Laugh till your feet are soft. Tell some jokes.

Wife: Ten o'clock.

Husband: Is it complete?

Wife: It's too early. No one else is sleeping!

Husband: I mean ten o'clock sharp?

Wife: Eleven o'clock then.

Husband: Shit, I asked you if it was 1 0 sharp.

Wife: Damn it, the hour is 1 1. It's not good for you not to fuck me for a day, is it

Husband: I'm just asking, is it 1 0 sharp?

Wife: fix it, fix it now! ! ! ! !

There are two conditions for a woman to get married and make friends.

1. Be handsome.

2. Have a car

The computer went to help her search the results of ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ chess.

The woman refused to accept the search results and entered them again.

1. There is a beautiful house.

2. There is a lot of money

The computer went to help her find the bank again.

The woman is still not disappointed, continue to input conditions.

1 should be cool.

Feel safe again.

Results The search results are ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Altman

The woman is still not disappointed, continue to input conditions.

1. Be handsome.

2. Have a car

3. Have a beautiful house

4. There is a lot of money

5 keep calm.

6 and feel safe.

The computer went to help her search again ~ ~ ~ ~ Altman played chess in the bank.

Funny SMS jokes between husband and wife

Wife: If I cut this hairstyle, will it be ugly? Husband: No! Wife: Really? Husband: Yes! Your ugliness has nothing to do with your hairstyle. The wife said to her husband: When Empress Dowager Cixi was buried, she had a big pearl in her mouth. What should I include to face in the past 100 years? The husband said: tribute pills or mothballs?

Wife: Remember in February, you said that you and Lao Wang went fishing for carp? Husband: Of course I remember. Wife: A carp called just now and said that you have become a father.

When a person went to the toilet and just closed the door, he listened to the next door and asked, "Are you there?"

He said, "Yes."

But I thought to myself, who is this next door? Do I know him? Strange!

Then the next door asked, "What are you doing here?"

He said angrily, "Shit! What can you do here? ! "

The next door asked, "When are you leaving?"

He thinks this man is crazy! He said with chagrin, "Let's go after pulling! ! "

At this time, the next door asked, "Why don't you come to me later?"

The man was surprised: "Shit! It turned out to be gay! "

He cursed: "Go to hell, pervert!" "

The next door said, "well, hang up first and call you back." There is an idiot next to me! " What did I say? He answered! !

Teacher A was correcting an English composition when he suddenly flew into a rage: "I have never seen such a poor English composition."

Teacher B asked, "What is it?"

Teacher A: "Write a story about a prince and a princess."

"not bad," said B.

"He actually wrote from the beginning that the prince asked the princess,' Can you speak Chinese? "

The princess replied, "Yes",

The rest are all in Chinese.