Find a 3-person sketch about the Olympics

"Olympic Volunteers"

1: Judges 2: English classmates 3: History classmates 4: Sports classmates

1: The motherland is becoming increasingly prosperous and powerful, and people's lives are The Olympic Games are getting better and better, and the Olympic Holy War is about to begin. Contribute your meager strength. You want to ask me what I do? I am the judge tonight, here to select Olympic volunteers.

Ladies and gentieman, let us welcome the three Olympic volunteers with warm applause!

The music started and 234 three people entered the room one after another to introduce themselves.

2: Hello, everyone! My name is yin chao qiang, today I com here to ruo for the volunteer of the O... My name, as the name suggests, is super strong in printing, super strong in printing, and super strong in English. powerful!

3: Good evening everyone! I miss you so much... My name is Stepbon. Stebon. Stebon. The history is great! OH YE!

4: Oops, it’s amazing, I have so many fans here! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your support over the years. When I encountered difficulties, it was you who never gave up and I was able to be where I am today! What? You still don’t know what my name is? My name is Shen Tihao. Shen Tihao. Shen Tihao.

The body is good!

1: The names of these three people are interesting. Seeing that you are so good, I really want to choose all of you!

234: Good YE!

1: Don’t get excited, I mean I want to, but there is only one spot, I want to choose one of you

234: Want me, want me, I If you are good at English (I am good at history and I am good at sports), you can choose me

1: Okay, okay, you should compare with each other, and I will decide who to choose in the end

2 : Let me go first. Everyone knows that English is the best tool to communicate with foreigners. How can you do it if you don’t understand English in this era? There is a joke about a classmate who was in class. The teacher asked, Student Shi, do you know what HOU ARE YOU means?

3: This is simple, what does HOU mean, ARE means yes, and YOU means what you mean. When combined together, doesn’t it mean what you mean?

2Laughs: So what does HOU OID ARE YOU mean?

3: OLD means old. Isn’t it obvious? What does this sentence mean: Why are you always the same?

2 Laughing: If you don’t understand, you just don’t understand. Don’t make any nonsense. Let’s talk about it. His English is not good. Can he be a volunteer?

3: Come on, stop showing off in front of me. Isn’t your English very good? Then let me ask you, do you know the name of Yue Fei's father?

2: How do I know this? YOU ASK ME, I ASK WHO? You'd better ask him directly

3: This shows the terrible thing about bad history. Everyone knows that Yue Fei's mother is called mother-in-law, so isn't Yue Fei's father the father-in-law?

2: Father-in-law?

3: Hey, this kid is so sensible.

4 waved his fist to demonstrate: If you continue to argue, be careful of me!

1 Hurry up and pull away 4: Don’t be impulsive, this is a national live broadcast, be careful about your image! You must never use other people's bodies to punish your own fists...

4 stared at 1, 1: Of course, including my body

4: I didn't mean that, If I don't do this, they will really start fighting

23: Aren't you just relying on your own body? What’s so amazing

4: Can I volunteer if I’m not in good health? Seeing how thin you two are, if you help a foreigner carry a bag, such a big bag (gesture with your hands) will become unbearable after a short time. Do you think you are helping the foreigner, or are you asking the foreigner to help you?

23 was about to speak, but was stopped by 4: A hundred years ago, the country was corrupt and the people were weak. The great powers gave us the title of "Sick Man of East Asia". Now, the country is rich and strong, and the people are rich. Now that we are strong, do we still have to bear this heavy name? I want to tell foreigners through the Olympic Games that we are still the descendants of the dragon, but China is no longer the China it used to be!

1 Applause: Good! You three are all very good, but this is really difficult for me to handle. It is simply more difficult than hosting the Olympics! Well, dear audience friends, the competition has reached a fierce stage. Let us wait and see who will win in the end! I am now asking you personally, 2, you go first

2: Then I go first, Buddha said, if I don’t go to hell, who will go to hell? Come on

1: How old is the Olympic Games?

2: This...this...has been 4*29 years, which is 116 years of history

1: The answer is wrong, the correct answer is 112 years

< p>3: You don’t know such a simple question. Go back and study history. Education should start from childhood. You will know at a glance that you did not study well when you were a child.

1. Ask me

1: You are very courageous. How many gold medals are there in the Beijing Olympics?

3: I am No. 3, so let’s take 300 yuan.

