Lightning joke title

It is said that when I was born, there was a piece of auspicious cloud in the northern sky, which drifted gradually from far and near, and floated to my home and became a word: handsome!

After seeing me, my father cried at the top of his voice for a month and a half. He killed a child who didn't believe it was mine. He rushed to my mother's bed several times with a knife and waved it to cut me into pieces. My mother protected me with death, so I can survive. Grandpa has been glaucoma for more than ten years, and he can't tell whether it's a man or a dog from a meter away. But when I appeared in front of him, the old man burst into tears and poked his eyes, saying that he didn't want to see anyone again, so as to avoid endless troubles. Later, in order to prove her innocence, my mother took my father to the hospital for paternity test. The doctor lifted the quilt, just watched me cry, wiped my nose and said, "Go home, this is not your son, nobody's." Humans can't give birth to such a handsome child. . . . . "

An intern nurse walked by and saw me. She immediately found a box of red inkpad with my fingerprints on it. Ben immediately spread out his hair and murmured to me, "Long hair is for you. If I don't marry you in my life, I'll comb my boudoir. . . . . "

I was afraid to go to school when I was fifteen. I haven't been to kindergarten for a long time. The children, teachers and dean in the whole park are crazy. My face was swollen by the little girl's kiss, and my aunts beat the child, among other things. Just because they were born in the same year as me, the military police sent out to quell the riot.

Once, I was so bored that I sneaked out of the house at night. If I see a female animal, I'm going to run away. Who knows that after I went out, I didn't catch up with her except for a scream. I looked back carefully and found that they all fainted on the beach. . . . .

The CCTV focus talk show came to interview me, and the person carrying the camera fainted three times. The little girl in charge of taking notes wrote Chinese in Italian and Spanish. When it was broadcast, because the TV station mosaiced my face, it was smashed the next day and slogans were posted everywhere.

The United Nations allocated special funds to build a hiding place for me, located at the top of Mount Everest in the Himalayas. The news is extremely sealed, and no one in the world knows where I am except my family and Secretary-General Annan. I like quiet, really quiet, the blue sky is close to me, and God is at my fingertips. I am quiet, but I am very bored. I stood on it and shouted, "I'm not handsome!" " "

Suddenly, a voice came from the sky: "No, you are lying. . . . "

God, can you lie to me? . . . . .

Many cancer patients (women) struggled for more than ten years before meeting me, and they became anti-cancer stars; Some disabled people (women) have lost their crutches and wheelchairs since they knew me for decades, and some even broke the world 100-meter record several times. . . . .

In desperation, the third world war broke out, and men used atomic bombs to maintain their dignity. . . . . After the explosion, I was the only one who survived in the world, because I was protected in the nuclear protection zone. When I came out, the land was deserted, and there was desolation and ruins everywhere after the war. . . . .

Suddenly, I found life on the ground!

That's a cockroach! Cockroaches have such a strong vitality that I didn't expect it. I picked up this cockroach and cried. Cockroaches tremble all over. I looked around and there was a cockroach at my feet! All women! !

On another coastline, all the male cockroaches are eyeing! ! !