"Funny joke" Am I the blackest person in the world?

1. Just lying down at night, my husband reached out. When I touched it, I shouted: I'm sweating. Such a big man doesn't know whether it is hot or cold! I took off my pajamas and said, isn't this much cooler? Me: Honey, I fucking admire you for finding the right reason every time you take off someone else's clothes! ! !

2. My girlfriend suddenly sent a message: "I was wrong about you!" I suddenly panicked, and I couldn't seem to hide it, so I had to confess: "Listen to me! Your girlfriend seduced me first! " At the same time, I received a second message from my girlfriend: "There is a man with the same hairstyle on the road!" "

3. Secretly ask the magic mirror at night: Am I the blackest person in the world? The magic mirror thought for a moment and made a frightened voice: Who, who the fuck is talking?

I saw several scars on the barber's arm, so I asked him how he got them. He said, I quarreled with a man who said I didn't chop him well. I didn't expect him to cut me, so I blocked it with my hand a few times. But it doesn't matter. Later, I asked my brothers to take them to the hospital. Oh, yes. Do you like this hairstyle? "it's full. . . Satisfied, very satisfied. "

5. I went to a small room at a nearby ATM and stayed up reading for about 2 hours. Two policemen knocked at the door and asked me what I was doing in it. I said I was reading, and he asked me why I was reading here. I said I couldn't stand it, so I inserted the bank card and looked at the balance, so I had the mind to continue reading.

6. It's time to change seasons again. Looking at all kinds of attractive fashions in the shop window, and then at the fat that I never give up, I finally made up my mind to lose weight. The male ticket was also very supportive and helped me make a weight loss plan. In order to urge me, he decided to lose weight with me. After a month of persistence, the effect is still obvious: we lost two kilograms in total-three kilograms for a male ticket.

7. The upstairs neighbor bought a big bottle of snake wine when he traveled to Thailand last year, and there was a big cobra in it. Drinking a little every day and always showing off to me is really effective, and his health is getting better and better. I feel that he is indeed more energetic than before. This paragraph is at least several years younger. He met me this morning and said he was out of wine. He took out the cobra to make soup, but found it was made of plastic. ...

8. Uncle: "Boy, you are blocking my financial path, and you will die very ugly. Do you know? " Me: "Uncle, I'm just waiting for my friend here. How can I get in your way? " Uncle: "Boy, talk back. Listen, you've only been here for a few minutes. Bidiu gave me more money than others. "