Wonderful passages from Chapter 2 of Childhood

In the dim small house, my father was lying on the floor with his hands and feet spread out.

He was wearing white clothes, barefoot, and his fingers were curled weakly.

His happy eyes were tightly closed and turned into two black holes; he bared his teeth and grinned, as if she was trying to scare me.

My mother knelt next to him and combed my father's hair with the little comb I often used to saw off watermelon rinds.

The mother was wearing a red apron and talking to herself in a rough voice, with tears constantly flowing from his swollen eyeballs.

Grandma held my hand tightly. She was also crying and trembling all over, making my hands tremble too.

She wanted to push me to my father's side, but I didn't want to go. I was afraid!

I have never seen such a formation, and I feel an inexplicable fear.

I don’t understand what my grandma meant when she repeatedly told me:

“Quickly, say goodbye to daddy. My child, he is not yet old, but he is dead. Don't even think about seeing him, my dear..."

I have always believed in everything my grandma said. Even though she is now wearing black clothes, her head and eyes look surprisingly big, which is quite strange and interesting.

When I was young, I had a serious illness and my father took care of me. But later, my grandma came and he came to take care of me.

"Where are you from?"

I asked.

"Nizini, you came by boat, you can't walk. You can't walk on the water, kid!"

She answered.

You can’t walk on water! Take a boat ride!

Ah, so ridiculous, so interesting!

There are a few bearded Persians living upstairs in my house; in the basement there is an old man named Carmichael who sells sheepskins; you can slide down the stairs, and if you fall, you will fall headfirst. Go down.

I am very familiar with all this, but I have never heard of people who came up from the water.

"Why am I a brat?"

"Because you talk too much!"

She said with a smile.

From that moment on, I fell in love with this kind old man. I hope she will lead me out of here immediately.

Because I feel so miserable here.

My mother's crying scared me. She had never been so weak. She had always been strict.

My mother is tall, strong-boned, and has extremely strong hands. She is always dressed neatly.

But now it’s no longer possible, the clothes are skewed, messy, and in a mess; the hair used to be combed smoothly and stuck to the head like a bright big hat, but now it is pulled on the bare shoulders , she knelt there, and some of her hair touched her father's face.

I stood in the room for a long time, but she didn't even look at me. She just kept combing my father's hair, tears streaming down her face.

There were some people chattering outside the door, including country people in black clothes and policemen.

"Okay, hurry up and clean up!"

The police roared impatiently.

The window was covered with a black shawl. When a gust of wind came, the shawl was blown up and trembled loudly.

This sound reminds me of the time my father took me boating. We were playing, and suddenly there was a thunder in the sky, which scared me and screamed.

My father laughed loudly, clamped me with his knees, and said loudly: "Don't be afraid, it's okay!"

Thinking of this, I suddenly saw my mother struggling to get up from the floor. He stood up, but he couldn't stand firmly. He fell on his back and his hair was scattered on the floor.

Her eyes were closed, her face was ashen, and she grinned like her father: "Get out, Alexey! Close the door."

Grandma ran to the corner. Behind a box, the mother was rolling on the ground, groaning in pain and gritting her teeth.

Grandma followed her crawling on the ground and said happily: "Oh, Holy Mother bless you!

"In the name of the Father and the Son, Varusha, hold on! "

How terrible!

They rolled around their father and touched him back and forth, but he didn't move, as if he was still smiling!

They struggled on the floor for a long time. Mother stood up several times and fell down again; grandma was like a strange black ball, rolling around with her mother.

Suddenly, in the darkness, I heard a child cry!

“Oh, thank my Lord, it’s a boy! "

The candles were lit.

I can't remember what happened next. Maybe I fell asleep in the corner.

In my memory Another impression that can be continued is that of a desolate corner of the cemetery.

It was raining, and I stood on a small mound that was sticky to my feet, watching them place my father's coffin in the grave.

The pit was full of water, and there were a few frogs, two of which had climbed onto the lid of the yellow coffin.

Standing next to the grave were me, grandma, the police and the police. Two countrymen with shovels in their hands and gloomy expressions.

The raindrops kept hitting everyone.

"Bury it, bury it!" "

The policeman gave the order.

Grandma started crying again and covered her face with a corner of her scarf.

The countryman immediately stuck his buttocks out and went into the pit. Filling with soil.

The soil splashed into the water, making a splash; the two frogs jumped off the coffin and climbed up the wall of the pit, but the clods of soil quickly knocked them down again. .

“Let’s go, Alexei! "

Grandma patted my shoulder, and I broke away. I didn't want to leave.