1: Wrong answer. Why do I feel that the number of gold medals follows you?

3: Hey, that’s a compliment! Then 301 yuan?

1: The answer is invalid, the correct answer is three hundred...

4 rushed to say: 302 yuan... Just ask me this question directly

1: Okay, please take the move

4 quickly got into a fighting position. 1 was frightened and stepped back: What are you doing?

4: Didn’t you say you would accept the move? Come on!

1 Back off: I want you to take the question! Please answer, if you want to thank someone, how do you say it in English?

4 Anxious... 2 Remind him: thank you!

4: Three, three, three pieces of meat!

1: Is this Shen’s English? Quite a gentleman... (23 was secretly having fun)

1: Next is the rush answer question. I said you should rush answer after the start, no fouls. Please listen to the question. When and where did Liu Xiang break the world record in the 110-meter hurdles?

4: I know, the record was broken in the 110-meter hurdles at the IAAF Super Grand Prix Lausanne in the early morning of July 12, 2006

1: Congratulations.

4: Little CASE

1: I’ve learned how to answer quickly... I haven’t even started yet

1: Next question, no fouls are allowed this time , please listen, how many platforms are there in a single diving competition? Start

3: Divers dive from the 1-meter, 3-meter springboard, or from the 3-meter, 5-meter, 7.5-meter and 10-meter platforms

1: The answer is correct, please listen Next question, how long is each quarter in an Olympic basketball game? Start

4: It's ten minutes

1: The answer is correct, please listen to the question...

2: Wait a minute, 1, I'm with them I don’t have the right to speak together. Can you ask me a question alone?

1: I’m afraid this won’t work. I have to seek their opinions.

34: Our college students are of high quality, so let him answer

1: Okay, please listen to the question. In a shooting competition, how many flying saucers are there in the sky?

2: Flying saucer? You mean UFO? Why haven’t I seen this thing appear in a shooting competition?”

1: Stop talking nonsense. A flying saucer is a flying saucer, not a UFO.

2: A flying saucer is a UFO.

1: I say no

2: I said yes

1: No

2: Yes

1: No

2: The flying saucer is not a UFO

1: Flying saucers are UFOs

2: Haha, this is what you said. I don’t know how many UFOs there will be in shooting competitions. They are alien vehicles.

1: Okay, okay, you are awesome

1 continued: This round is over. Your performance is unsatisfactory. If your performance is still the same in the last round, In this case, I will have to reconsider giving this volunteer spot to someone else

234: No, judge! Give us another chance

1: Let’s see your performance in the last round. The rules of the final round are as follows. Each contestant will give a half-minute summary speech. Let’s start now... This time, 4 will go first...

4 (cough, clear throat): First of all, thank you CCTV, JSTV, MTV, Channel V give me this opportunity to stand here, it seems there is no CCTV, sorry. I would like to thank my parents for giving me a strong body, and I would like to thank so many fans in the audience for their silent support and affirmation for me over the years. I would also like to thank our great motherland for giving me this opportunity to run for the Olympic Games. who. Thank you.

Even though I was unfortunately eliminated this time, I will still support our Olympic Games as an ordinary classmate in the days to come. Thank you!

3: From Confucius and Mencius in the Spring and Autumn Period to the ordinary people of socialism today, each of us is dreaming of the same dream, hoping that our motherland will be strong. Now the Olympic Games are at our doorstep. As a college student, I have an obligation to let the world know about our motherland and our five thousand years of splendid civilization

2: I don’t have anything to say, I just made an impromptu poem to host the Olympic Games I am proud, everyone's face is proud, I have contributed to the Olympics and volunteer to be a good host!

1 Applause: Okay, each of you makes me reluctant to give up. I have decided that all three of you will be Olympic volunteers and cheer for our Olympics and our motherland together! Perhaps the power of one of us is insignificant, but as long as we serve the motherland and the people wholeheartedly, it is a powerful force! Now I have to go to other places to recruit volunteers to make our Olympic Games the best it can be! (Going behind the scenes)

234: Hey, hey, hey, there are still us, 1, wait for us, let’s go and be volunteers now! (Chasing 1, next)

Antonyms

One day, the teacher walked into the classroom, and the students stood up and shouted: "Good morning, teacher!"

The teacher was angry Said: "Just say good morning? What about my afternoon? Isn't it bad?"

So the students shouted again: "Good afternoon, teacher!"

