Why do rural families insist on a boy?

Why do people in rural areas have to have a boy?

A: People in rural areas used to like boys. Even in the era of strict family planning, if the first child is a daughter, they have to secretly regenerate with a fine to have a boy. Why do they do this? There are certain reasons.

First of all, in the past, rural areas needed labor with good physical strength. For example, there are many manual jobs in rural areas, such as plowing and harrowing fields, building houses and roof tiles, carpenters and masons. And many heavy children can't do it. The nature of agricultural production at that time decided that a boy was needed at home.

Then there is the family line, which continues the ancestral incense. No one can deny that having a son in the countryside is a large part of the reason. As the old saying goes, "There are three unfilial things, and then it is great" has been circulating for a long time. No one wants to be ruined by his family and bear the "blame" of unfilial.

There is also a question of face. There used to be many families, so they had influence in the village. Vulgarity means that they are not afraid of being bullied by others.

There is a serious preference for boys over girls in rural areas. Although great changes have taken place in rural thought, the feudal thought of favoring boys over girls in rural areas is deeply rooted. Moreover, the traditional consciousness of raising children to prevent old age has already penetrated into the hearts of every farmer and cannot be eliminated in a short time. Rural people generally believe that raising children to prevent old age. They realize that their son belongs to their own family and their daughter belongs to someone else's family. Daughter will get married sooner or later. After marriage, she will have another family, and her son will always accompany her. The old man has worked hard to raise his children. His daughter will get married in her twenties and become her husband's family, but her son can always serve her until her later years.

Because of these traditional ideologies, rural people have to have the idea of boys.

But now this traditional concept has changed a lot, and most people have stepped out of the idea of having a boy; Especially the one-child generation, boys and girls are the same. People's scientific understanding has also improved. Boys and girls have the same blood relationship.

Chairman Mao put forward a long time ago: "Times are different, men and women are the same, what gay men can do, so can lesbians." . Lesbians hold up half the sky. In China today, there are no lesbians, no female cadres, no female company managers, no female doctors, no female teachers, no female pilots and so on. No, the female astronaut "Wang Yaping" flew into space like a male astronaut and roamed the universe proudly. ……

Now some people in the countryside don't want to have more boys. With the increasing number of singles in rural areas, this is not only a problem of imbalance between men and women at present, but also because having more boys will increase the economic burden of families. As far as the countryside is concerned, it costs a lot of money to marry a daughter-in-law, with a house and a car, and a sky-high bride price. There is also a jingle in the countryside: "Having a daughter is a bank, and having a boy is China Construction Bank". Now in the countryside, people with two daughters are very happy, and people with two sons are very tired.

In the past, boys were born in rural areas to raise children and prevent old age. However, today's generation of young people has fierce social competition and great pressure on their lives. Boys, in particular, should not only make money in big cities, but also run families and take care of their children's education. Therefore, it is difficult for their energy to be both loyal and filial. So now there are many left-behind elderly people in the countryside.

The subject asked, "Why do people in rural areas have to have a boy?" ? This statement is no longer applicable to the development of this society, and people have dispelled this idea ideologically. Now I don't care about the sex of the child. Boys and girls are all the same. Boys and girls are the darling of their parents, and they are treated equally and loved equally.

After thinking about this question, let's answer it objectively. Most rural areas still rely on labor to make a living. One more son, one more labor force when he grows up, and a family. Correspondingly, there will be one more portal at home.

There are three kinds of unfilial, and the last one is the biggest. I didn't have a son in my hometown before, and I felt inferior and humiliated, so I have to have a son no matter how hard and tired I am.

It's different now. The concept of carrying on the family line has faded. It would be much better to have a daughter. Now even in rural areas, the traditional concept of unfilial is gradually fading, and no one laughs without a son. Even families with sons envy families without sons, because there is no need to consider building a house for their sons in the village, especially buying a house in the city. Rural parents are under great pressure.

Or influenced by traditional ideas. Think that family property needs men to inherit. Even some rural people will feel that it is a shame not to have a boy. In fact, boys and girls are all the same, as long as they are filial. Now many boys don't live with their parents after they have a home and a house. I haven't been to that house for months. On the contrary, girls ask for warmth every day and send anything to their parents at the first time. Others are envious. Personally, as long as you are filial, it is good to have boys and girls.

I was born in the 1970s, and my parents gave birth to two daughters for my sister and me. My father changed jobs and went to work in the county, while my mother worked at home. At that time, there was a serious preference for boys in rural areas, and anyone without boys would be bullied and looked down upon by the villagers. When my sister was born, my mother wanted to give her away, but when someone came to hug her, she couldn't bear to cry and forgot about it.

My mother does all the field work at home. When I was young, my mother was very capable and never needed help. At that time, the countryside was proud of having more children. Just like our family, sometimes people bully us, even my uncle and grandmother bully us. I didn't know much about it at that time. All I know is that my mother will cry when she comes home after quarreling with others. Now that I think about it, it's not just sad.

Later, when we moved out of the countryside, life got better and better, and my mother slowly put it down.

