Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - I want to talk to you about the feeling of herding cattle. Is there really no pressure of life, no Jianghu routine?

I want to talk to you about the feeling of herding cattle. Is there really no pressure of life, no Jianghu routine?

"Suddenly there is a feeling that I want to herd cattle. There is no pressure of life, no Jianghu routine, no love and hate. I only care if my cow is still there. With my IQ, I only put two heads, and I can't count them. It eats grass and I sleep. " -Network

Summer is a good time to herd cattle. There are fresh green, green grass, green trees, green fields and green rivers everywhere. It was summer vacation, and our hearts suddenly became wild and extremely relaxed. We no longer have to worry about the homework to be handed in the next day, the texts to be memorized and the complicated mathematical formulas. Don't worry about letting cows come home late in the morning, being late for school and being late for school in the afternoon.

The best place to herd cattle in summer is Camellia Mountain. Every family in our country has camellia oleifera forest. There is no clear dividing line between forests. It may be marked by the folds of a tree or a mountain, and the result is continuous. Camellia oleifera is not too high or densely planted, and the light in the gap is good. In summer, the grass here grows more luxuriantly than other forests. Camellia oleifera mountain area is rich in pasture, which naturally becomes a good place for cattle grazing. Every day, we are calling our friends, and we gather at the intersection leading to the mountain. Some people don't have cattle companions at home, and when they see how much fun we are, they go herding cattle with us.

As long as we catch the cows up with Chashan, we can do what we like. At that time, the weather had become hot, camellia oleifera was bigger than the little finger, and the Woods smelled strongly of camellia oleifera, mixed with the smell of various plants. We picked a shady mountain meadow and several people got together to play cards. We are playing the upstream four-person race. Whoever goes downstream will leave temporarily and watch. It seems that there is little interest in playing cards without some rewards and punishments. We don't have money, and even if we do, we dare not gamble. We will decide who goes downstream and see where the cows graze, and punish who goes down to the fields below to eat seedlings. There are many boys playing cards, of course, girls also participate, but most girls like to gather together to learn knitting, which is finer and more varied than who plays. At that time, we were all young, about ten years old, and there were some older girls. We boys sometimes don't like girls of the same age to knit sweaters, so we tell some ironic jokes in strange language and deliberately ask cheekily, which one to give such a beautiful scarf? The thin-skinned will cry to us, and the wild will argue with us. We couldn't beat her, so we had to lose in despair. Those who have the courage will say that they are knitted for you, ask if they want it, and then give you a clod so that you can't run away.

There are also adults who go to herd cattle. What I remember most is my aunt who often shows off with his wife in the New Year. They both do everything together, even herding cattle. The villagers often tell their jokes, but there is a lot of jealousy and envy in their tone. When it rains, Changshuibo pulls peanuts in the field, and Nianxiu's aunt stands aside and gives him an umbrella. To cut firewood, two people must go up the mountain together and take turns to pick a load of firewood. In the villagers' words, two people just wear a pair of pants. When herding cattle, there is nothing else, one is holding the cow rope in front, and the other is catching the tip. When they got to the mountain, they couldn't help it, so they cut off the fern grass with the cowshed. One is pricking and the other is cutting. Go back, you choose a road, I choose a road, so as not to tire each other out. Years later, I still remember them. Now both of their children are married, but it is said that their marriage is not very good. The old man said, maybe their parents are too kind and do not love, and they have lost the happiness of the next generation.

It's very hot, and I'm a little sleepy and thirsty playing poker. Everybody put down poker and don't want to play. They want to find something to quench their thirst. At that time, people still attached great importance to the land. As long as they could plant something, they would never let the land go to waste. Now fertile land is overgrown with weeds, and few people in the younger generation have held a plow cangue. They don't know when to plant crops and have no feelings for the land. It has become their pride to stay away from the land.

Cucumber is the most planted in this season. We discuss whose house to steal. It's not easy to find, and even if we find it, it's easy to talk. Finally, I decided to steal from Aunt Shan Xiu's house. Her vegetable field is in the opposite ravine. Aunt Shan Xiu is warm and generous, hardworking and kind. It seems that her family can't eat all the food, and her neighbors eat her food. I met or passed by your door on the way and asked if you had anything to eat. If not, I'll give you two loofahs or a few eggplants or cut more than half a melon from the basket at once. Several of us crossed the mountain road to Aunt Shanxiu's vegetable field, and the cucumber rack was covered with cucumbers. We only pick hidden places, so it's not easy to see.

Everyone has a few in their pockets, but they dare not pick more. They couldn't eat any more, so they went down the mountain with a cucumber in their mouth.

Back in Camellia Mountain, cucumber is thirsty and in good spirits. We are divided into two factions, one is the Japanese devils and the other is the Eighth Route Army. They fight guerrilla warfare, wearing straw hats woven by fern grass and covered with green branches and leaves. A branch is our gun. The two factions are scattered in the Woods, each occupying a hill. Whoever occupies another mountain will win. Often play to the end, I don't know how many times I have died, and I am still fighting. The two factions shouted and fought, shirtless, some overturned and rolled down the hillside, and some climbed to the top of the tree and couldn't get down by themselves. After the fight, everyone was covered in sweat and the clothes on their faces were yellow mud. Last night, my fucking crotch was cracked again ... I don't know how to be scolded when I go back. Fortunately, there is an excuse to herd cattle, otherwise I am not sure that adults will use fir branches again (fir branches are full of sharp thorns, which are commonly used by adults to teach children "torture devices").

Looking at the sunset, the cow's stomach is round, and we are driving the cow on the way home. Some of them rode on the backs of cows with cucumbers in their mouths, and cicadas kept humming in the Woods on both sides of the road, so everyone sang in unison: "The shepherd boy rode on the cows and sang loudly. I tried to catch cicadas and suddenly closed my mouth. " On the way, you have to pass a wooden bridge, under which is a river two feet wide. Wet clothes are uncomfortable to stick to, so crossing the bridge is not far from home. We asked the girls to take the cows home by the way. Then we quickly tore off our clothes, because the bridge was not high above the water, so we plopped off the bridge and jumped into the river. The girl was embarrassed to see us, so she quickly raised her head and drove the cow home.

Jumping into the river, I felt a tingle all over, so cool! We fought in the water again, and the water splashed all over the river, giving off countless rays in the sunset, and we became happy and free fish.

At that time, the summer vacation passed so quickly. I often thought that it would be great if time could stay forever, but unfortunately it could not. After so many summer vacations, I have nothing, and teenagers don't come anymore. I became a salted fish on the shore.