Who has the joke at the beginning of the grave robbery notes?

It's dark and windy in the month, and it's a little cold at night in early spring.

Zhang Erzhou finally took a drag on the cigarette butt, threw it on the ground and trampled it out. He turned around and winked at those guys. Seven men shouldered the guy and walked towards the mound.

Zhang Erzhou is an old fairy. After graduating from secondary school in 2002, he couldn't find a job. Later, I worshipped a teacher in an Internet cafe and entered this business. After four years, he knows everything, big and small. He started his own business, took several apprentices and started to go it alone. In recent years, I gradually feel that the world is getting cold.

This time, he took his apprentice out to step on the plate. I didn't expect to meet an ancient tomb of the Tang Dynasty with a pickaxe. I haven't touched it yet. I hesitate again and again, and I really can't bear it. I decided to strike while the iron was hot to avoid cutting off others' beards.

Disciples are responsible for stealing holes. He looked at the clumsy people below and felt very depressed. These days, there are many people in society, and there are fewer and fewer like them. It's all lazy stuff. To steal a hole, six people are not as clever as him.

Finally, the King Kong Wall was dug, and several disciples became soft, so Zhang Erzhou had to go down and unload the tomb bricks himself. The position he chose is ok. After several times, he removed a hole the size of a football and took a photo with a flashlight. It's not small, and there are murals. His mother did it this time, without looking at the face of the antique shop owner.

While I was happy, a ghostly blue light suddenly lit up in the thief's hole, which startled Zhang Erzhou.

Looking back, an apprentice was absorbed in sending short messages on his mobile phone, using an old-fashioned blue screen and taking pictures of the whole hole stealing.

"Your grandpa's" Zhang Erzhou scolded 1, grabbed the phone, "you * * * want to die, when? Send me a text message and confiscate it! "

The apprentice scratched his head in frustration, and several others laughed gloatingly. One said, "Third son, report to your girlfriend. You are too punctual. How can you persist in this way? "

Zhang Erzhou made a gesture to shut up, picked up the confiscated mobile phone and scolded grandpa again.

* * * Wife, I'm already in the thief's hole. I can go in when the tomb brick is removed. You are very good and obedient. I will go home before seven o'clock. What do you want for breakfast? Shall I get it for you? ***

* * * My husband is great, so come on, I want to eat fried dough sticks and wonton, not onions * * *

* * * Got it, wife, give me a kiss * * *

What is it! Zhang Erzhou thought, this boy is mentally ill and can't have it. This time, he will be kicked out. Fuck him * * *, his attitude is too incorrect.

The grave is almost filled with gas. Zhang Erzhou unloaded several other bricks and took a group of people in. Flashlights shine everywhere. It should be the tomb of a big family, at least an official of the court. This is painted on a mural. A group of small people came in for the first time and looked around strangely, but they couldn't stop.

Zhang Erzhou clapped his hands and said softly, "Stop that now. As usual, I'll clean up everything in the ear room first, and I'll skin you if I break one. " Third son, fatty, give me a coffin. "

The little man answered, and was busy separating. The third son and the fat man followed him to the mahogany coffin. The three men looked at each other. The fat man raised the crowbar, groaned and inserted it into the coffin.

Zhang Erzhou prayed for a while. God has eyes. Give me some good ones, some with gold and some with gold. I retired early and stayed away from these rabbits. Then he vomited two big mouthfuls on his hand and stuffed the crowbar into the coffin seam in the other direction.

"Be smart and back off if something goes wrong. Third son, fuck that guy. Don't be distracted, okay?" Zhang Erzhou said

The other two sighed and swallowed, very nervous.

"Well, I'll count to one, two, three, just push, come, one ... two ..."

Zhang Erzhou was about to explode when he shouted out those three words. Suddenly a man behind him called, "Master! ! "

Zhang Erzhou got a fright, lost his breath and almost fell down. Looking back, he found Bing Ding, the youngest, with an anxious expression on his face. I don't know what happened.

"What?" Zhang Erzhou asked.