"Oh, it's true, God! ”

I don’t know whether she was blaming me or God. She stood there in silence. The grave was filled up, but she still stood there, motionless.

Scratch The wind picked up and the rain blew away.

The two countrymen used their shovels to flatten the ground with a crackling sound.

My grandma led me along the dark road. between the crosses, walking towards the distant church

“Why don’t you cry? "You should cry a lot!" she said as she walked out of the cemetery wall.

"I don't want to cry."

"Oh, I don't want to cry, then forget it, just don't cry!"

I rarely cry, even if I cry Because I was angry, not because of pain or anything.

When I cried, my father laughed at me, and my mother sternly scolded me: "Don't cry!"

We sat in a small carriage and walked on the dirty streets. superior. The street is wide, with dark red houses on both sides.

"Can those two frogs still come out?"

"Maybe they can't come out, but God will bless them. It's okay!"

Neither father nor mother had ever talked about God so frequently.

A few days later, my grandma, mother and I boarded a ship together.

The newly born little brother was dead, wrapped in white cloth and wrapped with a red tape, lying quietly on a small table.

I sat on the baggage and looked out from the small window. The foamy turbid water outside receded, and the splashing water hit the window from time to time.

I jumped up instinctively.

"Oh, don't be afraid!"

Grandma picked me up with her warm hands and put me on the baggage.

There is a vast gray fog on the water, and black land occasionally appears in the distance, and then disappears again in the thick fog.

Everything around her was trembling, except for the mother, with her hands behind her head, standing against the boat, motionless.

Her face was ashen, her legs were tightly closed, and she remained silent.

She became a different person, even her clothes changed, and I felt she was becoming more and more unfamiliar.

Grandma often said to her: "Valia, eat something, eat less, okay?"

My mother didn't seem to hear and remained motionless.

My grandma always speaks softly and slowly to me. When talking to my mother, she speaks louder, but she is also very careful and seems to be a little timid.

She seems to be a little afraid of her mother, which makes my grandma and I closer.

"Saradov, where is the sailor?"

The mother suddenly shouted angrily.

What? Saladov? sailor? strangeness.

A man with white hair walked in. He was wearing blue clothes and holding a wooden box.

Grandma took the wooden box and put the little brother's body inside.

She stretched out her arms to hold the wooden box and walked towards the door, but she was so fat that she had to turn sideways to squeeze through the narrow hatch.

She was a little overwhelmed.

"Look at you, Mom!"

The mother shouted, grabbed the coffin, and they left.

I was still in the cabin, looking at the man in blue.

"Ah, the little brother is dead, isn't he?"

"Who are you?"

"Sailor."

"Where's Saradov?"

"It's a city. Look, it's right outside the window!"

From time to time, moving black earth is revealed in the mist outside the window, as if it had just come from a big loaf of bread. A round piece cut from the top.

"Where is grandma?"

"Go and bury your little brother."

"Buried in the ground?"

"If not buried in the ground, where can I bury him?"

I told him about the two frogs buried when I buried my father. He picked me up and kissed me.

"Ah, kid, there are some things you still don't understand!"

"There's no need to pity those frogs, just pity your mother. Look at how she was tortured. Ah!"

The whistle sounded.

I knew it was a boat calling, so I wasn’t afraid. The sailor quickly put me down and ran out, saying, "Hurry, hurry!"

I couldn't help but start running too.

Outside the door, there was no one in the dark corridor. The copper panels on the stairs gleamed.

Looking up, some people were walking around carrying burdens and bags. They were getting off the boat, and it was time for me to get off too.

But when I walked to the steps beside the deck with everyone, someone shouted to me: "Whose child is this?"

"I don't know. Whose child am I? ”

People touched me and patted me, which made me feel a little overwhelmed. Finally the white-haired sailor ran over, picked me up and said, "Oh, he ran out of the cabin and came from Astrakhan."

He hugged me back In the cabin, he threw it on the luggage, scaring me:

"I'm going to beat you if you run around again!"

I sat there blankly.

The footsteps and voices overhead quieted down, and the ship stopped chuffing and trembling.

There was a wet wall blocking the window in the cabin. The cabin was dark and the luggage seemed to be a lot bigger. It was so crowded that I couldn’t breathe.

Am I just thrown on the boat forever?

I went to open the door, but it couldn't be opened. The brass door handle couldn't be turned at all.

I picked up the milk bottle and threw it at the door handle. The bottle broke and the milk flowed down my legs and into my boots.

I was so depressed that I lay on the bundle and cried quietly. Finally, I fell asleep with tears in my eyes.

