Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Zhang Fei's story is urgent.

Zhang Fei's story is urgent.

Joke:

Liu Bei invited Zhuge Liang to talk about welfare treatment. Zhuge Liang said: I am a pair of dumb people today. If you can pair up, I will go with you. If not, then you don't have to come in the future. Liu Bei thought: What are these dumb people?

Zhang Fei thought to himself, it would be a pity if eldest brother can't get it right, so I'm right. I kill pigs, and everyone knows that I have no education, and I am not ashamed of being wrong.

So the dumb pair began: Zhuge Liang pointed to the sky and Zhang Fei pointed to the ground; Zhuge Liang stretched out a finger; Zhang Fei held out three fingers; Zhuge Liang high-fived three times; Zhang Fei high-fived nine times; Zhuge Liang drew a circle on his chest; Zhang Fei patted his head, and the dumb couple ended. Without saying anything, Zhuge Liang packed his luggage and followed Liu Bei.

After a long time, Liu Bei asked Zhuge Liang who won that day? Zhuge Liang said: General Zhang won! Liu Bei asked again: What did you say? Zhuge Liang said: I mean the sky, the upper knowledge of astronomy, and he means the earth, the lower knowledge of geography; I stretch one finger to represent national unity, and he stretches three fingers to represent the three kingdoms; I clap my hands three times, representing three to three, and he clap his hands nine times to represent nine to nine; I draw a circle on my chest, which means I have a bright heart. If he pats his head, it means my head is dry!

Liu Bei met Zhang Fei. Q: I said Zhang Xiandi, who won the dumb contest that day? Zhang Fei: Of course I won.

Liu Bei: What did you say?

Zhang Fei: The Prime Minister probably knows that I have killed pigs before, so he asked questions around pigs. At first, he pointed to the sky, which means the weather is very good today. I said I was just going to catch pigs in the field. Does he mean catching pigs? I can't say, how to catch three bites, one bite is not enough to kill, he let the pig catch 30 pounds? What I said is wrong. 30 kg is a pig, and a big pig should weigh at least 90 kg. He asked again, are these pig hearts and pig intestines sold together? I patted my head and told him that as long as you have money, I will sell this pig head to you.

Historical events in Changbanpo:

In 208 AD, when Liu Bei retreated, he sent Zhang Fei to inspect the rear. Zhang Fei called more than 20 riders to stand on Dangyang Bridge, and Cao Jun arrived. Zhang Fei broke the bridge by water and shouted at Cao Jun, "I am Zhang Yide, but I can come to * * * to die!" Cao Cao Jun was afraid of Zhang Fei's bravery. Although few people saw Zhang Fei, no one dared to go, so Liu Beijun was safe.