Blind date dialogue problem

There should be no hope. In this aspect of communication, chatting should be purposeful and bring feelings closer. Chatting is mostly emotional communication or inner catharsis. But chatting is also hierarchical. Chatting with low-level people and complaining will only make the listener sad, and the speaker will not achieve the purpose of emotional communication. High-level people can not only bring each other closer, but also deepen their feelings in the process of chatting.

First, chatting should have a purpose. With a certain purpose, you can ask questions in time and adjust the content of the chat at any time.

Second, we should pay attention to choosing the right chat friends.

Third, choose the right chat topic.

1. Some people misunderstand the topic of chatting and think that only those extraordinary events are worth talking about. In fact, people not only like to listen to anecdotes, but also like to listen to ordinary topics related to daily life. Another misunderstanding of the topic is that you must talk about profound and learned topics in order to gain the respect of others, but it is difficult to find a confidant when talking about such issues.

2. Rules: If you want to deal with customers, you must first have the courage and ability to talk to anyone. As a scholar said, "If you can talk to anyone for 10 minutes and arouse their interest, you are the best communicator."

3, as long as you have the heart to contact others, there are many topics. What a person sees, hears and feels is a good topic.

4. You can talk about ideals, social responsibility and philosophy of life; You can talk about work experience, colleague relationship, friendship and love; You can talk about books, movies, TV and drama, and give full play to your appreciation. We can talk about weather, entertainment, food, clothes, housing and transportation.

However, some words should be carefully avoided:

Don't pretend to be an expert on things you don't know.

Don't brag about your achievements to strangers, such as personal achievements, your wealth, your son's extraordinary intelligence and so on.

Don't talk about friends' failures, defects and privacy in public.

Don't talk about controversial topics.

Don't complain and grumble everywhere, it's not the right way to win sympathy.

6. It is best to choose the topic according to the local materials, that is, to choose the topic according to the environment at that time.

7. You can also ask the other person some questions that he is familiar with and interested in.

8. There are three steps to getting close to others and getting along with others:

Find out what other people are particularly interested in.

Accumulate some knowledge of those things that the other party is interested in.

Let him know that you are really interested in that thing.

9. Keep in touch if you don't have a chance to talk.

10, in order to make the chat fruitful, we must grasp the following factors:

Understanding and singing skills, the first factor is whether you can establish the same language, get the understanding of the other party, and produce singing skills.

To establish * * * similarity, when communication is smooth, we need to cooperate to find * * * similarity, instead of emphasizing the differences in ideas.

1 1. Let the chat warm up for the formal conversation. When the conversation begins, we might as well talk about the weather. In addition to the issues you are most concerned about and interested in, you should reserve more information to "chat" with others.

I played some harmless jokes.

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Health and medicine

Family problems. For example, children's education, shopping experience, how couples get along, social interaction with relatives and friends, and family arrangements.

Sports and entertainment.

A sensational social news? Politics and religion (everyone's political views are close)

Jokes. If you conceive many jokes and can tell them, you are probably the most popular person.

Fourth, it should be noted that when chatting, don't ask some challenging questions, so as not to cause heated debates and break up in discord. Don't be self-righteous, speak in a didactic tone.

5. Let friendship start with a friendly chat? When talking, if you can get the other person to talk about what he is interested in, it means that you have cleverly attracted the other person. At this time, we will ask questions to induce the other person to talk about his personal living habits, experiences, wishes, interests and other issues. Smart people are people who can make good use of human nature.

It is your responsibility to let the other person talk about the topic he cares about and ask such questions. For example, the current political situation, industrial situation, or the car he drives, the current traffic conditions, the road conditions of expressways, the current income tax rate, food prices and so on. The topic that a person is most willing to talk about is also the most concerned topic, which is nothing more than his private affairs.

Sixth, talk about your elegance. Knowing how to associate freely with people can expand your topic-how to chat with strangers and make life colorful. That summer, Danshui Railway Station in Taiwan Province Province was very hot, but I stood on the platform of the station, but my mood was cold. Because a famous writer will come by train, and I am the editor of the school magazine, and I was sent to pick him up. The big shot finally arrived, and I was at a loss. I can't talk. After a while, I reluctantly said, "I write, too." He replied kindly, "Well, we have a lot to talk about." But I was too scared to speak and felt that I had put my foot in my mouth. It's hard for you to open a strange mouth. Many people are afraid of meeting strangers. "I don't know how to speak" and "I don't know what to say" are common problems of ordinary people. For example, we can't think of anything interesting or meaningful to say at the party; I tried my best to make a good impression in the job interview, but I was too nervous to know what to say.

In fact, whenever we meet someone who looks interesting, we are always nervous and don't know how to start a conversation. Unfamiliar = charming. Knowing how to communicate freely with people can expand our circle of friends and enrich our lives. When talking about the past experience of traveling around the world as a reporter, a senior reporter said that talking with strangers is like opening a gift without knowing what's inside beforehand, which is full of surprises. Strangers are charming because we know nothing about them. He once met a nun in New Orleans. She looked gentle and cold. But it turns out that her job is to help rude young released prisoners turn over a new leaf. Behind these young released prisoners, there are one or several unique stories. Who would have thought that the soul of a nun who seems to be calm in the sea should bear so many rough lives? Is her life peaceful? Or is your life peaceful? This is her colorful life.