"I want to pee."

"Oh," Zhang Erzhou looked at the fat man and the third son and waved feebly. "Go out to pee."

"Oh," the one they called bean turned and climbed into the thief's hole.

Zhang Erzhou took a deep breath and blinked at the fat man and his third son. The three men returned to their respective positions and tied their positions. Just as they were about to shout 123 again, a voice whispered, "Master!" "

Zhang Erzhou suddenly felt a surge of murder, cursed and turned to ask, "What's the matter?" ! ! "

"Miss Wang, there is something wrong with the master. He stood in the corner from the beginning, looking at the murals, shaking all over. I like it! Do you want to see it? "

Zhang Erzhou turned to look, and sure enough, the female apprentice named Wang Pockmarked was standing in the corner, shivering strangely, as if she were still reading something.

Several people stopped to look at Wang Pockmarked. Under the flashing of flashlight, the shadow of hemp seed keeps changing its shape, which is very strange.

"Wang Mazi?" Zhang Erzhou let out a cry, at the same time, the dagger has become his hand. Dangerous things have never happened in recent years. He is not flustered, but it is not easy to meet such a good fat bucket, and he is unhappy when something happens.

Asako didn't answer, as if she didn't hear.

A few people are afraid. Zhang Erzhou waved his hand and told them not to be nervous. He crept up to Pockmarked Wang's back and came to a place four or five meters away. He suddenly felt something was wrong. He put the dagger in his waist and put it on in a few steps. This just slapped Wang Pockmarked. At the same time, I tore off an earphone from my ear and swore: "I am your grandfather!" " ! How many times have I told you, don't listen to mp3 when playing backwards! "

After half a day's education, Zhang Erzhou finally put down the fire pressure and felt a little tired. How to take an apprentice alone is really a fucking resentment.

This surprised a turn, he returned to the coffin, dumped them, and couldn't lift his strength, so he had to light a cigarette and catch his breath to see what happened to the others. However, I saw several young people who didn't know how to respond. They all stood there like zombies. Zhang Erzhou was angry again and scolded, "What are you doing?" Didn't I tell you to move things? What are you doing here? Don't want to get rich? "

"Master, there is nothing in the ear room. It is empty. Go and see for yourself. " An apprentice named Phoenix said.

"Bullshit, empty?"

"Really, I don't lie to you, both are empty, nothing. Have we cut someone off? "

"Bah, don't talk nonsense, this tomb is well sealed." Zhang Erzhou held a cigarette and waved. A group of people followed him into the left ear room.

About four square meters. It's empty. There's really nothing.

He thought, it is strange that there are no funerary objects, only the tombs of the Tang Dynasty, so they will not rot.

"Yes, master, it's really nothing." Phoenix Tantan hand said.

Zhang Erzhou gave him a hand and left him alone. He looked everywhere, but there was no interlayer on the wall. He frowned and ran to the right ear room. The place is symmetrical to the left, and there is nothing. The only difference is that there is a top cover on the ground. I don't know what that is.

Zhang Erzhou pinched it, and the soil was soft. It turns into powder at the touch. When you put it in your mouth, it has no taste.

"Master, what do you think is going on?" The third son couldn't help asking him.

Zhang Erzhou holding his nose said strange. I really haven't met him, and it's not easy to expose him to his disciples. He said: "It's nothing strange. It's this person who repaired the tomb. When he repaired the tomb, his family was better off, but when he died, he was already poor, so he buried it hastily and didn't put anything." This teaches us to be far-sighted and not short-sighted, you know? "

"ah? Isn't this another bad deal? Did you have fun? " Everyone was in an uproar.

"Shit, don't worry, isn't there a coffin?" Zhang Erzhou was too depressed to show it, so he had to pretend that he didn't care. "You little undead, don't bother me, open the coffin and let's go!"

A group of people retreated to the edge of the coffin, and the three people carrying the coffin stood back to their positions. After a pause, Zhang Erzhou said, God bless, this job is counting on this wave. How to give me some money to eat? I waved and told the onlookers to back off, and then gave the fat man a wink. Two people pressed down at the same time, the coffin board popped up and turned over.

