What jokes do big fish like to eat?

Question 1: To solve a joke, I can't understand that there was a big fish and a small fish. One day, the little fish asked the big fish: Big fish, big fish, you usually talk slowly, so the big fish said that it likes to eat slow-talking fish and only wants to eat that little fish.

Question 2: Is it more energy-saving to delete games, mobile QQ, pictures, * * *, dictionaries, etc? There are more plain text (text) messages. You can't save power, but if it is dynamic memory like Nokia, it will increase the processing speed because of the release of memory, thus indirectly saving power.

If there is space in the dynamic memory, it can certainly store more, but it seems that the machine has the highest storage limit for pure text (text) messages. I have never tried to make the machine so full, and then it will become a waste of electricity.

Question 3: Once upon a time, there was a big fish and a small fish. One day, the little fish asked the big fish: big fish ~ big fish ~ you ~ flat ~ often ~ happy ~ happy ~ eat ~ what ~ Yao ~ ya. Because big fish like to eat small fish that talk slowly, the sooner the small fish can talk, the better! It is normal. Knowing this, you will be reduced to, oh, sauce purple.

Question 4: Liu Xin told a joke before. There seems to be something that wants to eat an animal and says what it likes to eat. . . . I don't know if you want one: there is a small fish in the sea. One day, he met a big fish. He said to the big fish, "big fish ~ big fish ~ you ~ happy ~ eat ~ what ~ ah ~" The big fish said, "I ~ happy ~ eat ~ talk ~ slow ~ small ~"

Question 5: There was a joke in the former Soviet Union: Ivan, a farmer, caught a big fish in the river and happily went home and said to his wife, "Look, our answer is C.

This topic examines the harm caused by Stalin's model to agriculture, that is, the disadvantages brought by agricultural collectivization.

Question 6: Young Ed Bloom: Sandra Templeton, I love you and I want to marry you.

Little ed? Bloom: Sandra? Templeton, I love you and I will marry you in the future.

-

Senior Ed Bloom: The truth is, I've been thirsty.

Big ed? Bloom: Actually, I've been thirsty all my life.

-

Young Ed Bloom: Sometimes a man needs to fight, and sometimes he needs to accept that fate has been predestined, the ship has set sail, and only fools will continue. The truth is that I have always been a fool.

Little ed? Bloom: Sometimes men need to fight, and sometimes they need to admit that they have completely lost. The ship has broken down, and only a fool will continue. In fact, I have always been a fool.

-

Senior Ed Bloom: You will be surprised.

Big ed? Bloom: You'll be surprised.

Will Bloom: Really?

Will. Bloom: It's me?

Senior Ed Bloom: Having a child will change everything. Diapers, burps, midnight feeding.

Big ed? Bloom: Having a baby can change everything. Diapers, burps, getting up in the middle of the night to feed.

Will Bloom: Have you done all this?

Will. Bloom: Did you do all this?

Senior Ed Bloom: No. But I heard it was terrible. Then you spent several years trying to correct and mislead the child, making him full of nonsense, and the result was still good. Love? Bloom: No. But I heard it was terrible. Then you spent several years corrupting and misleading the child, making his mind full of nonsense, and the longer the child, the more perfect it is.

Will bloom: do you think I'm ready?

Will. Bloom: Do you think I will be like this in the future?

Senior Ed Bloom: You learn from the best.

Big ed? Bloom: You learn from the best people.

-

Advanced education b>>

Question 7: Why does the fish only remember for seven seconds? The little fish asked the big fish, "Mom, why do they say that the goldfish's memory is only seven seconds?"

The big fish said, "What did you say just now?"

The little fish said, "What?"

Question 8: Ask the complete version of the joke. Sichuanese jokes are so funny!

Joke 1

Sparrows and crows form a dragon gate array together.

The sparrow said, what kind of bird are you?

The crow said: I am your phoenix!

Sparrow: How can a phoenix be as black as your turtle son?

Crow: You know shovels. I'm a Phoenix sulfur-burning boiler. -

Joke 2

One day, when we were discussing how tall Yao Ming was, Sichuan PLMM, who usually likes to wrangle next to me, wrangled again: "How tall is Yao Ming? There is a man in our hometown who is much taller than him. "

"who?" We asked in unison.

"Leshan Giant Buddha", she said proudly. -

Everyone fainted, and two people with glasses even fell down. ...

A GG was unconvinced: "No more than 70 meters ..."

But it was interrupted by this Sichuan MM: "Is it only more than 70 meters?"

Another man said confidently, "It's 7 1 meter."

"So, you people don't even know some basic common sense." This MM plausibly said, "People are sitting at 7 1 m, how can you stand up?"

Everyone fell to the ground. ...

"You let him stand up!" This GG is still unconvinced

"Well, people have been sitting on the river for more than 1000 years, and they have been arthritis for a long time. Try it for a few years if you have the ability! " They were completely speechless. ...