The thumping and trembling of the ship made the windows in my cabin shine brightly, like a little sun.

Grandma sat next to me, frowning and combing her hair. She kept mumbling to herself.

Her hair is particularly thick, covering her shoulders, chest, and knees, and hanging down to the ground.

She picked up her hair from the ground with one hand and struggled to comb the small wooden comb into her thick hair.

Her lips were tilted unconsciously, and her dark eyes were staring angrily at the hair in front of her; her face looked very small and ridiculous in the mass of hair.

She was unhappy today, but when I asked her why her hair was so long, her tone was as gentle as yesterday: "This seems to be a punishment from God. He is asking me to comb these damn things." Hair!

“When I was young, this was my treasure to show off, but now I curse it!

"Go to sleep, my baby, it's still early, the sun has just risen!

"I won't sleep! "

"Okay, I won't sleep if I don't want to sleep," she agreed immediately. While braiding her hair, she looked at her mother lying on the sofa. Her mother was lying there, motionless. Like a piece of wood. "Okay, tell me, why did you break the milk bottle yesterday?" Tell me in a lower voice! "

She spoke gently and sweetly, and every word was so patient. I remembered every word.

When she smiled, her black eyes were bright, There was an indescribable joy in her face. Her teeth were as white as snow, and although her face was a bit dark, she still looked young.

The most disgraceful thing about her face was probably her big, floppy nose and red nose.

She brought me out of the darkness and into the light, and brought a beautiful aura to everything around me!

She is my forever! My friend is the person I know best, and I am most intimate with her!

Her selfless love guides me and makes me never lose the courage to live in any difficult environment!

p>

In these days 40 years ago, the ship moved forward slowly. It took us several days to arrive in Nigeria. I can still clearly recall those first few days.

The weather turned fine, and my grandma and I stayed on the deck all day.

The Volga River flows quietly, the air is crisp, the sky is clear, and the autumn colors on both sides are thick, a scene before harvest.

The orange ship went upstream, its paddles lapping slowly on the blue water, rumbling.

The barge was towed behind the ship. The barge was gray. Like a country turtle.

As the boat moves, the scenery on both sides of the river changes every moment, including cities, villages, mountains, rivers, and the golden leaves floating on the water.

“Ah, how beautiful! "

Grandma was radiant, walking around on the deck, her eyes widened with excitement.

She occasionally stopped and stood there, looking at the river bank in a daze, her hands crossed Put it on my chest, with a smile on my face and tears in my eyes.

I tugged on her black skirt. "Oh, I seem to have fallen asleep!" ”

She was shocked.

"Why are you crying?"

"Dear baby, I cry because I am so happy!"

"I am old, you know , I have lived for 60 years!”

She took a sniff and began to tell me some weird stories, including kind-hearted robbers, monsters, and saints.

Her voice was low, her face was close to mine, and she stared mysteriously into my eyes, seeming to pour exciting power into my eyes from there.

She speaks fluently and naturally, very pleasantly. Every time she finishes speaking, I always say:

"Tell me one more!"

"Okay, Okay, let’s talk about it again!”

“There was a kitchen god who was sitting in the stove. The noodles dug into the soles of his feet. He screamed: “Ouch, it hurts, I hurt. No more, little mouse! '"

As she spoke, grandma raised one foot and dangled it, pretending to be in great pain, as if she was the Kitchen God with noodles stuck into the soles of her feet.

And me Also listening to the story were the sailors on the ship, all tall men with beards.

They praised grandma for telling it well and asked: "Tell me one more, old lady!" "

Also said:

"Let's go have dinner with us! "

At the dinner table, they invited my grandma to drink vodka and let me eat watermelon and cantaloupe.

However, all this was done secretly, because there was a person on the boat who prohibited all food. If a man eats fruit, he will not hesitate to grab the fruit and throw it into the river for you.

This man's clothes are a bit like a police uniform, with copper buttons on it. He seemed drunk all day long, and people avoided him.

Mother rarely came on the deck, and she avoided us.

Mother was tall and upright, with a livid face. , the braids are thick and coiled on the top of her head, like a crown.

She is always silent, as if there is an invisible fog covering her, her big gray eyes like her grandma, It seems that she is always observing the world indifferently from a distance

She once said sternly:

"Mom, everyone is laughing at you!" ”

“I don’t care, just go ahead and make them laugh!” "

I still remember clearly in my mind that when my grandma saw Ni Zini, she was as happy as a child.

