Homophonic joke ancient

1.

The newly appointed county magistrate here is from Shandong. Because he has to pay the bill, he said to his host. You buy me two bamboo poles. ? Did tout put on a Shandong accent? Bamboo pole? Understand? Pig liver? He promised and hurried to the butcher's shop and said to the shopkeeper, Grandpa Xinxian wants to buy two pieces of pork liver. You know better! ? The shopkeeper is a clever man. He immediately cut off two pieces of pig liver and gave a pair of pig ears. Out of the butcher's shop, tout thought, My master told me to buy pig liver. Of course, this pig ear is mine, so I wrapped it up and stuffed it in my pocket. Go back to the county government and report to the magistrate of a county: Report back to grandpa, I bought pig liver! ? The magistrate of a county was very angry when he saw the touts buying pig liver. Where are your ears? ? Hearing this, the master turned pale with fear and quickly replied:? Ears? Ears? Here? On me? In my pocket! ?

2.

A noble official invited a banquet. The cook was sent to prison by your officials because the cake he fried was raw. The next day, your official held another banquet. Two people want to save the cook. One person pretends to be a fortune teller, and the other pretends to be an old man. Please count the eight characters and borrow the banquet to tell your fortune.

Fortune teller: When did you start to respect old Geng Jia?

The old man deliberately said loudly: bing zi sheng.

The fortune teller shouted again and again: no.

The old man pretended to be unhappy and asked, it's only been a year and there is no time. How could it be bad?

The fortune teller said: Jiazi was still in prison yesterday, not to mention that you were born in Bingzi (homophonic cake).

The guests all burst out laughing. Your official understood the meaning and released the chef.

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