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Two minutes joke

1.virtuemanyyearsaftereceivingmygradutedegree,ireturned othestateuniversityofnewyorkatbinghamtonasafacultymember。 One day, the elevator was crowded and some people complained about the low efficiency. Isaidtheelevatorshadnotchanged It's been 20 years since I started studying there. When the door finally opened, Ifeltacompassonatepatonmyback turned to toseeanelderlynunlingatme. "You'll get your degree, dear," she whispered. Persistence is a virtue. "After many years of graduate degree, I returned to new york State University in Binghamton as a teacher. One day, the elevator was too crowded, and some people complained that the elevator was too inefficient. I said that since I went to school there, the elevator has not been happy for 20 years? Take the lead. Finally, when the elevator door opened, I felt someone pat me on the back sympathetically. Looking back, I saw an elderly nun smiling at me. " "You'll get your degree, dear," she whispered. Perseverance is a virtue. "2. The difference of" ICANALWAYSTELLAGRADATECLASS "is observed by the instructor of graduate engineering courses at UCLA. When I said "good afternoon", the English teaching plan for the second year of college responded, "good afternoon". buthegradutausestudentjustwritetdown。 The teacher who gave our graduate students an engineering class at California State University in Los Angeles said it was particularly easy to distinguish between graduate classes and undergraduates. "I said' good afternoon' and the undergraduates answered' good afternoon'. The graduate student wrote down what I said in the notebook. " 3. Toolongthetraveleditofanews Paper called and said that she finally wrote an article a few years ago with an article. Whenever a writer dies, I know that I am a failure. "For too long, the travel editor of a newspaper called and said that she finally decided to adopt an article I wrote a few years ago. She wants to make sure that the tourist information is reliable. " "I want to make sure," she admitted timidly, "that you are still alive. Every time I find that the author is no longer alive, I know that I have been pressing the article for too long. "4. A few years ago, my father, Annette, went to new york. When the bill arrives, the reading and writing fee is $65438 +0.50. Dad paid the bill, including the expenses of read and Butter. In any case, the additional English jokes and Chinese translations are that he said such accusations were unnecessary. Attached is $500 in legal services. A man in the restaurant immediately called me and asked, "What is 500 dollars for our English jokes with translation service? Dad replied, "I never eat butter." . "$65438 +0.50 was returned. A few years ago, my father, a lawyer, took me to an upscale restaurant in new york. When the bill came in, it was $65,438 plus 0.50 for bread and butter. Dad paid the bill and the cost of bread and butter. But the next day, he sent a letter to the restaurant saying that the charge was unreasonable. I also sent you a bill of 500 dollars for legal services. The restaurant immediately called and asked, "What is this 500 yuan? We have never asked for the services of legal institutions. Dad replied, "I never asked for bread or butter." "1.5 dollars was immediately returned. 5. Sleeping pills and bubble gum can't sleep at night. He wanted to see a doctor, who prescribed some powerful sleeping pills. On Sunday night, Bob Tuck Pierce and Slipwelland woke up before hearing the alarm. He walked into the office and said his collection of humor and jokes: "I didn't get into any trouble this morning." "That's good," said the boss, "but where were you on Monday and Tuesday?" Sleeping pills Bob can't sleep at night. He went to see a doctor, who prescribed him some powerful sleeping pills. Bob took medicine on Sunday night and slept well. He woke up before the alarm clock went off. He came to the office, strolled in and said to the boss, "I didn't have any trouble getting up this morning." "good!" The boss roared, "Where did you go on Monday and Tuesday? A complete collection of English proverbs. Birds like to hear themselves sing. Have your own bread every day. God won't close one door, but he will open another. Everyone has his own destiny. Our destiny is in our own hands. The eagle catches flies. Big people don't care about small things. Eagles fly alone and flocks of sheep. Eagles fly alone, and sheep flock together. Early mistakes will lead to future troubles. Get up early, get up early. Sow early and reap early. Early start makes easy stages. Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.

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