Personality funny quotations that make people laugh.

1. Although you wear cologne, I can still vaguely smell that scum.

2. A person's life is like taking a shit. Sometimes you are full of energy, but all you come out is fart.

3. A lover will eventually become an animal ... If you don't fuck her for one day, she will let someone else fuck her tomorrow!

4. Classic to death.

5. Q: What do you like about me? A: I like you to stay away from me!

6. Try gold with fire, girls with gold and boys with girls.

7. From heaven to hell, I drifted across the world!

8. I have a little thought, but I don't lack it; I have a good temper, but not without it!

9. I am pure fiction. If I am online, I will be cursed!

10. Prostitution was due to lack of money, but now it is due to lack of boys.

1 1. What are you doing up so early? The bar hasn't opened yet!

12. My dream: I have something to do as a secretary and nothing to do as a secretary. The reality is that the secretary can't do it, and the secretary can't do anything.

13. Love your neighbor with your heart, but don't let her husband know!

14. Like is a touch of love; Love is deep love.

15. I won't bend over if there is a pie in the sky, just because I can't even lose it, let alone lose money.

16. Memory is a bridge, but it leads to a lonely prison.

17. You may not study hard, but you must not review well.

18. Even believe in advertisements. You must be stupid to study!

19. Debut at the age of, and make progress every day at the age of. Dream big at the age of 20 and work hard at the age of 20. Years old is basically oriented, and years old is popular everywhere. 18 years old playing mahjong, 18 years old wandering around. Lesbians are always at home and are still hanging on the wall at the age of 20!

20. Life is like taking a shit. Sometimes you are full of energy, and what comes out is nothing but a fart.

2 1. Everyone pretends to understand, but only a few idiots still don't understand.

22. Come back, I can't fool you alone!

23. Don't talk to me about life, talk to me about strangers!

24. Pay more attention to Three Gorges Online, and you can share more classic inventory.

25. There are no traces of birds in the sky, but I have flown!

26. It is much more difficult to catch brain cells than eggs.

27. As long as people are separated, people who are familiar with each other will gradually alienate.

28. The brothers in the dormitory decided to punish Director Zhang as follows: let him hold the telephone pole covered with advertisements of old Chinese medicine and cry with tears: My illness has finally been saved!

29. I am dried cow dung.

30. How many Chinese cabbages will sleep with me?

3 1. Shake, shake, shake to Naihe Bridge.

32. You don't have to be a mother if you have milk, but you must be a grandfather if you have money!

On this day, a group of Japanese people visited our school-to be honest, this is the first time I have seen Japanese people wearing clothes!

We don't know what we have until we lose it.

I bury corn in the soil in spring, and I will harvest a lot of corn in autumn. I bury my wife in the ground in spring, and I will be shot in autumn!

No one has stepped on my head since I turned into shit.

37. The crowd searched for him for thousands of Baidu, and suddenly looking back, the man still disdained me …

38. I am far away from my dream. Perfection is such a extravagant idea. Finally, I collected enough wounds to know that happiness is enough.

39. Girls are like moon cakes in Mid-Autumn Festival. After fifteen nights, they are worthless!

40. Heaven is in the girl's cave!

4 1. Work today, sleep yesterday!

42. Girls are tools for making people, and boys are people who use tools.

Maybe one day we must be strangers, so please leave all the misfortunes on my shoulders. ...

44. Come on, drag it out, jj slice and fry the green pepper!

45. Who held my hand and made me crazy for half my life? Who, kiss my eyes, cover my half-life displacement.

46. Be a rogue with temperament, a pervert with taste, and an illiterate with knowledge!

47. I always wander between cow A and cow C.

48. In abstinence, please don't disturb! Or I'll break the rules.

49. Before marriage, boys should borrow money to let girls eat well, and after marriage, girls should borrow money to let boys eat well.

50. If you love several people at the same time, you are young; If you only love one person, then you are old; If you don't love anyone, you have been born again.

5 1. I haven't been cheap for a long time, bitch. I heard that you became a man and a woman?

52. It is inevitable to blame the hand of the moment and write love as love.

53. People's loneliness can sometimes be seen from the body!

54. The world is cold and cold, and people are warm and cold.

55. Fill her emptiness with your surplus!

There is an old legend that people who can see beautiful women on the campus of Beihou University will live forever. ...

