Ask for 50 super jokes

.

A male deer

,

It's walking.

,

Walk faster and faster

,

Eventually it became a road bus.

(

deer

)! ! ! !

2

.

Two tomatoes crossed the road and a car sped by. One of them could not avoid being squashed, and the other tomato pointed.

Smiling at the squashed tomatoes, I said, dig hahaha, ketchup.

…

three

.

The wolf said:

"

I will eat you!

!

!

"

Guess what?

As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.

Yes

four

.

The stone and the rice cake fought, and the stone flew and kicked the rice cake into the sea.

…………

Once upon a time, there were two lovers who had private lives.

,

But boys need to do military service.

,

I made an oath to that girl.

,

To a girl.

diamond ring

,

And promised to meet that girl three years later today.

,

Arrive and wait

,

That ring is a wedding ring.

.

This is not easy.

three

year

It's gone

,

Girls have been waiting for boys.

,

But I can't wait.

,

She's so sad.

,

In desperation, she threw the diamond ring into the sea.

,

Go a long way

foreign country/land

.

but

,

The boy has been waiting for the girl.

,

but

,

Girl's mistake

Know the appointment place

,

So it will be forever.

regret

.

Boys are heartbroken.

…

A few years later

,

Boys go fishing.

,

Guess what he caught.

New Year cake; rice cake

! ! !

five

.

Is jiaozi a boy or a girl?

Answer: Boys, because jiaozi has a foreskin.

six

.

There is a duck named Xiao Huang. One day, he was hit by a car. He shouted:

"gung!

"From then on, he became Xiao Huang.

Melon material

! !

seven

.

The matchstick suddenly felt itchy, so I stretched out my hand to scratch it and burned myself to death.

…

eight

.

Once upon a time there was a bird.

He passes through a cornfield every day.

But unfortunately,

One day, a fire broke out in the cornfield.

All the corn has turned into popcorn.

After the birds fly by,

……

I thought it was snowing, so I froze.

…

nine

.

When will Taiwan Province Province be reunified?

When buying instant noodles

10

.

Asun and appa have nothing to talk about, telling each other that time waits for no man.

Asun:

"

Recalling my childhood, I like Children's Day best.

"

Apa:

"

Youth Day is in ten years.

"

Asun:

"

Father's Day is in ten years.

"

Apa:

"

In a few decades, it will be the festival for the elderly.

"

Asun:

"

Decades later.

. "

Apa:

"

Tomb-Sweeping Day.

"

A German, a Frenchman and a Japanese are going to work in the mine.

The boss is American. He said to the Germans:

"You have a good physique, and you are responsible for coolies.

」

Say to the French:

"You said you were an engineer, responsible for the mining plan.

」

He said to the Japanese:

"You are very thin. It's your call.

Consumables (

supply

)

」

Then every other week, they start to work.

A few days later, the Germans and the French found that the Japanese had disappeared. After searching for a long time, they decided to go back to work first.

When the Germans started to work, the Japanese suddenly jumped out.

Shout out:

1

Five yuan was kidnapped by a criminal gang, so I called the hundred-dollar bill:

"

Hey! Your son is here, so if you don't want us to kill him, trade yourself for him!

"

One hundred dollar bills thought for a moment and said:

"

Tear it up, tear up your company.

five

No money!

"

2

A man was starving in the desert when he found the magic lamp.

Magic lamp:

"

I can only give you one wish. Hurry up, I'm in a hurry.

"

Personnel:

"

I want a wife.

……"

The magic lamp immediately conjured up a beautiful woman, and then said dismissively:

"

I am hungry and greedy for beauty! Pathetic!

"

Then he disappeared.

Personnel:

"……

Cake.

"

three

The earthworm family was bored that day, so the little earthworm cut himself in two and went to play badminton.

Mother earthworm thinks this method is good, so she cuts herself into four sections and plays mahjong.

Father earthworm thought about it and cut himself into minced meat.

Earthworm mother cried and said:

"

Why are you so stupid? You will die if you cut so hard!

"

Earthworm father said weakly:

"……

Suddenly want to play football.

"

four

, Panda Man

QJ

Panda girl, panda girl fought hard and vowed not to give up.

Panda man said angrily after the failure:

"

We're going extinct!

"

five

The Tortoise and the Hare

......

The rabbit quickly ran to the front.

......

The tortoise saw a snail crawling slowly.

......

tell him

：

Come up and let me carry you.

......

then

......

The snail climbed up.

......

soon

......

The tortoise sees another ant.

......

tell him

：

Come up, too.

......

So the ants came up.

When the ants come up,

......

Look at the snail above.

......

Said a sentence to him

：

hello

Do you know what the snail said?

Snail said: hurry up, this turtle is so fast.

.......

six

There is a man and a woman eating.

Girls keep asking boys: Do you love me?

The boy glanced at the girl and went on eating dinner.

The girl was very angry and asked, Do you love me or not?

The boy finally said: love

The girl asked again, then how do you prove it?

Suddenly, the boy took out 30 yuan money from his pocket.

Ask a girl.

：

Do you have ten yuan?

The girl gave the boy ten yuan.

......

