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Joke joke

1, confession

A boy has a crush on a girl for a long time. One day in the self-study class, the boy secretly handed the girl a small note that read, "In fact, I have been paying attention to you for a long time." After a while, the girl sent another note, and the boy opened it anxiously. "Please don't tell the teacher, I promise I won't eat melon seeds again." . . . . . The boy looks stupid.

2, bugs

Sleeping and playing with my mobile phone, there has been a bug flying on the screen. After pressing it for a long time, my wife said, "What are you playing? Give me the next one. " I took her mobile phone and turned off my screen, and the bug was successfully attracted to her mobile phone screen. I handed it to her and said, "Just one life, save it."

3. Damage friends and girlfriends

I once quarreled with my boyfriend and cried on the phone. My best friend came to comfort me. Suddenly, he stared at my eyes. A sentence pops up: "What brand of mascara do you use? You didn't cry like this. " I was so angry that I threw away my cell phone and stopped crying.

4. Xiong Haizi

Yesterday, I scolded my son for something, saying that your mother is a pig and you are a pig. But my son said to me: Dad, why are you so bad? You married a pig and gave birth to a pig! You said you were Xiong Haizi. I thought you were looking for a fight.

5. blind date

At the blind date, she and Kan Kan talked about how her ex-boyfriend drove a luxury car and lived in a mansion. She often praises how beautiful she is, and she gets nervous at the sight of her.

He looked at her: "I, I usually look and see beautiful women, and I will be too nervous to speak." She gave a snow-white smile: "Your way of chatting up is really old-fashioned." "But, but when you see something that doesn't look good, you will stutter." The woman's face immediately turned into pig liver color.