The original text of the work about beards

I took a trip to Chang'an this summer, and more than a month later, I came back confused. Friends who knew about it asked me, "What do you think of that place?" I recalled Chang'an with a suddenness. I remember seeing a lot of poplars, huge pomegranate trees, and drinking a lot of Yellow River water along the way. But what is there to talk about? So I said: "It's nothing." He then walked away in despair, and I continued to live in despair, feeling ashamed to face my friends who were "shameless to ask"③.

After drinking tea today, I read a book. There was a little water on the book, and I knew that the beard on my upper lip had grown again. If you look through the Kangxi Dictionary, you will see that the beards on the upper lip, lower lip, cheeks, and chin all have special names and posthumous names. ④ However, I am not so leisurely and unique. Anyway, this beard has grown again, and I have to cut it short again as usual to avoid getting wet. So I found a mirror and scissors, and started cutting with my hands. The purpose was to make it flush with the upper edge of the upper lip, forming a single character in official script.

While I was cutting, I suddenly remembered Chang'an and my youth, and I sighed continuously. I don’t remember clearly what happened in Chang’an. It must have been when I visited the Confucius Temple. There was a room with many prints hanging on it, including portraits of Li Erqu and emperors of the past dynasties. One of them was of Song Taizu or some other sect. , I can’t remember clearly, but he was wearing a robe and his beard was raised upward. So a celebrity resolutely said: "This is all faked by the Japanese. You see, this beard is a Japanese-style beard."

It is true that their beards are indeed so upturned, and they may not necessarily It is not necessary to forge the portrait of Song Taizu or any other sect, but to forge the portrait of the Chinese emperor, one must look in the mirror and use one's own beard as a pattern, so the methods and thoughts are so bizarre that they can be described as "unexpected"⑥. During the Qianlong reign of the Qing Dynasty, Huang Yi excavated stone portraits from the Wuliang Temple of the Han Dynasty. 7 Most of the men's beards were turned up. We now see the statues of believers in Buddhist statues from the Northern Wei Dynasty to the Tang Dynasty. 8 All those with beards were also turned up, until In Yuan Ming's portrait, the beard was probably dragged downwards by the suction from the center of the earth. How could the Japanese not be bothered to create so many fake antiques from the Han Dynasty to the Tang Dynasty and bury them in the ruins of the deep mountains and valleys of China's Qi, Lu, Yan, Jin, Qin, Long, Bashu?

I thought that the beard that dragged down was Mongolian style and was brought by the Mongols. However, our smart celebrities regard it as the quintessence of our country. Because students studying in Japan hate Japan, they are obsessed with Dayuan, saying, "If it weren't for luck at that time, this island country would have been wiped out by us!" 9 It is no wonder that the beard dragged down is the quintessence of the country. But why are they descendants of the Yellow Emperor? Why do we say that Taiwanese people are slaves in attacking Chinese people in Fujian?

I wanted to argue at the time, but I didn’t want to argue anymore. The patriot Mr. I just cited a few of China's shortcomings before, and they even caused the "low-income" to change their nationality. What's more, now it's an issue about Japan? Fortunately, even if Emperor Taizu of the Song Dynasty or some bearded sect were unfairly wronged, there would not be floods or earthquakes, so it wouldn't have anything to do with it. So I nodded repeatedly and said, "Buzz, buzz, that's right." Because I seemed much smoother than before, - okay.

I cut off the left tip of my beard and thought, Shaanxi people work hard to prepare food and use money to transport it in cars, ships, mule carts, and automatic cars. Please When I went to Chang'an to give a lecture, you probably never expected that I would not express my opinions directly even though I was concerned about trivial matters that would never lead to death. I would only say "buzz, buzz, right." They were simply deceived.

I looked at my face in the mirror again, looked at the right corner of my mouth, cut off the right tip of my beard, and scattered it on the ground, thinking of my youth——

That was already It's an old saying, it's about sixteen or seventeen years old.

