Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - History of short boys picking up girls
History of short boys picking up girls
1. Chu Jian
When my tutor interviewed me, I felt inferior for the first time, not because I was ignorant, but because I felt inferior in height. It was the first time I met Liu Qiaoyi, with long hair, fair skin and faint smile, and her height was above 165. I was in a trance, as if God had arranged this opportunity for me, but I couldn't help thinking about my height, and my heart was mixed. I can't convince myself to stay away from Liu Qiaoyi. She attracts me like a magnetic field.
There were five people interviewed that day, three boys and two girls. Although I was desperate, I made the following analysis: I and all the boys I know have seen them holding girlfriends on campus, which is really great news, and the number of competitors has decreased. At present, the key question is whether Liu Qiaoyi has a boyfriend, and the source of information is Wu Hong, a girl around Liu Qiaoyi. At this time, she is chatting with Liu Qiaoyi in full swing, and judging from her face, she is a gossip girl.
While I was wandering, the tutor called us to the office in turn and the interview began. When I went in, I saw five teachers lined up. Everyone is very serious, which makes me nervous. I have to get through this first, otherwise there will be no future with Liu Qiaoyi. Under the torture of five teachers, I used my brains, and Nyquist criterion, information entropy and frequency band transmission system were invited out one by one like old friends. Finally, under the teacher's "Rebecca" face, I noticed a smile. "Call Liu Qiaoyi in!" When I went out, my tutor gave me an order, and I was secretly happy.
"Liu Qiaoyi, you are next!"
"I'm a little nervous!" Liu Qiaoyi looked up and I saw that her beautiful eyes were full of anxiety.
"Don't worry, your grades are so good that you will definitely have no problem." I quickly comforted and silently thanked God for finally giving me a chance to talk to Liu Qiaoyi.
"Thank you." Liu Qiaoyi smiled at me, and my heart melted.
When Liu Qiaoyi was interviewed, it happened that I found the news. Wu Hong and I talked easily. She took the initiative to talk about her boyfriend and didn't need me to disturb her. She told me that Liu Qiaoyi's boyfriend has gone abroad, so Liu Qiaoyi is very lonely now. I silently thanked Wu Hong and made up my mind that if I succeeded, I would treat her to candy.
When we finally finished the interview in turn, the tutor solemnly told us to wait outside, and the teacher group should reach an agreement on our future. I have long ignored such an important event and was busy seizing the opportunity to chat with Liu Qiaoyi. Liu Qiaoyi was a little worried, so I began to open my mouth to comfort her and even tell her jokes. At this time, the tutor called us to the office. I feel that my tutor is a little disappointed. Can't you see that girl-picking expert is enjoying the spring breeze? The tutor solemnly announced to us that "after our careful discussion and screening, you all met the requirements and were admitted!" The five of us were very happy at first, but a feeling of being cheated came to our hearts. Anyway, my heart is ecstatic.
It is noon after the interview, and we are going to have dinner together. As a result, on the way to the canteen, three other people joined their boyfriend and girlfriend respectively. When they arrived at the canteen door, they suddenly found that it was just Liu Qiaoyi and me.
"Liu Qiaoyi, I invite you to the canteen today, even if we celebrate the success of the research!"
"all right."
Fortunately, I reacted in time and dispelled Liu Qiaoyi's embarrassment. The food in the canteen is still dull, but it seems like eating delicacies to me.
(2) First confession
Later, the five of us came out of the laboratory to go to the canteen together, and finally Liu Qiaoyi and I were left to have dinner together. Slowly, I began to deepen my understanding of Liu Qiaoyi. Her favorite American TV show is Friends, her favorite movie is The Shawshank Redemption, and her favorite little game is Nuggets. She is very competitive. If she doesn't do well in oral English class, she will be very unhappy and even cry. She is very kind. She will run around during the Wenchuan earthquake, collecting materials and donating money. She is very enthusiastic and strives to be a volunteer for the Beijing Olympic Games. She also has naughty times, bickering with me and laughing. I am also happy to fetch water for her, accompany her to the supermarket and buy her fruit. I feel very happy to be with her. Just when I was satisfied with this, a brother in the dormitory woke me up. "Are you being the blue face of Liu Qiaoyi?" I had a feeling of awakening in an instant, and confirmed by the way that "there is no pure friendship between men and women"!