At the age of sixty-five, my father had a cerebral infarction. My mother and I waited in the hospital for two months. I once went to the first floor to do magnetic vibration. At that time, there was no elevator in the old hospital in the county, but my father couldn't walk. I gritted my teeth and moved my father from the third floor to the first floor step by step. I was 53 kilograms. My father is worried about my weight because of illness. I am still too tired to carry him downstairs. I'm afraid my mother will feel bad and want to show myself in front of her.

Later, my father recovered well, suffered from the sequelae of decline and lived an ordinary life. Ten years have passed, and my parents and mother are very healthy. I am very grateful to God for giving my daughter the kindness of her parents.

Not only in the countryside, but also some city people insist on having a boy. There are many reasons.

First of all, influenced by traditional ideas, boys have always been the inheritors of surnames and incense, and sons have always followed their own. Although the daughter is also a close relative of the same flesh and blood, she will marry when she grows up, and the children born will follow her surname.

Therefore, in the eyes of many rural people, only sons are descendants and can be passed down from generation to generation. The so-called "unfilial has three sons, and no posterity is great" is also the truth.

In the countryside before, it was all manual labor. The son can charge ahead, but the daughter can't do some farm work, such as plowing cattle and plowing fields, and transporting manure by cart. Many large agricultural machinery in modern times were also operated by men.

The countryside pays attention to how happy it is to have more children. If Bi Jing has more sons, there will be more labor, and the power of the family will be strong. After the son got married and got married, he was able to keep up the show.

A son can be calm and calm in the face of major events, but he doesn't panic. Otherwise, why is he called a man with indomitable spirit? However, it is difficult for a daughter to do it at a critical moment. First of all, my daughter is timid, psychologically fragile, flustered and hesitant. I say this not because of the physical and psychological differences between men and women. Of course, many daughters are better than sons.

If you don't have a son in the countryside, you will feel stiff and unable to lift your head. You don't have the strength to speak, and you may even be looked down upon and bullied behind your back. What's more, you will be described as a "homeless person".

For example, our son goes to the grave on holidays, and neither son nor daughter goes to the grave, but no one goes to the grave after the death of her daughter, which is what people call broken incense and no heir.

Therefore, rural people should insist on having a son even if they are desperate.

Remember me, after my mother got married, my grandfather once asked my mother for something, arrived at my door, sat on the stone bench at the gate and curled up there? Sadly, I asked him to go home and rest, but he didn't reply to me, just sat there persistently. In fact, I know he didn't tell me, because he mentioned the water poured by his married daughter many times. I don't think he would have come to my home, let alone come into my home, if he hadn't come to see my mother for something. I still remember that once I pointed to my grandfather holding two photos taken by my brother and asked my father why he didn't hold me for a photo. I forgot what my father said at that time, but when I grew up, I understood, because I am not a boy anymore.

Slowly, I grew up. When I was in junior high school, I did farm work. My father asked me to push the cart outside to push cement in the greenhouse. I tried my best, but I didn't push the horse deep into the soil. I still remember my father's coldness about the usefulness of having a daughter. I always hated myself, too. Why girls? Last time I went home, my neighbor's sister-in-law gave birth to three babies. When I went to see her, she looked sad and unhappy, but I didn't ask much or think much at that time. When I got home, I told my father. I said my neighbor's sister-in-law was lucky to have three girls. Father firmly said that she would have four children. What if she doesn't have a son? I didn't refute it, because I knew that the thoughts of the older generation were engraved in their bones, because their predecessors told them so, not only in words, but also in actions. So I understand that rural people are obsessed with having children.

I sometimes think that when we are around, no one will think that it is a sin not to have a son, no one will think that a daughter is inferior to a son, and no one will think that a married daughter is a spilled water. I don't think rural people would have this idea at that time.

The traditional concept of filial piety is deeply rooted in social morality, especially the feudal traditional consciousness of three unfilial, which is still eroding people's thoughts. You should know that girls who are going to marry sooner or later in the traditional concept are not backward, so no matter how many girls you have, you still have to carry the cauldron of unfilial without boys! The pressure is too great to lift your head! Especially in economically and culturally backward places!

Then the traditional marriage custom is that the woman goes to the man's house, which brings great inconvenience to the woman's parents to support the elderly. As for individual men marrying into a woman's house, there is a special name for men called husband, which is despised in custom. As the old saying goes, a boy can't change his name and surname. That's right, so it is quite difficult for a family without boys to marry their own daughter because of the influence of traditional customs. As for the rest, because time is limited, I won't nag any more.

Because the boy is strong, he can support his family in the future.

Alas, there is too much work in the countryside. I can't do it without boys. Pick a home to live in. Men are more useful than women. For example, water the land. Take medicine. Harvesters collect wheat and so on. Everyone needs someone to worry about at home. There are no boys at home. Suffer from anger and suffering. This is the case in our hometown village. There are also serious feudal ceremonies in rural areas. No boy said that your family doesn't eat human fireworks. So many people want boys.

The more backward the place is, the more serious the patriarchal ideology is. But there is nothing wrong with the idea of having a boy. The most terrible thing is that people who are very bad to their daughters after giving birth to boys sacrifice their daughters for their sons. A daughter is always an accessory of her son, and she has never paid any fatherly love and maternal love for her daughter. However, most people's preference for boys comes from women. All mothers-in-law want their daughters to have sons. Why should women be embarrassed? Do women really have to reflect on whether the concept of son preference is caused by women or men?