Please ask for the most, most, most, most... (100,000 words are omitted above) funny jokes. It’s hard for me to laugh. If anyone can make me funny, I will give him the best.

Super cute little jokes of the twelve zodiac signs

Aries

My mother often tells Aries: "Don't swing on the swing when wearing a skirt; otherwise, you will be kidnapped." The boys saw the little underwear inside!"

One day, Yangyang happily said to her mother: "I competed with Xiao Ming on the swing today, and I won."

Mom! She said angrily: "Didn't I tell you? Don't swing on the swing when wearing a skirt!"

Yangyang said proudly: "But I'm so smart! I took off the underwear inside, like this He won’t be able to see my underwear!”

(Brave, forthright, daring Aries)

Taurus

Melon vendor: "Come and eat watermelon, it's not sweet, no money required!"

Hungry Niu Niu: "Wow! That's great, boss, let's have something that's not sweet!"

(housekeeper, Want to have an affair but take care of your own Taurus)

Gemini

The mother asked both of them to get up: "Hurry up! The rooster has crowd several times!"

Shuangshuang said : "What does the rooster's crow have to do with me? I'm not a hen!"

(Gemini with strong self-awareness and independent thinking)

Cancer

Bus On the bed, Crab said: "I want to sleep with my mother tonight!"

My mother asked: "Will you sleep with your mother when you get a wife in the future?"

Crab and Xia did not hesitate. : "Yeah!"

Mom asked again: "What about your wife?"

Crab thought for a long time and said: "It's easy, let her sleep with dad!"

Mom: "!＠#＄%＾&＊(...—"

Looking at Dad again, my eyes are filled with tears!

(Oedipus Cancer (Cancer with complex and attachment)

Leo

The lion went to his grandma’s birthday party. When it was time to eat birthday buns, the lion asked: “Why do we eat something like this butt? "The birthday bag?"

Everyone's expression changed after hearing this.

Then Shishi opened the birthday bag, looked at the bean paste inside, and said, "Grandma, look at it!" There is a poop!”

Everyone was dizzy and vomited.

(A proud lion who feels for himself and is not afraid of others’ opinions)

Virgo

Fangchang was very curious about the belly button, so he asked his father.

My father briefly explained the reason why the umbilical cord connects the fetus and the mother's body, saying: "After the baby leaves the mother's body, the doctor removes the umbilical cord. I cut it off and tied it into a knot, and it later became the belly button."

Virtuous: "Then why didn't the doctor tie it into a bow?"

(A curious and perfectionist person. Virgo)

Libra (Princess’s constellation)

My father said to Tiantian: "There is no school today. Last night...your mother gave birth to two younger brothers for you. You Just tell the teacher."

Tiantian replied: "Dad, I only said that I gave birth to one child; I want to save the other one for next week when I don't want to go to school! ”

(Smart, weighing the pros and cons) Why didn’t I feel it

Scorpio

Scorpio just fell asleep when he was bitten by a mosquito.

Scorpio

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He got up to drive away the mosquitoes, but he couldn't get them out, so he pointed at the mosquitoes and said, "Okay, if you don't go out, I'll go out!" "As he spoke, he left the room, closed the door tightly and said proudly: "Humph! If I don't come into the house tonight, you will starve to death! ”

(Scorpio who doesn’t understand and doesn’t play by common sense)

Sagittarius

Xieshe: “Dad, why do you have so many white hairs?” ? ”

Dad: “Because you are not good, dad has a lot of white hair.”

"

Sheshe: ... (dubious)

Sheshe: "Then why do all grandpas have white hair? ”

Dad:!＠#＄%＾&＊(…

(Sagittarius who likes to think)

Capricorn

One day , Jie Jie went to the street with her mother; while walking on the road, it suddenly started to rain.

My mother took Jie Jie’s little hand and said, "It’s raining, run forward!"

Capricorn asked slowly: "Then it won't rain ahead!?"