New Year's Day is coming, which means that the annual dinner for 200 people in the laboratory will begin. I decided that it was better to have a long pain than a short pain, so I confessed to Liu Qiaoyi on the night of the dinner. In order to be courageous and stay awake, I drank three glasses of beer accurately. Looking up for Liu Qiaoyi, she sat quietly. I know she doesn't like such occasions very much. She saw me, too I waved to her and she got up and walked out with me.
It was very cold that day, and it was past nine o'clock in the evening. The place to eat is not far from the school. Liu Qiaoyi and I walk slowly. She obviously didn't feel anything, and as usual, she chatted with me sentence by sentence. My heart is churning, and I see that I have reached the gloomy road with poplars on both sides, which means that I will go to school soon if I don't confess. Let me quote my brother first.
"Liu Qiaoyi, brother wang said some things can't be in my heart. Just say it if you want. "
Liu Qiaoyi is a little confused about this unwarranted remark. I am like a strong person.
"Would you like to be my girlfriend?" I climbed my arm onto her shoulder. At this time, I really hate my height.
Liu Qiaoyi gently put my arm down first, and then said:
"Is it not good now?"
"What do you think of this? I don't think it is good at all. " I'm a little out of control.
Liu Qiaoyi said nothing but walked quickly. I seem to see those crows squatting on the poplar tree laughing at me.
(3) Second confession
The next day, Liu Qiaoyi told me through QQ, "We still won't eat together." I didn't reply, and I was lonely and angry. In order to avoid embarrassment, I deliberately postponed the meal time and let the four of them eat first. In this way, after two months, I experienced the darkest time in my life, and my optimistic personality no longer worked. When I recall over and over again that I struggled to climb up Liu Qiaoyi's shoulder, I think those three words "don't match". Just when I realized it was unrealistic, Wu Hong came to chat with me.
"How are you and Liu Qiaoyi recently? Liu Qiaoyi told me that you are still good to her. "
"Did she really say that?" My heart seems to be beating again.
"To tell you the truth, her ex-boyfriend came back from abroad two weeks ago and asked Liu Qiaoyi if she could go abroad with him. Liu Qiaoyi told me that being with him always makes me feel insecure. It's more comfortable to be with you ... "Wu Hong's mouth kept opening and closing, but I already ran out.
"Liu Qiaoyi, shall we meet?" I sent her a short message.
"Very good."
I waited downstairs in her dormitory, fidgeting. When I saw her coming down, I saw the white sweater and her tall figure, and then her beautiful eyes. When I take a closer look, it seems that her mouth is a little big and her lips are a little thick, but together they are the goddess I miss.
She smiled when she saw me. I took her to the most exclusive coffee shop on campus, and then I couldn't tell the difference between latte and espresso, so I ordered a cup of espresso casually. After I took a sip of black coffee, to be honest, I wanted to vomit, but I held back in front of Liu Qiaoyi and swallowed it. The opposite Liu Qiaoyi giggled, and I was embarrassed to scratch my head. I suddenly realized that Liu Qiaoyi and I are doing well at present. What can we expect?
"We are doing well now. Can we be the same as before? "
"What do you think? I don't think it is good at all. " I suddenly felt that this sentence was very familiar, and I regretted my recklessness at that time. Why can't I be patient? Now I can't even go back to the beginning.
In order to ease the atmosphere, I quickly changed the topic.
"Last week, I went to see Brother Zhou, who graduated. His home is being renovated. Originally, I wanted to buy a house and slowly decorate it into what I like. It's beautiful. "
"Do you need a hostess in your family?" I muttered something in my heart, what's the matter? In my intelligence, what Liu Qiaoyi is implying. But she doesn't mind my height? Just as I was imagining things, she repeated the question word for word. I woke up at once, so obviously I still can't hear you, and I'm a man!
"Yes, will you come?"
Liu Qiaoyi held out her hand and I gently took it.
(4) Follow-up actions
In this way, I graduated with her, saved money to buy a house together, decorated it like we liked, and had a little boy. Once I asked,
"Liu Qiaoyi, when I first confessed, did you not accept it because of my height?"
"Yes, I'm thinking that the next generation can't be too short!"
"Look, the boy is as tall as his mother, don't worry." I looked at my 2-year-old 95cm son and said.
"I'm not worried about the height of the child. As long as you inherit your optimistic and easy-going personality, any goddess can soak! "
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