Ask for 5 jokes that can make people laugh!

1. Once upon a time, there was a stupid son-in-law.

One day, his father-in-law came to visit, and his father was just about to go out of town, so he taught him a lesson.

If your father-in-law asks you, "How do you manage these cows and horses in the yard so well?"

Just say, "Why should little animals mind!"

If he asks you, "Who is in charge of the family business?"

Just say, "My little husband can't control my dad!"

If you ask about the painting on the wall, say, "This is a famous painting by Tang Bohu."

And told him to praise it again before he left.

Father-in-law came, he saw and asked:

"Where's your father?"

Answer:

"Little beast why mind! ! "

Hearing this, the father-in-law thought it was wrong and asked again:

"What about my daughter?"

Answer:

"The little husband is incompetent and the father is the master."

Hearing this, his father-in-law was very angry and drank and scolded:

"What did you say?"

He was very happy and said with confidence:

"This is Tang Bohu's famous painting! ! "

2 the difference between being lonely for seven days and not coming home at night

One night, a woman didn't come home. The next day, she told her husband that she had slept with a female friend. Her husband called her best friend 10, and they didn't know about it!

A man didn't go home to sleep the next night. He told his wife that he slept with a brother, and his wife called his best friend 10. Eight good brothers confirmed that his husband slept in their house … ..

Two others said, "He has her husband!"

A netizen's reply:

I showed this post to my wife yesterday. I didn't expect her to be in high spirits. I immediately called my friend and asked if I was there. As a result, I can imagine that I once again demonstrated the above point of view! What's even more ridiculous is that a buddy actually said that I was drunk and sleeping at his house and asked my wife if she wanted to wake me up to answer the phone. After hanging up the phone, the buddy's phone immediately called my mobile phone. As soon as I got through, he shouted before I could speak: Where is it? Hurry home. Your wife is looking for you. I said you were drunk at my house ... don't forget to drink before you go back ... After the phone call, I looked at my wife and was silent. ...

Children sit at home and eat. The cat came up to him, mewing. The child threw a piece.

The meat was given to the cat, and the cat ate it and Mimi.

The child threw it another piece, and it ate it and called it "Mimi".

The child was angry, stood up and said loudly, "You sit in my seat and make me Mimi."

Whew, you give me meat to eat! "

Pupils are telling a story: "A cat becomes a tiger when it sees a mouse, but it becomes a tiger when it sees a tiger."

Turned into a mouse ... "

He's human. What does this "but" mean?

He wanted to think, replied:

"This is an animal bigger than a cat and smaller than a tiger."

In the street, a little girl walked up to an uncle in police uniform and looked her up and down.

, carefully asked:

"Are you a policeman?"

"yes."

"Mom said that no matter what difficulties she encountered, she would get help from the police. Yes

Really? "

"Yes!"

"Well," the little girl raised one foot, "please help me tie my shoelaces."