Joke 3

A teacher's homework for his students is to make sentences with "pleading" and "demanding". -

After the exercise book was handed in, one of them answered all his life: Yesterday my mother stewed a pot of pig's trotters. When it was not ripe, my father ate a piece and said, "Please don't move."

Mom said, "I ask you to chew!" " " -

Joke 4-

The plane shook violently.

Joke 5-

There are many people on the plane. Some people are carrying snakeskin bags, some people are carrying live chickens and ducks, and the security inspector is sweating: "Back to back, you have to make up the ticket. You are overweight and old." "Why? Last time two sacks of potatoes made me cut too old. " Another passenger leaned in and said, "Come on, brothers, have a cigarette. Look at my live chicken bag. If there is no room in the cabin to tie them to the wings of the plane, these balls will be old. Anyway, they can fly by themselves, without consuming the oil of the plane ... "

Zaizai was repaired by his father. He ran to his mother to complain: "Mom, what would you do if someone hit your son?" Mom: "I want to avenge his son!" " "Aberdeen:" ... "

An old lady can't read, but she likes listening to the radio. The weather forecast must be heard every day. One day at dinner, I asked my family, "I have a question." Do you know where it is? It rains almost every day there. "

6. A little mouse on the cliff waved its short front paws and jumped down again and again, trying to learn to fly. The mother bat next to her looked at it and said anxiously, Dad, don't tell it, it's not ours! ()

7. My friends and I went to the top of Mount Tai to watch the sunrise. A friend pointed to the sky and said, "I see it!" " "I saw it too!" At this time, someone in the distance came out with trousers and scolded: "See it when you see it!" " What are you yelling about? "

- -

1. Ghost: God, next time I want to be as white as an angel with wings, but I still want to suck blood.

God: Then reincarnate as a nurse.

2. A friend sold popsicles in the park for the first time, so he was embarrassed to shout. Then suddenly someone shouted "sell popsicles ~ ~ ~ sell popsicles ~ ~". Hearing this, my friend shouted happily, "Me too ~ ~ Me too ~ ~".

Ants and elephants died soon after they got married. While burying the elephant, the ant wept bitterly: "Dear, why did you leave so early?" I will bury you if I don't do anything else in my life! " "......& gt& gt

Question 9: What kind of jokes do girls like? Girls like humor and make fun of it. Remember not to bring yellow ones. For example, a foreign driver asked the traffic police for directions in Maoming, and the traffic police in Maoming replied, "If you drive to the left, it will be 5,000 Wuchuan, drive to the right, and then drive 6,000 Luchuan for a while, and there will be no road. If Lu Mei keeps walking, she will cut her neck in Zhanjiang! The driver was so scared that I didn't want to leave. Traffic police: You ordered Maoming, and the driver almost peed his pants, begging: Boss, can I turn around and go back? Traffic police: If you turn it over, you will die. You will die.

Sparrows and crows form a dragon gate array together.

The sparrow said, what kind of bird are you?

The crow said: I am your phoenix!

Sparrow: How can a phoenix be as black as your turtle son?

Crow: You know shovels. I'm a Phoenix sulfur-burning boiler. -

Joke 2

One day, when we were discussing how tall Yao Ming was, Sichuan PLMM, who usually likes to wrangle next to me, wrangled again: "How tall is Yao Ming? There is a man in our hometown who is much taller than him. "

"who?" We asked in unison.

"Leshan Giant Buddha", she said proudly. -

Everyone fainted, and two people with glasses even fell down. ...

A GG was unconvinced: "No more than 70 meters ..."

But it was interrupted by this Sichuan MM: "Is it only more than 70 meters?"

Another man said confidently, "It's 7 1 meter."

"So, you people don't even know some basic common sense." This MM plausibly said, "People are sitting at 7 1 m, how can you stand up?"

Everyone fell to the ground. ...

"You let him stand up!" This GG is still unconvinced

"Well, people have been sitting on the river for more than 1000 years, and they have been arthritis for a long time. Try it for a few years if you have the ability! " They were completely speechless. ...

Joke 3

A teacher's homework for his students is to make sentences with "pleading" and "demanding". -

After the exercise book was handed in, one of them answered all his life: Yesterday my mother stewed a pot of pig's trotters. When it was not ripe, my father ate a piece and said, "Please don't move."

Mom said, "I ask you to chew!" " " -

Joke 4-

The plane shook violently.

Joke 5-

The plane was buzzing with people, some carrying snakeskin pockets, some carrying live chickens and ducks, and the security inspector was sweating: "Back to back, you have to make up the ticket. You are overweight and old." "Why? Last time two sacks of potatoes made me cut too old. " Another passenger leaned in and said, "Come on, brothers, have a cigarette. Look at my live chicken bag. If there is no room in the cabin to tie them to the wings of the plane, these balls will be old. Anyway, they can fly by themselves, without consuming the oil of the plane ... "

Zaizai was repaired by his father. He ran to his mother to complain: "Mom, what would you do if someone hit your son?" Mom: "I want to avenge his son!" " "Aberdeen:" ... "

An old lady can't read, but she likes listening to the radio. The weather forecast must be heard every day. One day at dinner, I asked my family, "I have a question." Do you know where it is? It rains almost every day there. "

6. A little mouse on the cliff waved its short front paws and jumped down again and again, trying to learn to fly. The mother bat next to her looked at it and said anxiously, Dad, don't tell it, it's not ours! ()

7. My friends and I went to the top of Mount Tai to watch the sunrise. A friend pointed to the sky and said, "I see it!" " "I saw it too!" At this time, someone in the distance came out with trousers and scolded: "See it when you see it!" " What are you yelling about? "

- -

1. Ghost: God, next time I want to be as white as an angel with wings, but I still want to suck blood.

God: Then reincarnate as a nurse.