She excitedly pulled me to the side of the ship. Next to him, he said loudly:

“Look, ah, it’s so beautiful! ”

“That’s Nigeria, my God, it looks like a place where gods live!” ”

“Look, that’s a church, it seems to be flying in the air!” "

She almost shed tears with excitement and begged my mother:

"Varyusha, can you take a look? "

"You may have forgotten this place. Take a look, you will be happy! "

The mother smiled very reluctantly.

The ship was anchored in the river.

The river was crowded with ships, and hundreds of masts towered into the sky. .

A boat full of people docked at the ship. People set up ladders from the ship and climbed onto the deck of the ship.

A skinny old man walked away. At the front, he is dressed in black, has a golden beard, a curved nose, and green eyes.

"Dad! "

The mother gave a deep and loud shout and threw herself into his arms.

He hugged his mother, stroked her face, and shouted in a high-pitched voice:

"Oh, silly child, what's the matter?"

" Oh, you people!"

At the same time, grandma was spinning like a top, hugging and kissing everyone in the blink of an eye.

She pushed me in front of everyone:

"Oh, come on, this is Uncle Mihalo, this is Uncle Yakov, this is Aunt Natalia, The two cousins ??are both called Sasha, and the cousin is called Katerina! "

"We are all a family, how about it? "

Grandpa asked grandma! :

"How are you, old mother?"

"They kissed three times.

Grandpa pulled me out of the crowd:

"Who are you? "

"I came up from Astrakhan and ran out of the cabin..."

"Oh, my God, what did he say! "Grandpa asked my mother. Without waiting for my answer, he pushed me away:

"Ah, look, the cheekbones are exactly the same as his father's!" Okay, let’s get off the boat! "

After getting off the boat, we walked up the slope. The slope was paved with large cobblestones, and both sides of the road were covered with withered yellow weeds.

Grandpa and my mother Walking at the front of the team. He was very small, just reaching his mother's shoulders. He walked very fast, while her mother seemed to be floating in the air, looking down at her father.

Following them were two uncles: Uncle Mikhail's black hair was neatly combed, and he was as skinny as his grandfather; Uncle Yakov's hair was light-colored and curled.

-------------

①Mihaalo’s nickname also includes several fat women who wear very bright clothes; The six children were at the back, all silent.

Walking with me was my grandma and my little aunt Natalia.

This aunt was pale and blue. My eyes and big belly make it difficult to walk. I often stop and gasp for breath:

"Ouch, I can't walk anymore!" ”

“Hey, why did they ask you to come too?” How stupid! "Grandma scolded.

Walking among this group of people, I felt very lonely. I felt like a stranger. Even grandma seemed to have changed and seemed alienated from me.

I dislike grandpa the most. I smell hostility in him. I'm a little afraid of him and a little curious.

As we go up the hill, there is a low street. The low bungalow compound stands in front. The pink paint is very dirty, the eaves are very low, and the windows are protruding.

Just looking at the appearance, you will think that it is very big inside. It was divided into many small rooms and was very crowded.

There were people everywhere. Everyone seemed to be losing their temper and walking around angrily. The children were jumping around like a group of sparrows stealing food. There was a particularly unpleasant smell in the air.

The yard was covered with wet cloths, and buckets were placed everywhere on the ground. The water in them was filled with colorful cloths.

In the corner of a house that was so low that it touched the ground, a fire was burning brightly, something was boiling, and there was a beeping sound. An invisible person shouted some strange words:

“Pterocarpus—magenta—sulfate. " Looking back on that period of time now, I can't believe it myself. I tried hard to think that maybe I remembered it wrong and it was not true, but the fact is the fact after all.

That was a passage spoken by a true, kind and beautiful genius. A tragic story, a bizarre and dark life filled with too much cruelty.

I am not just talking about myself. The small, breathless and terrifying scene I am talking about is the real life that ordinary Russians once had and has not disappeared until now. .

Grandpa’s family is full of hatred. Everything between adults is bound by hatred, and the children are rushing to join the ranks.

Later I learned from my grandma that when my mother came, her two younger brothers were strongly demanding that my grandpa split up the family.

My mother suddenly brought me back to this big family, which made their desire to separate the family even more impatient.

They were afraid that their mother would ask her grandfather for the dowry she should have received. The dowry was withheld because the mother disobeyed her father and got married. The two uncles agreed that the dowry should belong to them.

In addition, of course there are other trivial matters, such as who will open the dyeing shop in the city, and who will open the dyeing shop in the village of Navino on the other side of the Oka River, etc., etc., they The noise was overwhelming.

A few days after our arrival, an argument broke out in the kitchen while dining.

After the floor was cleared, the two uncles stood up, leaned forward, pointed at the grandfather across the table and roared, baring their teeth like a dog biting.