The boys put forty yuan on the table.

soon

.....

The girl was very angry and asked the boy, Do you want to prove that you love me?

The boy said: I have been proved! Forty is just around the corner!

seven

Go to the snack street one day

Find a store that sells egg towers

Every one looks delicious. I want to buy one to try.

I asked the clerk

：

Excuse me, is this sold separately?

Salesperson

：

No, it's Japanese.

eight

One day, a family caught fire.

Mom and dad both fled, leaving only one son inside.

Mother was very nervous and shouted outside:

"

son

.....

What are you doing?

......

They're all on fire. They're not coming out yet.

......"

The son replied:

"

I am wearing socks.

....."

Mom said again:

"

What socks do you wear in case of fire?

...."

After five minutes, my son hasn't come out yet.

......

Mother shouted nervously again:

"

Son, what the hell are you doing? appear

~

It's all on fire. It's still in there.

....."

The son said:

"

I'm taking off my socks.

........

"

nine

A man went fishing by the river.

First he wore a leaf ~ no fish took the bait for a long time, then he changed a piece of bread ~ no fish took the bait for a long time ~

He had no choice but to change earthworms ~ and there was still no fish for a long time ~ ~

In a rage, he quit.

100

Renminbi (RMB)

Fell into the water and cursed:

"*—

%#%

Eat what! Buy it yourself!

!

!

!

"

10

A German, a Frenchman and a Japanese are going to work in the mine.

The boss is American. He said to the Germans: You have a good physique and you are in charge of coolies.

Say to the French: You said you were an engineer and you were in charge of the mining plan.

He said to the Japanese: You are very thin. It's your call.

Consumables (

supply

)

Then every other week, they start to work.

A few days later, the Germans and the French found that the Japanese had disappeared. After searching for a long time, they decided to go back to work first.

When the Germans started to work, the Japanese suddenly jumped out and shouted:

「

Surprise!

」

1 1

、

"

I can't see things too far away,

"

The patient said to the ophthalmologist.

"

Please come with me,

"

The doctor took the patient outside, pointed to the sun in the sky and asked:

"

What do you think that is?

"

"

The sun.

"

The patient replied.

"

Then how far do you want to see!

"

12

One day, the animals smelled an unpleasant smell in front of Guan Gong Temple.

The snake said: I am too young to fart so smelly. It must be a cow.

The cow said: I eat grass, and I won't fart so smelly.

The pig said: People who fart will blush.

Suddenly, Guan Gong rushed out and drove the pig away, saying, How many times have I told you, I was born blushing.

13

One day, a man met God.

......

God suddenly kindly gave the man a wish.

......

God asked

......

Do you have any wishes?

......

The man thought about it.

......

I heard that cats have them.

nine

Article life

......

Then please give it to me.

nine

Wenzhang life bar

......

God said,

......

Your wish has come true.

......

One day, the man was idle and bored.

......

If you want to say death, forget it.

......

Anyway, there is.

nine

A life.

Lying on the tracks.

......

As a result, a train passed by.

......

That man is still dead.

......

Why is this?

Because the carriage of that train

10

festival

......

14

One day, three people came to the funeral home. Strangely, their smiles after death.

^_^ ......

The administrator of the funeral home was puzzled and asked

police

: Why did their faces become?

^_^

And then what?

police

Say: this

......

it's a long story

......

Look at the man on the left.

......

He and his wife are on a spring night.

......

In the most enthusiastic

at that moment

......

Unable to stand

......

put asid

The administrator replied, alas.

......

May I die among the flowers.

......

Ghosts can't do it.

......

How did the one in the middle die?

police

: The one in the middle.

......

He ...

......

This is a human tragedy.

......

He is walking on the road.

......

Suddenly I heard myself hitting my head.

colour

......

bonus

seven

a

..

When he smiles happily.

.......

Only to be hit by an oncoming car.

......

result

......

put asid

......

The administrator replied, alas.

......

He is really not blessed to enjoy the rest of his life in splendor.

......

And then the remaining one

And then what?

police

......

It's a little sad that this one is dead.

......

He was hacked to death by thunder while climbing a tree.

The administrator replied:

......

This is a bit wrong. Why do you laugh when you are struck by lightning?

......

police

Said: because he felt after climbing the tree.

.....

Suddenly there was a flash of lightning.

......

He thought

......

Someone took a picture of him.

......

15

Thousands of years ago, both male and female dogs were squatting when urinating.

It was not until the Tang Dynasty that things changed.

……

Everyone has heard of Emperor Taizong! His old man keeps a pair of Beijing dogs. On one occasion, Emperor Taizong went to Huashan to worship heaven and brought this pair.

Go ...

……

Halfway through the sacrifice, the bitch suddenly felt anxious and ran behind a tree to solve it.

This is a very disrespectful act when offering sacrifices to heaven, which angered the jade emperor.

The Jade Emperor ordered Lei Gong to hit a thunder.

Hit the tree to the right,

The tree fell,

Crushed that bitch,

The male dog was very scared when he saw it.

……

From then on, every time the male dog urinates under the tree, he will put out a foot and push it hard against the tree.

In case the tree falls down by itself.

……