? Or is your life colorful?

? Different is the value. An old woman I met on the train in Canada said that she was going to a village in the Arctic Circle because she heard that polar bears could be seen walking in the streets there. And a taxi driver in the Valley of the Kings of Egypt invited him to his unpaved home for tea, which made him experience a completely different lifestyle from ours. Fear of visiting the so-called fear of visiting is a psychological manifestation of anxiety when visiting customers. When selling products, we often have the opportunity to meet all kinds of people, some are relatives and friends, some are strangers. According to the book How to Be an Excellent Salesman written by the Chairman of Japan Management Association, it is pointed out that if the product knowledge is insufficient, confidence is insufficient, there are disputes or troubles, fatigue, anxiety, competitors or selling goods to busy shops and senior officials, etc. It is more likely to cause fear.

Therefore, psychologically, we should be fully prepared:

1, good at "disfigurement".

2. Do it if there is a possibility of 100% rejection.

3. For the benefit of customers, keep the confidence of visiting.

4. Understand the customers' thoughts in a relaxed mood.

I thought I would do business relations for the company.

6. Think of it as a good opportunity to sell yourself.

7. Don't pester for too long and leave as soon as possible.

8. Stick to the idea that an agreement has been reached.

9. Get ready for your second visit.

10, keep your interest and care back. If you are going to approach strangers, how can you speak and get rid of that invisible barrier?

The following methods may be useful to you.

1. Tell your feelings frankly: For example, you may whisper to yourself at a dinner party: I am too shy for this kind of party. Or on the contrary, you think many people hate this kind of party, but I like it very much. Anyway, you should tell the first person who is willing to listen how you feel. This person may be your confidant. Frankly speaking "I don't know anyone here" or "I don't know what to say" is much better than being stiff and indifferent-the most talkative person is the one who dares to confess. I once talked to a computer expert. I was usually comfortable with such an interview, but I was shocked when I found myself stuttering and didn't know how to speak. Finally I said, "I don't know why I'm a little afraid of you." He laughed after listening, and then everyone chatted naturally.

2. Talk about the surrounding environment: If you are curious, you will naturally find the topic of conversation. Once a stranger looked around and then broke the silence and said to me, "You can see all kinds of life at the waiting station!" " "This is a good opening remarks.

3. Take the other person as the topic: People often try their best to make others pay attention to themselves, but most of the "achievements" are disappointing, because he won't care about you and me, he will only care about himself. Therefore, taking the other person as the beginning of the conversation can often make others feel good. Praise the stranger's sentence "Your clothes are really well matched with colors" and "Your hairstyle is very fashionable". It can make him happy and ease their estrangement. Perhaps, most of us don't have the courage to say so, but we can say, "The book you read is my favorite." Or "I saw you walking past that convenience store, and I thought …".

4. Question: We can think of this conversation as throwing and catching the ball. Many unforgettable conversations also start with a question. People are often asked, "How is your daily work?" Usually people have enthusiastic answers. For someone who is introverted and looks shy, you might as well ask more questions to help him continue the topic.

5, pay attention to listening: half of the speculation in conversation depends on listening, listening is an art, and you can't really talk without listening. When talking to someone you just met, look at him, respond to what he says and encourage him to continue. In this way, listening becomes an active action rather than a passive action, and it is constantly explored further. Effective communication-different from boring gossip, the purpose is to find and understand each other. Many people can't make a good impression on others, just because they can't concentrate on listening to each other and only think about what to say next. In fact, a talkative person is also a patient listener. Therefore, if you want others to like you, being a patient listener and encouraging others to speak freely is the biggest trick.

6. If you find a stranger talking to you, his eyes are always staring at you, don't be shy, and shrink back. Try talking about ideology, because these people are interested in abstract thinking. If you are weak in abstract thinking, you might as well ask this question and let him teach you, and both sides are satisfied. To sum up, you are curious about others, and others are curious about you. You can increase their interest in life and they can also increase your interest in life. However, if only the other party speaks freely and is stingy with their own efforts, the purpose of two-way communication will not be achieved. Some people feel shy or dull and say, "We have nothing to talk about." However, in fact, almost everyone has something interesting to share with others. Many people will be ashamed to express their views because they are different from others. However, it is precisely because of this difference that life can become a big stage. If we are honest with each other, we can be opportunistic. We need the stimulation of a stranger-someone who is different from us and is still a mystery for the time being. In addition, meeting strangers will also affect you to some extent. If you have contact with each other, you may become a part of your future life. Therefore, no matter where you go, you should face others with a happy mood and a sweet smile and talk with others sincerely. Don't be afraid to express your wrong feelings and don't hold grudges against others. Always thinking of happy things. Over time, you will find that your life is full of fun, and the gap with strangers will easily disappear. ...