Teacher Then he said angrily: "What about me in the evening?"

The students shouted together: "Teacher, it's okay in the evening!"

The teacher nodded and said: "That's all right, now Say it again!"

The students shouted together: "Good morning, teacher, good afternoon, and good evening!"

The teacher said: "Sit down! Today we are going to review antonyms. Let’s practice like this. Let me say something. Let’s start now.”

Teacher: “The weather is very good today.”

Student: “The weather is bad today.”

Teacher: "The sun is shining everywhere."

Student: "It is cloudy everywhere."

Teacher: "The road is crowded with people."

< p>Student: "The road is empty."

Teacher: "Young."

Student: "Old."

Teacher: "Stand. ”

Student: “Lie down”

Teacher: “There is a young man standing on the road”

Student: “There is a young man lying down. On the way."

Teacher: "I picked up a dollar."

Student: "I lost a dollar."

Teacher: "I picked up a dollar. One yuan, give it to the teacher."

Student: "I lost one yuan and stole it from the teacher."

Teacher: "Wrong, you can't say that."

Student: "Correct, you should say it like this!"

Teacher: "Wrong."

Student: "Correct."

Teacher: "This No, this is illegal!"

Student: "This is okay, this is legal!"

Teacher: "I said it was wrong."

Student. : "What we say is correct."

Teacher: "Listen to the teacher, what the teacher says is correct!"

Student: "Listen to us, what the teacher says is wrong! ”

Teacher: “You are stupid”

Student: “We are smart.

"

Teacher: "Stop! ”

Student: “Continue!” ”

Teacher: “Stop now!” Stop talking! ”

Student: “Let’s continue now! More to say! ”

Teacher: “You stupid pigs, I say stop!” ”

Student: “We are all geniuses, we say continue!” ”

Teacher: “You listen to the teacher!” ”

Student: “Teacher, listen to us! ”

Teacher: “Students must listen to the teacher!” ”

Student: “Teachers must listen to their students!” ”

Teacher: “Stop practicing now! ”

Student: “Now let’s continue practicing!

Teacher: "Are you done?" ”

Student: “We have a beginning and an end!” ”

Teacher: “Then stop!” idiot! ”

Student: “Then we should continue!” genius! "

....Then the teacher walked out of the classroom angrily holding the book in his arms

A: Hello everyone, who wants to have another two drinks with me? (Bumping into the street lamp) I'm sorry, are you okay? ? Oh. (Covering head)

(B enters)

A: Stop, raise your hands.

B: Oh, oh, get up, it’s cold underground.

A: Who are you, kid?

B: I just got off the train and was going home.

A: There are two ways before you, one is to take me home, the other is to take me home.

B: Are you living in a wine vat?

< p>A: I just came out of the wine vat.

B: OK, OK, I can’t support you anymore. Where do you live?

A : My family lives in Loess Gaopo.

My home is three hundred miles across the river.

B: Me. I know where you live.

We all have a home called China.

A: Yes, after singing this song, we dispersed.

< p>B: We have to leave too.

A: I’ll take you home.

B: No,

A: Then you go. I'm going home.

Where's your ID card?

A: Where do I have my ID card?

B: There’s no other way. Goodbye

A: Well, is your diploma okay?

B: You still have your diploma?

p>

A: Nursery.

B: You really drank too much! Come on, sit here and wake up. You'll be home soon.

Oh. , tell me why you drank so much!

A: I didn’t drink too much.

B: It’s not like you did. Ten can support a winery.

A: What’s wrong with you?

B: I just got off the train and want to go home.

< p>A: With ten people like you, we can support a train station. We only go home during the holidays

B: My mother is sick over there and is hospitalized.

< p>A: Is your mother in hospital?

B: I don’t know you. Also, my mother is in Tibet.

A: I have a heart attack. What, cerebral thrombosis and vegetative state can’t be cured?

B: It’s not the heart, it’s Tibet.

A: Heart disease is nothing. Cerebral thrombosis and vegetative state can’t be cured.

B: My heart is Tibet.

A: I know a train driver who is very good at traveling on the Qinghai-Tibet Railway.

B: You are still thinking of my mother, thank you!

A: Oh, I have to go back quickly. Goodbye, little rabbit! (Hit the streetlight again) Sorry, why are you still here? !

A is Guo Donglin, B is Shao Feng

(may not be complete)