2. A friend sells popsicles in the park for the first time ... >>

Question 10: Ask for a lot of cold jokes and hot jokes! The last one added more than 100: cold joke: just learn. ...

Next: the most popular joke of 20 10 ...

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Joke [picture] laughs to death. Don't look for me!

Full of jokes

1. Once upon a time, there was a man named Shuang.

He is dead.

On the day of the funeral.

His family cried and said

Cool ... cool. '

Passers-by are puzzled. Asked, "What do you like?"

The family cried:' Great ... awesome! !

Seven years after graduation, I finally accepted a big project to build a 30-meter chimney, with a construction period of two months and a cost of 300 thousand, but it needed funds. It was finally finished at the end of last year. Today, people went to check and accept, and they were scolded to death, and they still had no money. Shit! The drawings are upside down, and people are going to dig wells!

3. A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by to watch, and a policeman came over: What's the matter? Drunk: I don't know. I just arrived.

The doctor asked the patient how the fracture happened. The patient said, I felt sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes with a telephone pole. A fucking * * * passed by and thought I was electrocuted, so he grabbed a stick and gave me two sticks!

One day, turtle's father, turtle's mother and turtle's son decided to go for an outing. They brought a Shandong pie and two cans of sea water.

Chicken, and then set off for Yangmingshan. After ten years of hard work, it's finally here! They sat on the floor and unloaded their equipment accurately.

Prepare dinner. Turns out I didn't bring a can opener!

Son of a turtle: "... I'll go back and get it." 」

Father Tortoise: "Good son! Come on! Mom and dad are waiting for you to come back for dinner. Go back quickly! "

Tortoise son: "Be sure to wait for me! Don't break your word! "

So turtle son set foot on the road home. ...

Time flies, time flies, 20 years have passed, but the turtle son has not appeared yet.

Mother turtle: "wife ... do you want to have dinner first?" I'm so hungry, I said ... "

Tortoise Dad: "No! We promised our son! Ok ... wait for him for five years, or let him go! "

It's been five years, and the turtle son still hasn't seen it. Tortoise parents don't care! Parents decided to start.

Take out the pie and get ready to eat. ...

Suddenly, turtle son poked his head out from behind the tree. ...

Turtle son: "Shit! I knew you would steal! Trick me into getting a can opener? I waited for 25 years, and finally.

I have been waiting for you! I hate being cheated!

Xiao Xin: Dad, why are there three gold medals in my name?

Dad: You are short of gold in your life, so you are named Xin, just like some people are short of water, so you are named Miao, and some people are short of wood, so you are named Sen.

Xiao Xin: Dad, what do you think is missing from Sister Guo Jingjing's life?

8. The tortoise is hurt. Let snails buy medicine. Two hours have passed and the snail hasn't come back yet. The tortoise was in a hurry to scold: if I don't fucking come back, I'll die! At this time, the snail's voice came from outside the door: * * Besides, I'm not going!

9. Someone raised a pig, annoyed him and abandoned it. However, the pig knows the way home, and it is useless to abandon it. One day, he drove a lot of cars and abandoned the pig. He called home late at night and asked, "Is the pig coming back?" Answer: "I have come back!" " It growled, "put it on the phone, I'm lost!"

10. Elephants accidentally stepped on an ant nest, and their nesting ants climbed onto the elephants. The elephant shook its body and the ants fell down. At this time, there was another elephant around its neck, and the fallen ant shouted "strangle it".

1 1. One morning in computer class, a row of classmates' computers crashed. So a classmate stood up and said, "Teacher, the computer crashed, and our platoon was all dead." At this time, many students said, "We are dead, too." Then the teacher asked, "Who else is not dead?" Only one classmate stood up and said, "I'm not dead yet!" " "The teacher said strangely," the whole class is dead. Why don't you die? "

12. Before monkeys eat peanuts, they should be stuffed with * * * before taking them out. The administrator explained: Someone once fed it peaches, but the peach core could not be pulled out. The monkey is afraid. You must measure it before eating now.

13. Xiaoming: "Dad, am I a stupid child?"

Dad: "Silly boy, how can you be a silly boy ..."

14. Tell a story: "Once upon a time, there was a eunuch ................"

Someone can't help asking, "What's next?"

Continue to tell the story: "Below? No ... "

15. There was a man ... >>