57. I'd rather you hold other girls and miss me than you hold me and miss other girls.

58. The forest is so big that I can't even find a hanged tree!

59. This QQ is a long-term agent who accosted and was accosted. Smile and welcome women and children to negotiate.

60. How far is forever? Get out, boy!

6 1. Rape the Japanese on the moon. Let the earth people talk!

62. I have a left Qinglong, a right White Tiger and a Mickey Mouse tattooed on my shoulder.

63. I'm not afraid of beautiful women treating me like a pervert, but I'm afraid of ugly women treating me like a hooligan!

64. More and more young people begin to get tattoos. Think about the summer after forty or fifty years. Tattooed elderly men and women ...

65. Girls with various amorous feelings are lighters, while girls who don't know amorous feelings are fire extinguishers.

66. The mosquito was really angry after biting you, but what was even more angry was that it bit you, but you couldn't find it!

67. Emotion is mean, and it is mean again and again. When you stop being a bitch, the girl comes!

68. Reading this day, I was depressed to see that Emperor Kangxi became the king of a country at the age of twenty-three. But when I saw that the Tongzhi emperor was 23 years old and had died for four years, my heart was balanced.

69. It feels great to live silently once in a while, but it will be miserable …

70. If you want to wander the rivers and lakes, you'd better be single!

7 1. Life is sometimes like being raped by a eunuch-resistance is pain, not resistance is still pain!

72. If there were not too many liars, I would have sold my kidney!

73. Real good brothers and sisters are not always together with endless topics, but together, even if they don't talk, they won't feel embarrassed.

74. There is only one reason to move forward and one hundred reasons to retreat. Many people find a hundred reasons to prove that he is not a coward all day, but never prove that he is a warrior with one reason.

When I was born, God promised to marry his most beautiful daughter to me. I looked everywhere, looked up and down, and waited for several years, but I didn't see the shadow of the fairy. I was depressed, so I ran to ask God. God said: What's your hurry? I don't even have a female brother or sister!

76. The dinosaur said: Don't worry if you encounter abnormal conditions; When you meet an animal, appreciate it slowly. ...

77. There are two ways to pollute a place: garbage or money!

78. Boys give girls corsets to show that they want to establish a lover relationship; Girls give boys underwear, indicating that there is a lover relationship.

79. People who are born not afraid of death are not born, so don't pretend to be TM!

80. After meeting me, you will suddenly find-Ah, handsome can be so single-minded!

8 1. Buddha said: I also use Fuyanjie!

82. The boy's yearning is a desire for the body and a heartfelt call for sexual desire. Unfortunately, I got this disease, which is called acacia.

83. Philosophers' feelings are discussion questions, writers' feelings are composition questions, mathematicians' feelings are calculation questions, politicians' feelings are decision-making questions, and ordinary people's feelings are filling questions and filling boring life with feelings.

84. Look into my eyes and you will see persistence and sincerity except chewing gum.

85. After graduating from college, one day I saw a classmate I hadn't contacted for a long time on the other side of the river, and I laughed at him: What a mess! As a result, he quarreled with me, and I was angry: damn it, bring it on! He said: Who is afraid of who? Come here if you dare!

86. Can eggs from all over the world unite to break stones? ! So be realistic. ...

87. In the eyes of fools, the cleverness of smart people is worthless.

88. If something goes wrong, look for the reason from yourself first. Don't blame the earth for its lack of gravity when you are constipated.

89. If I have a pair of eyes that can shed tears, it is worthwhile for me to suffer in my life.

90. The girl I like should be as talented as Daiyu, as sensible as Baochai, as beautiful as Ke Qing, as generous as Xiangyun, as loyal as Li Wan, as capable as Tanchun, as smart as Xifeng and as blessed as Yuan Chun, hehe. ...

9 1. Calculate the salary increase, and you will find that you are even worse than a pig!

92. Come and spoil me with a girl!

93. I think I am a pervert. I have an Oedipus addiction and like the best mature women. Why else do I want to fuck her grandmother every time I see her face?

94. I don't know why, but I just like my brother's girl!

95. When the sky falls, you hug me!

96. Peacock tried to open the screen, but it showed its asshole!

97. My girlfriend and I are separated. In fact, our sex life is quite harmonious-I am impotent and she is indifferent …

98. Love is just one word, and I didn't do it once!

99. In order to cooperate with the successful completion of family planning work in China this year, I decided not to contact my brothers and sisters of the opposite sex for the time being. Thank you for your cooperation.

100. Don't wash it, but for the mud, this broken car would have fallen apart.