Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - The Wanderers of Wuzhou River in Huang Yongyu (Excerpt)

The Wanderers of Wuzhou River in Huang Yongyu (Excerpt)

Every man has a career when he grows up. While the iron is hot, picking manure and growing vegetables, executioners, battalion commanders, colonels, school teachers, sedan chairs, fortune tellers and shrews are all hard-won things to earn a living. Everyone is familiar with their sufferings, but they are reluctant to change careers.

Only chasing mountains and hunting wild animals is just a lifelong hobby! No one forces anyone; It was windy and rainy, cold and hot, so I just walked up the hill. Think about what he wants to do. Leaving his wife and children behind. You tell him that I will take care of you and give you money. You stay in the house and don't go anywhere. What is he doing? What he thinks and likes is hard to buy. In spring, all the flowers belong to him. (How about the flowers bought in bottles in your city? ) That fragrance is matched with Qian Qian's ten thousand kinds of gas fields; Birds singing, bees buzzing, snakes winding, some Mao Mao rain and some distant waterfalls. In summer, when I was tired of walking in the deep mountain cliff valley, I unloaded my gun and bullet belt, and there were familiar pools in the forest. The sun shines from the surrounding canopy and you soak in the pool. You missed everything, your mother, and your wife who still lost touch with you. Ferns, ivy and saxifragon grow on the cliff near Shitan. You carefully watch the fragrance emanate from the spores at the bottom of the leaves one by one. In autumn, ginkgo trees, Chinese tallow trees, maple trees and all the tall and short trees are hopelessly drunk, and there is a strong smell of alcohol in the sun. You walked dozens of miles, dozens of miles of bushes like gauze. You scold your dog like a drunken drunkard, a beast that has not been shot, a beast that has been hit by you and is too heavy to throw away, its mother, its mother who sleeps with it ... it is difficult for you to stay with thorns, hook your bullet belt, your pants, the back of your hand, bleeding, blood sucking, and so on. You peed in a smooth hole, hoping to pour something out, and the urine is gone! Only one tenth of the project has been completed. You scold the hole and its residents. You have anger in your heart, and you know that the mountains are dry in autumn, so you can't be angry. When you are tired, you lie on the deep and soft dry yellow thatch, and the dog sleeps next to you. When you wake up, where will you wake up tonight? "Xiaofeng waning moon, Yang Liuan, who do you think you are? Where do you think you are? Go home and sleep! In winter, I get breathless as soon as I go out. How dare you praise the world! I can't open my eyes in white. Only dogs like this time, barking and running, making rows of small black holes on the ground. You are in a hurry to pee because you are happy to see snow and cold. You took the trouble to unbutton several layers of pants, and finally took out the urinal and wrote a signature on the bill of the bank president in the snow. When you touch it again, you are stunned! You ask the vast land where are the testicles? You can't hide in your stomach if you are afraid of the cold! All right! Open the way. Snow rustles, it is a trot; There is no time to ring the bell when the snow is thick. The snow at the far end of the mountain is blue, and the snow under your feet is golden and sometimes purple by the sun. The stream is shining with black light, laying a black belt on the inhabited village. The snow on the slope is thick and the rabbit hair turns white, so you can't find it anymore, and the dog can't catch up with it when it smells it. Pheasants can't change color and hide in snow holes. It should come out to find something from time to time. If you're lucky, you can take it off. You went to the top of the slope, darker than snow and bright enough to make people want to laugh. Eyebrows and beards are frosted, and a cold air gets into my stomach, like drinking well water on a hot day, and I can't breathe. Suddenly, your eyes shine, and there is a big goat standing on the cliff, weighing 50 kg, 60 kg and 60 kg. You grab the dog by the ear and tell it not to bark. You aim your gun-sooner or later, the lice on your body will bite you. Can't help it! I can't help it! -You grit your teeth and aim. The goat is moving, and it's time to go! So relaxed, carefree and irresponsible! Goat, how can you walk? What should I do? How can I have the face to meet people? Fuck you, mother of lice! I don't love you! I'll take off my clothes at once and wipe you out completely, leaving you childless. Hmm! It's so cold, can you teach me how to take it off? I'll go home and burn this dress, which has lice on it! What do your mother's lice do? The weather is hot and cold. I went home and told people that I met a goat weighing more than 200 kilograms standing on the cliff because of itchy lice, and I didn't shoot it. Do you believe me? Can people stand not gloating at my jokes?

..... This lingering feeling of pain for it, once infected, only a few things can be compared, love, revolution ...... do not hesitate to die!