Zhang Erzhou saw his one eye, wondering whether to look at the body like that first, or the rotten quilt, or a layer of funerary objects, and saw nothing at a glance.

The coffin is empty. And ridiculously empty. There is nothing in it. Clean as a new one.

Zhang Erzhou froze, one breath gushed from his chest, almost vomiting blood. He clung to the edge of the coffin to prevent himself from falling. But the man still fell, and Phoenix and Bean Nail immediately held him and knocked on his back.

What happened? How come even the coffin is empty, so empty? Is it really embarrassing?

It doesn't make sense. There is no loophole in this letter. I am an old hand. I can't be wrong about such a low-level thing.

Several small ones leaned in and looked at the coffin, but they were afraid to speak. There are several bold sighs: how empty.

Fat comfort way "teacher, you also don't feel sad, this family may be too poor, finally poor really can't, sell the body to others for autopsy. We are unlucky, and there will be opportunities in the future. "

"Yes, master, don't be sad."

Zhang Erzhou wry smile, with a wave, said don't want to listen to.

"Hey, look, there is a letter in the coffin." Bean nail suddenly cried.

"Where?" Zhang Erzhou jumped up and looked into the coffin. Suddenly, a shadow in the coffin was really an old envelope.

The fat man wanted to get it, and Zhang Erzhou grabbed him: "Don't move, the paper is too old, and it will turn into powder when touched."

"But, master, this is an airmail envelope. You see, it is open horizontally. " The fat man said

"ah!" Zhang Erzhou's forehead muscles are bursting. When he took out the envelope, he found it was an airmail envelope made of copper paper, which read: The sender has read it.

He was at a loss about it and said it was a joke. He rushed to open it. When he saw it, he suddenly thought of it in his chest, almost turning black at the moment.

The first line of the letter:

# # Tianbao fourteen years, An Lushan rebelled against john young in our time, which lasted for a long time, but the people didn't know how to fight. The Sixth Army Suwei is an ordinary villain, so he can't suffer from armor. There is chaos in the world, so many people set up graves, and Yu Xiu set up a grave in the ear room. If there is a grave, he should know the repair of the world and turn back as soon as possible. -Wei Ji, an ancient doctor in China.

The second paragraph of the letter:

# # In the first year of Xianping, Zhang Yi, a corps commander in Faqiu, Shanxi Province, was an old man of Wei. He wanted to hit the world without knowing it, but he didn't make a fuss and played rough. What is the purpose of repairing it?

Then:

# # Xuande for three years, Liyang scholar Wang explored the tomb. The world's scribes are bitter, and eunuchs are in power. When they are in power, they should repair the books in the coffin to remember.

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# # In the 11th year of Kangxi, Li Wenjin, a blacksmith in Liyang, won the middle of the tomb, and Li Jue was Ding Bai, so he got two or three words to remember it, so as to keep his name.

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# # In the 21st year of the Republic of China, the monks of Fatuo Temple in Liyang robbed tombs in the air for more than ten years, and then entered an empty net. In the civil war in Central China, Buddhism was clean. They want to relive the old night, and it is providence to enter this grave. From then on, I have nothing to ask for from the Buddha.

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# # 1982, * * you * *, you fill the pit so well every time you go out. To put it mildly, * * * is not just bad luck, you also want others to be caught. Fuck.-Changsha anonymous.

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# # 95, * * *, a white busy, later will meet your graves, I will show you. Wang Kaixuan

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# # Ass-fucking ass, you don't remind me if you are rude.

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# # I took stationery as a souvenir, put it on good paper, and continue below. I will come back to see it regularly.

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# # In 2006, the one upstairs was unkind. Please return the original. —— Hangzhou Wu Xie

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# # The landlord is a pig, and the appraisal is completed-Luoyang Zhang Erzhou, (the third son, Phoenix, Wang Pockmarked, Bean Nail, Fat Man, treading on thin ice)