Little torch humorous story cold joke hero

Once upon a time there was a man named Shuang. He is dead. On the day of the funeral. His family shouted, "Cool ... so cool. Passers-by are puzzled. Asked, "What do you like?" The family cried:' Great ... awesome! ! "This ..." Wende's eyes drifted into the distance, where more evil orcs gathered, where intensive gunfire came from, and five marines were trying to meet in one place. Looking at the scene over there, it is obvious that the situation has reached a critical moment. Once upon a time there was a man named Shuang. He is dead. On the day of the funeral. His family shouted, "Cool ... so cool. Passers-by are puzzled. Asked, "what do you like? The family cried:' Great ... awesome! ! 'URL ':' \/\/zhidao . Baidu \/s \/wowen 12？ Fr=qbzt '， 1。 One day, there was a fudge walking in the street. As she was walking, she suddenly said, "Oh, dear! My legs are so soft! " 2. Once upon a time, there was a man named Yu. One day, he was hungry and ate himself. . . There is a man who looks like an onion and cries when he walks. There is a hide-and-seek club, and the head hasn't been found yet. 5. Xiao said to Xiao B: Dig the plug ... it's raining outside! ! Excited to see Xiao B: Yes, I saw you. 6. Once upon a time, tomato A and tomato B went shopping together, and then one day suddenly a truck rushed out and crushed tomato A, and tomato B pointed at tomato A and laughed [hahaha, ketchup ~] 7. Xiaoying borrowed a pen from Xiaoming, but Xiaoming didn't. Xiaoying: I would die if I borrowed it ... so Xiaoming lent his pen to Xiaoying ... After a while, Xiaoming died ... 8. One day, three trash cans were walking ............. in the street. They walked side by side in the order of big, medium and small ... The small trash can said to the trash can in the middle, "Brother, why don't we walk faster?" The trash can said, "This is about to ask Big Brother!" " So, the trash can said to the big trash can, "Brother, why don't we walk faster?" "The big trash can said impatiently," I see! " "After a few more steps, the big trash can suddenly stopped. It said to small and medium-sized trash cans: "We are trash cans. How can we walk? " 9. There is an old lady in a mental hospital, dressed in black, squatting at the gate of the mental hospital with a black umbrella every day. The doctor thinks that to cure her, we must start with understanding her. So the doctor also dressed in black, with a black umbrella, and squatted there with her. VMdv was silent for a month ... The old lady finally said to the doctor, I'm sorry. -10. Three white rabbits picked a mushroom, and the two big ones asked the small ones to get some wild vegetables to eat together. The youngest said I wouldn't go, so I left, and you ate my mushrooms. The two older ones said no, and the white rabbit went to ~ ~11. Half a year has passed, and the older one said he couldn't come back to me. Let's go ~ ~12 A year has passed, and the rabbit hasn't come back yet. There is no need to discuss the two major issues. Let's eat. At this time, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out of the nearby jungle and said angrily! I knew you wanted to eat my mushroom ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~14. One day the little penguin went to play with the polar bear! Three years later, I went to the equator. I remember, the door at home was not closed. It was three years before he went home and closed the door. Then, six years later, at the North Pole, I knocked on the polar bear and said, "Polar bear, I'm coming to play with you!" " As soon as the polar bear opened the door, he took a look at the penguin and said, "Let's go to your house to play!" " 15. A college student was caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, where are you from? I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me! The college student replied to the enemy's words and was electrocuted. He said, I'm from TV University! 16. Xiaoming got a new haircut and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged and ran outside to cry. . Cry, cry. . He flew. . 17. My girlfriend invited me to her house to watch a movie. After arriving at her home, she wrote the word "movie" on the wall with a pen, and we both sat on the toilet and watched it. 18. Xiaoming: "A fox ate a fruit and became another animal. What has it become? " Ruobing: "I don't know." Xiaoming: "civet cats, of course." 19. What about Xiaoming? He will have an exam tomorrow, but he is watching TV in the evening. Xiaoming's mother asked anxiously, Have you read all the books? There will be an exam tomorrow. Xiao Ming replied brightly: Mom, I finished reading it. Xiao Ming's mother praised Xiao Ming happily: Good boy, then you must do well in the exam tomorrow. Xiao Ming cried and said, Mom, I mean,' Mom, I think it's over'. 