Urgent! A one-man New Year's Day funny program

In the past, the teacher handed out examination papers, and the girl in the back took an extra one and shouted, "Teacher, I have it, I have it". As a result, the boy sitting next to him said, "it's mine, it's mine."

2. In junior high school, the teacher asked someone to translate "Who is this man"? A classmate translated: Whose man is this? The whole class laughed and the teacher was speechless.

3. Yesterday, someone said to introduce me to a girlfriend. I wanted to ask "Is it beautiful", but it turned out to be "cheap"? Hate yourself to death.

4. I wanted to drink soda that day. I wanted to say a bottle of soda to the owner of the cold drink stand, but when I saw the beer in front of me, I was so anxious that I said, "Every time the boss comes, he has a bottle of fart water."

5. I remember one time I went to KFC with my friends. When I was waiting in line, I mumbled something, a chicken leg burger and a pair of chicken wings. It was finally my turn. I wanted to say "Miss, a chicken leg burger", but it turned out to be "calf, a burger". The whole audience laughed.

6. My friend told me that KFC had a new "flesh and blood connection" and asked me to invite her to eat. It was the hot weather in those days that I was groggy and went to the restaurant. I smiled at Miss KFC and said, "Please give me two bloody/thank you!" Be ashamed of oneself.

7. When boarding the plane for the first time, the flight attendant greeted me at the door of the cabin. When she saw me coming in with a ticket, she asked, "Which seat are you in?" I replied, "I am Libra, and you?" The stewardess replied, "I'm Scorpio. I asked which seat you were in."

8. When I was a child, TV series Hunt and Rogue Tycoon were shown, and an old lady in the courtyard said, "Hunt the Rogue is on tonight." I hope these can help you.