How to "reduce the burden" on children?

The first step of decompression: take good care of your child's health.

1. Keep regular sleep and eating habits at ordinary times.

If there is a change in diet and sleep habits under pressure, you should pay attention to and consult your doctor whether this is still within the scope of your child's health.

2. Regular and scientific physical exercise

It can strengthen children's physical endurance in the face of stress and reduce the physical reaction caused by stress. Running, dancing, walking, gymnastics, cycling, etc. Can stretch the main muscle groups. Therefore, if the child only likes static games, remember to pull him to listen to music and move, or go outdoors regularly during the holidays.

The second step of decompression: care about children's emotional feelings.

1. Encourage children to express their emotions with "language" instead of "action"

Use "I am unhappy" and "I am angry" instead of throwing things and physically attacking myself or others. If children need to use their bodies to release their anger, punching sandbags and running are all strategies that can be adopted.

Parents should understand that the release of emotions is an important step in stress management, and accumulating too many emotions will only cause a heavier pressure burden. Rational problem-solving model can only play an effective role after the safe emotions are released-which is one of the reasons why we often think that children "know" what to do, but they still can't do it.

2. Make a "worry list" for children and parents.

If there are many plans and arrangements in your child's life, make a list of events with your child (weekly or daily) and analyze the importance and priority of the events. When you are finished, cross these events off the list and give yourself a positive dialogue.

3. Develop positive dialogue and humorous language and thinking habits.

If children are found to have negative self-conversations, such as "I can't, it's so hard" and "everyone hates me", they can be guided to respond to themselves in other ways, such as "It's really hard, but I can try" and "Some people hate me, but more people like me". Watch comedies and listen to funny jokes with children, and cultivate the thinking habit of self-deprecating but maintaining self-esteem and self-confidence and seeing things from different angles.

The third step of decompression: clever life management

1, arrange a rest time, and give your child a hug and a little encouragement during the study break.

We should not only set appropriate goals in course study, but also give appropriate expectations in life adaptation. Some children are very adaptable to unfamiliar situations, but some children need long attention and preparation period. We should clearly know the advantages and limitations of children's characteristics and abilities, and provide them with challenges to life instead of impossible burdens.

Spend a short time alone with your children every day, even if it's only 10 minutes. During this time, give him complete autonomy and acceptance, and let the children decide their own activities during this time.

Finally, and most importantly, parents also need to properly handle their own stress, and don't treat their children as pressure vents or therapists. If possible, adjust your workload, simplify the time with your children, try to avoid bringing home the fatigue and pressure of work and company, and find a buffer time and space between the company and home. Children can also understand parents' pressure. Parents can demonstrate how to express their emotions, feelings and thoughts, but don't leave your questions to children. Children can't afford to be their parents' confidants and helpers, which will only make them more helpless because they can't help.

2. overcome the pressure.

Appropriate pressure can motivate children to work hard. Without pressure, people will be tired and lazy, but too much pressure will make children physically and mentally unbearable and produce psychological problems. Research shows that primary and secondary school students are generally tired of learning, anxious about exams, cheating, and adolescent troubles. Many students also have the problems of being withdrawn, lazy and willful.

Parents have the responsibility to help their children overcome psychological stress. Psychologists point out that parents are the most important influence force for teenagers. Here are three suggestions for parents, which I believe will help alleviate the psychological pressure of children.

3. Listen to your child.

To help children overcome stress, we must first understand what psychological pressure children have and where the pressure comes from. So be sure to listen to your child carefully, spend time talking face to face with your child, look at your child attentively and listen to him carefully. In this way, you can know the real situation of children's psychological stress and help them solve problems.

4. Help children face their fears

Sometimes children are laughed at because they are different from others, such as not playing truant with others, smoking, copying homework and so on. Even isolated, afraid and at a loss. At this time, parents should teach their children to stick to principles, never do anything wrong, and let them know that it is not easy not to go with the flow. This is a mature and brave performance.

Children share their experiences together.

Parents must have encountered similar situations when their children were young. How to deal with them at that time or what problems they have encountered now can be shared with their children in easy-to-understand language. When children know that their parents often face pressure and troubles, what they say to their parents is easier to listen to. Parents tell their children how to deal with stress, which actually sets a good example for their children and enhances their courage and confidence in overcoming stress.