I came back to my hometown from Japan, with an upturned beard like that of Song Taizu or some other sect, sitting in a boat and chatting with the boatman.

"Sir, you speak Chinese really well." Later, he said.

"I am Chinese, and I am from the same hometown as you. How could I..."

"Hahaha, you, sir, can also tell jokes."

< p>I remember how helpless I was at that time, it was indeed ten times worse than when I saw Mr. I didn’t carry my family tree with me at that time, so it really couldn’t prove that I was Chinese.

Even if you have a family tree with only one name and no portrait, it doesn't prove that the name is me. Even if there are portraits, the Japanese will forge stone carvings from the Han to the Tang Dynasty, portraits of Song Taizu or other sects, but why not forge a woodblock family tree?

For those who regard the truth as a joke, a joke as the truth, and a joke as a joke, there is only one way: just don't speak.

So I stopped talking.

However, if I were now, I would probably still say: "Buzz, buzz,...how nice is the weather today?...What is the name of the village over there?..." Because I am actually better than before. It seems much smoother, - that's it.

Now I think that the boatman’s decision to change my nationality may be different from Mr. The reason was just my beard, because I often suffered from it from then on.

The country will perish, and there will be no shortage of people with national quintessence. And as long as there are many people with quintessence of national quintessence, the country will not be destroyed. Those who are home to the quintessence of the country are those who preserve the quintessence of the country; and those who are the quintessence of the country are my beards. Although I don’t know what kind of “logical” method this is, this was indeed the reality at the time.

"How can you imitate the appearance of the Japanese, who are short in body and have such a beard..." A nationalist and patriot came to this conclusion after publishing a grand discussion.

Unfortunately, I was still an ignorant young man at that time, so I argued angrily. First, my body is only this tall originally. I did not deliberately try to use some foreign machine to compress it to make it shorter in order to pretend to be false. Second, my beard is indeed the same as that of many Japanese people. However, although I have not studied the history of changes in their beard styles, I have seen several portraits of ancient people. They are not upward, but outward, downward, and Our national quintessence is almost the same. After the Restoration, it became warped, which is probably due to the German style. Look at Emperor William's beard, doesn't it point up to the end of his eyes and be parallel to the bridge of his nose? Although he later burned one side due to smoking and had to cut both sides flat. But during the Meiji Restoration in Japan, there was no fire on his side...

This defense lasted about two minutes, but it could not relieve the anger of the quintessence of China, because Germany was also a foreign devil, and besides, I was short. Moreover, there are many Chinese quintessence scholars, and their opinions are very unified, so my defenses are very frequent, but they are always ineffective, once, twice, even ten or more than ten times. Even I feel bored and troublesome. That’s all, and besides, the glue used to groom beards is hard to come by in China, so I just let nature take its course from now on.

After letting things take their own course, the two ends of the beard will appear to be at a right angle to the ground, forming a ninety-degree right angle to the ground. As expected, the quintessence of nationalism has stopped talking, perhaps China has been saved.

However, it later aroused the resentment of reformers, and this is as it should be. So I became separated again, once, twice, or even many times. Even I felt bored and troubled.

About four to five years ago, or seventy or eight years ago, I was sitting alone in the clubhouse, lamenting the unfortunate situation of my beard, and studying the reasons why he was slandered. Suddenly, I suddenly realized that I knew the root of the problem. All on the tips on both sides. So I took out the mirror and scissors, and immediately cut it into a flat shape, so that it would neither rise up nor drag down, just like a single character in official script.

"Ah, your beard is like this?" Someone once asked this.

"Uh-huh, my beard is like this."

He had no words. I don't know whether it's because I can't find the two sharp points that I lost the basis for my argument, or if my beard is "like this" and I no longer bear responsibility for the survival of China. In short, I have been in peace and quiet since then. If it bothers me, I have to cut it off from time to time.

October 30, 1924.