hit peas?"

The little penguin said, "Because I am a bean."

The funniest name in the country ~ ~ Don't laugh! !

According to the name inquiry system of the Ministry of Public Security, China's funniest name ~ ~

Liu Chan Le Jing Yue (still a man)

Fan Jianji Liang Cong Fan Tong

Xia Zhu Yiqun (thanks to his parents)

Pang Duguang Qi Yanwei Jin Sheng

Jiao Hougen Shen Jingbing Du Ziteng

First place: Shi

I recommend some classic Flash to the landlord!

1, Bullying Miss 1860

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2. Xiao Cui's suicide note

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3. Mobile VS Unicom

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4. Unicom VS Mobile

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5, pig pig classic dialogue

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China humor king:

China Entertainment Network:

Haha paradise;

Haha Comic Network:

Rundong.com:

Youyou joke network:

Leke Bar:

Laughter and slip of the tongue

China Xiaolin daquan

Non-children joke

Ancient jokes

Campus joke

Celebrity humor

Foreign jokes

Modern jokes

Humorous prose

joke book

VV joke station

Exam joke

Classic humor joke network

Qingdao Joke Network:

Changle joke network:

Quanzhou Joke Station:

Happy man joke network:

Sb joke network:

Yahoo! Joke:

Trendy network jokes:

References:

Little idiot messenger, tidy up! Strongly despise, copy and steal others' achievements.

Don't worry, the best things come when you least expect them to.