Can you tell jokes? Expression package.

Watching on TV today, drinking causes cancer. I'm scared to death. Have a drink quickly to suppress the shock! From then on, I made up my mind: I will never watch TV again!

When I was in primary school, my teacher asked me to write a composition about housework, repeatedly stressing that it should be true. I don't know if everyone will ask for this. On Monday, the teacher asked a classmate to read. He read: after dinner, I will help my mother wash the dishes. My mother said to go away and play. I said the teacher told me to do it. My mother said that your teacher forced me to do so much ... This is the truest composition I have ever heard. # Interesting #

My boyfriend said that when he was in junior high school, he secretly smoked with his playmates near his home. Just two breaths later, his classmate exclaimed, "Your dad!" When my boyfriend saw it, he scared me to throw away my cigarette and felt that the whole world was dark. Then his father pointed at him angrily and scolded him, "You have no mercy! Have you been throwing away cigarettes for that long? ! "

After accepting bribes, the director asked his driver to send the money home and told him to keep it a secret. The driver put the money in his underwear pocket. When he arrived at the director's house, he asked, Is there anyone at home? The lady said: No! The driver said, that's good. Take off your pants at the same time. Mrs. Bureau asked in surprise: You? Don't mess around! The driver said, I'll pay. The lady said: I don't even give money. The driver said that the director called me. The lady took off her pants and scolded: "Bastard", this kind of thing can't be done by herself, and neither can the driver!

Yesterday, I heard a little boy who just graduated from a kindergarten class say happily, "I graduated and finally don't have to study." Boy, I really love you! # Joke #

When I was in middle school, I went to play with lesbians. I kissed her parents when they were not at home. It happened that her brother came back and saw them. 50 yuan was blackmailed by her brother and kept his mouth shut. When her brother left, he said, this is good, you should cherish it! It used to be 5 yuan, 10 yuan, and my brother was ashamed of you. "Say goodbye to troubles and be happy every day! ! # Interesting #

I moved to a new community today. I'm new here. Go downstairs and get close to the security guard, uncle Wang. Uncle Wang took me around. Suddenly, a pair of underwear, still lace, fell from the upstairs. This is not the climax. Uncle Wang smiled and picked it up, closed his eyes and sniffed it. He said to me, "It's Mrs. 502 in Building B" and instantly pushed it down. Anyway, I'm in contact with moving. # Interesting #