Grandpa banged the table with his rice spoon, his face flushed red, and he crowd like a rooster:

"Get out of here and beg for food!"

Grandma He said painfully:

"Okay, give it all to them, and save them all the trouble!"

"Shut up, you are used to it. !" Grandpa is small, but his voice is surprisingly high and deafening.

My mother stood up and walked to the window. He turned his back to everyone and said nothing.

At this time, Uncle Mikhail suddenly rounded his arms and slapped his brother!

The younger brother grabbed him, and the two of them rolled into a ball on the ground, panting, yelling, and moaning.

The children were so frightened that they burst into tears.

Aunt Natalia, who had a huge belly, shouted and persuaded her desperately, but my mother was stunned and dragged her away.

The always cheerful pock-marked nanny Ye Biangeniya chased the children out of the kitchen.

The uncles were now subdued:

Gypsy, a young and strong apprentice, rode on the back of Uncle Mikhail, while Grigory Ivan Norwich, a bald bearded man, calmly tied his hands with a handkerchief.

My uncle was gasping for breath and was pressed tightly to the floor. His beard was stuck in the cracks of the floor.

Grandpa stamped his feet, beat his chest, and wailed:

"You are brothers!

Alas!"

The war began , I jumped on the kang. I was curious and scared, watching everything that happened in front of me.

Grandma used the water in the copper basin to wash the blood on Uncle Yakov's face. He cried and stamped his feet in anger.

Grandma said sadly:

"You bastards, it’s time to wake up!"

Grandpa pulled the torn shirt over his shoulders and said to Grandma shouted:

"Old woman, look at these beasts you gave birth to!"

Grandma hid in the corner and howled:

"Holy Mother , please let my children understand some humanity!”

Grandpa stood in front of her in a daze, looking at the mess in the room, and he whispered:

“Old lady, Please be careful, be careful of them bullying Varvara!"

Oh, God, take off your shirt and let me sew it up for you! “She was taller than her grandfather, and when she hugged him, his head rested on her shoulder.

"Hey, let's separate the family, old woman!"

"Let's separate, old man!"

The two of them talked in harmony for a long time, but At the end, grandpa roared like a rooster in a high-pitched voice.

He pointed at his grandma and shouted:

"Okay, you love them more than me!"

"But what kind of sons do you raise? Mihiga is a heartless donkey, and Yahiga is a Franciscan! ”

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--------①Mihiga and Yahiga: contemptuous names for Mikhail and Yakov respectively.

②Francis: It is a religious group that originated in Europe in the 18th century. Its members are mostly liberal figures who do not adhere to etiquette and customs, and are unique. Then it turned into a curse word.

"They will eat and drink all my property!"

I turned over and knocked the iron off, and it fell into the dirty basin with a splash.

Grandpa rushed over to me, picked me up, and stared at my face, as if he was seeing me for the first time:

"Who asked you to be here? ? Is it your mother? ”

“Myself.”

“It’s not nonsense.”

He pointed at my forehead and threw me to the ground:

"Looks like your dad! Get out of here!"

I ran out of the kitchen quickly.

I don’t know why, but my grandfather’s sharp green eyes always stare at me. I am very afraid of him.

I tried my best to avoid him. He has such a bad temper, he is never nice to others, and his "hi" is long and annoying.

During the break, or while having evening tea, grandpa, uncles, and the boys all came back from the workshop. They were all exhausted, their hands were stained red by red sandalwood and burned by sulfate. skin.

Their hair was tied with ribbons, like the blackened icons in the kitchen corner.

My grandpa sat across from me and talked to me, which made his grandchildren very envious.

My grandpa has a thin figure with sharp lines. His round-neck silk vest has odd holes, his calico shirt is also wrinkled, and his trousers have patches.

Even though he was dressed like this, he was cleaner and more beautiful than the other two sons who were wearing breast protectors and triangular silk scarves.

A few days after we arrived, he started asking me to learn to pray.

The other children were all older than me, and they all learned to read from an acolyte in Uspiniya Church. The golden spire of the church could be seen from home.

The quiet Aunt Natalia taught me to recite prayers. Her face was round, like a child's, and her eyes were so clear that it seemed like I could see through her head. See everything behind her head.

I admired her eyes very much and stared at them intently.

She narrowed her eyes, lowered her head, and said quietly:

"Ah, please read with me: 'Our Father in Heaven'. Say it quickly?"

I don’t know why the question gets worse and worse, so I deliberately mispronounce it.

But my weak aunt just patiently corrected my pronunciation without getting angry at all.

This makes me angry.