20. The little snake asked Brother Snake in a panic .. "Brother, are we poisonous?" The snake said, "Why do you ask?" The little snake said, "I accidentally bit my tongue just now." 2 1. One day, I was walking on the road and suddenly felt hungry, so I ate myself. 22. One day, chocolate and rice cakes fought, and chocolate pushed the rice cakes into the sea. Ten years after ............................................................................................................... ... the woman was waiting in Fukang Garden with a diamond ring, but the man didn't show up. The man was waiting in Fukang Garden with flowers in his hand, but the woman didn't show up. The reason is that one of them is in area A and the other is in area B. The woman thinks that the man has changed his mind, so she is very angry. She ran to the seaside and threw away the diamond ring. Thirty years later, the man became an old man. One day, he was fishing at the seaside and suddenly caught something that shocked him. Do you know what that is? ..... is actually a rice cake pushed into the sea by chocolate 30 years ago. 23. Why is the penguin's belly white? Because he can only reach the front with his short hands. 24. You said: I love you 52 1+ and said: 365 results every day = 886 25. Qian Feng: You know another name for the tiger. Everyone: I don't know! ! ! Qian Feng: Another name of the tiger is Dandan. Everyone: Why? Qian Feng: Because he is eyeing (the tiger is Danny). Everyone:- 26. Qian Feng: One day, five good friends went shopping and suddenly a billboard fell down, killing three people. Why? Everyone:? Qian Feng: Because this is a billboard of McDonald's. 27. Q: One day, the disgusting mother cried in disgust. Why? A: Because it's disgusting! ! 28. A man is climbing a rock. When he was about to climb to the top of the mountain, a wolf tried to burn the rope with a burning candle. The man said a word and the wolf blew out the candle. The man said, happy birthday! 29. Adult diapers, type a person's name. Bao Qingtian (Mr Bao) 30. Xiaohua, did you use my pencil? Xiaohua: No, I'm useless. Bug: Are you really useless? Xiaohua: I'm so useless! Bug: Alas, you are the17th person to admit that you are useless. Who is the coolest with 3 1.26 letters? A: C is the coolest, because suit pants (C is cool) 32. 0~9, which two numbers are the brightest? Answer: 1 and 3, because flashing (1 3 1 3) is flashing ... 33. If there is a carriage carrying a prince and a princess, may I ask: Whose carriage is this? Yes, because there is a carriage ... 34. Wang Han: "The tea is cold." Ou Di: "No, Qian Feng didn't tell cold jokes. How can tea be cold! " Ou Di nudged him and said, "Xiaofeng, let's have a cold joke. "。" Q: In Spartan, 800 people took part in the war, but in the end only 300 people took part in the war. Why? A: Because 500 Wu Bai went to sing. 36. Once a group of young scientists came, a Beijing baby said that his family had five poisons, and spiders were weaving webs by the bed. Then Qian Feng said, "One good thing is that there are no mosquitoes ..." A cold wind blew, and Wang Han and Ou Di immediately got out of the way and said that they would come to interview you alone. Qian Feng walked up to the little scientist and asked coldly, Are there any mosquitoes in your house? 37. In the first phase of the college entrance examination star class, two girls were admitted to Fudan Mathematics Department, but they all said that their dream was to make a movie. Wang Han: I'm sorry for the teacher in Fudan, but our children in Hunan are like this. They were admitted to the Department of Mathematics, but their dream was to make movies. Qian Feng: Now it's not a digital movie (cold! . . A boy said his nickname was jolin, and everyone began to think about the reason. Wang Han: Is it because the vegetables have grown taller, so it's called Jolin Qian Feng: I know, because it's 1.90 meters, so it's like a cold wind blowing, and the boys keep nodding wildly (dude, you know me ~ ~) 39. Wang Han: "Turn around 3630. Qian Feng: "Wow, it's hot!" 40. A psycho got a pistol from somewhere. He walked in a black alley. Suddenly I met a young man, and the mental derangement pressed him to the ground without saying anything, pointing a gun at his head. Q, what is one plus one? The young man was frightened and pondered for a long time. Answer, equal to two. The psychopath killed him without hesitation. Then he pulled the gun in his arms and said coldly, you know too much … %D%A