(Capricorn understands the reality and is too lazy to change)

Aquarius

Ping Ping asked her mother: "Why do you call Mr. Jiang 'ancestor'?"

My mother said: "Because 'ancestor' is a name for the dead."

Ping Ping said: "Should the deceased grandma be called "Fresh Milk"?"

(An Aquarius who is born to be different and whose thinking is always different from ordinary people)

Pisces

Dad told Yuyu how he often went hungry when he was a child.

After listening, Yuyu had tears in his eyes and asked with great sympathy: "Oh, Dad, did you come to our house because you had no food?"

( Pisces, who is rich in compassion and regardless of the situation and the target)

After encountering gangsters, the twelve zodiac signs...

Leo: Hello!

Gangster: You have to give the money within three days...

Leo: Shut up! I tell you, you have 2 hours to put my family in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs, otherwise I will kill your whole family! ! !

(It seems... reversed)

Aquarius: Who are you looking for?

Gangster: You have to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs within three days, otherwise I will kill your whole family! ! !

(After putting down the phone, Aquarius immediately called the police. He is really the calmest zodiac sign)

Virgo: Hello!

Gangster: I...limit you to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs within three days, otherwise...

Virgo: Oh, okay! Ask my brother to answer the phone! Brother! Did you eat vegetables or not more than 200 grams of meat for dinner? Wash your feet after eating and wash your nails too! ! !

(The gangster on the phone is already sweating)

Pisces (cryingly): Who are you looking for?

Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs...

Pisces: Wow...Dad...Mom...Wow... Wow...

Gangster (also wanting to cry): Stop crying, uncle will buy you candy!

Pisces: Wow... I want my mother... I want my father... Wow...

Gangster (gritting his teeth and stamping his feet): Come on, I can’t let your whole family go. !

Aries: Hello!

Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs...

Aries: West Suburb? It’s better to go to the eastern suburbs! There@amp;(_)(*$amp;$amp;^##!@#!@$~!@#

(The gangster had already packed his luggage to travel to the eastern suburbs)

Cancer: Hello...

Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs...

Cancer: I Discuss it with dad!

Gangster: Your dad is in my hands!

Cancer: Let me discuss it with mom!

Gangster: Your mom is here too! In my hand!

Cancer: I will discuss it with my grandpa (grandma, uncle, aunt, brother, sister, uncle, grandma, grandpa)

Gangster: They are all in my hand! Here!

Cancer: Then me and...

(No way? Cancer is the only one in the family)

Taurus: Hello!

Gangster: Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs...

Taurus: Don't worry! I will arrive on time! Don't hurt my dog, it is a very important member of my family...

(Niu Niu, who loves family members, is so silly and cute, but the gangster is too stupid)

Gemini: Hello! May I ask you...

Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs...

Gemini: But why should I? Do you want to listen to me? Don’t you know that it’s not easy for me to make money? I started going to school at the age of six, and I didn’t find a job until I was 20. I still have to pass the probation period before I can make money...

(Please, The other party has already hung up the phone)

Libra: Hi!

Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs...

I believe you are not like that. You must be in trouble, right? Don’t lose confidence in life! I have 500 yuan here, take it first...

(The gangster was already moved to tears)

Scorpio: Please speak!

Gangster: You have only three days to put the money on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs. garbage can

Inside...

Scorpio: Well, okay! OK!

(The next day, when the gangster opened the trash can, he found a policeman inside. Behind him was a row of police cars. Scorpio took his family and waved to him not far away)

Sagittarius: Hello!

Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the trash can on the left side of X Street in the western suburbs...

Shooter: Can you be a little more efficient? Get your watch, I'll be there in 5 minutes! (Put down the phone and rush out of the room)

Gangster: I... I haven’t said the location yet...

Gangster: You have three days to put the money in the western suburbs In the trash can on the left side of the street...

Mogaizao: But I still have something to do... Let's wait another day!

Gangster: Hey - don’t hang up! Hello! Hello! …

It depends on which one you want, just think it’s funny