Lines from Yun-peng Yue's Be a Rich Man

Be a Rich Man is a classic in Yun-peng Yue's cross talk. The following are the script lines of Yun-peng Yue's Being a Rich Man, which I compiled for your reference only. Welcome to reading.

Let me introduce my partner. Mr. Sun, his name is Sun Yue. He has been in poor health recently.

I'm sick.

I have leg cancer. You said a person was ill.

B: Hey, hey, hey, what is leg cancer?

A: It's leg inflammation.

My leg is uncomfortable.

A: The doctor advised him to amputate from below the eyebrows, but he didn't agree.

B: Wait a minute. Amputation below the eyebrows is called craniotomy.

A: I'm sick anyway.

I haven't heard of it. There is something wrong with your leg. Open your head.

A: Just start. What's wrong with spreading your legs?

This is outrageous.

A: Anyway, I'm not particularly good, but we'll try our best to give you a performance. Teacher Sun

Your teacher

A: I speak cross talk very well. I like cross talk since I was a child.

B: primary school students.

A: I started studying at the age of four or five, and then I joined the work after I graduated from primary school.

B: Wait, I have been working since I graduated from primary school.

hum

B: How old am I after primary school?

A: 23

B: Oh, my youth.

A: You married the head teacher in the fourth grade.

Go and play

is that true

Really? number

A: It caused a sensation in Jilin.

B: Hey, hey, hey, I haven't heard of it.

A: What's the matter?

B: Graduated from high school.

Oh, after I graduated from high school, I started working.

B: Right.

Be an animal in Beijing Zoo.

B: Right.

You mean this man, how brave he is.

Wait, are you making an animal? livestock farming

A: just keep animals.

B: what do you mean, even if?

All right, you keep animals.

B: Right, right, right.

A: Raising elephants. I have kept elephants for ten years.

B: Ten years.

Elephants are getting thinner and thinner. He's ... . You know!

What do I know? This is just my head feed.

A: I just admitted it today

B: Who admitted it? There is no such thing.

A: Anyway, we later had a cross talk.

B: Hey, don't talk nonsense.

A: A friend said, Do you make money by crosstalk?

Really?

A: Yes, hehe.

Oh, you are so direct.

A: We just want to make money, but he is not.

B: I'm not

My family has money.

B: A little at home.

A: He is a rich second generation.

Me?

is that true

B: Are all the rich second generation in your family just talking?

A: He is a rich second generation.

That's disgusting

A: He is a rich second generation.

B: One or one?

A: He is a rich second generation. What is rich second generation?

Tell me.

His brother is very rich. It's called rich second generation.

B: Wait a minute. Your families are equal.

A: Who?

My father is rich.

His father is very rich, and his father is the boss of Jiangqiao West.

B: Why is there Qiao Jiangxi?

A: Joe Jiangxi's boss, recently he got a girl named big H.

B: Stop talking nonsense.

A: Really, Big H has a Honda face. Big h? Big H has a sister named little H.

A modern face.

A: Modern, modern. That's oblique.

B: I'm coming, little H.

A: Little H has money anyway. This man, after he has money, just buys a house and a car.

B: What about you poor people?

A: He is no exception.

Me too.

Did you buy a house?

B: Yes.

A: I bought a house in Beijing and a big house in the Second Ring Road.

B: Oh, rich.

I bought an apartment with nine bedrooms.

Oh, the villa in the second ring road.

I want to kill you, you know? Nine bedrooms, all on the first floor, nine bedrooms, nine bathrooms and no kitchen. Rich.

B: Just a moment,

A: Rich second generation.

B: Wait, Jiuju is on the first floor, Jiuju, Jiuwei, no kitchen. I wrapped a floor of my home.

A: I said, did you pack a floor?

B: Nonsense, there are nine rooms on the first floor, five rooms here and four rooms here, leaving one room as a staircase.

A: You see how familiar he is, that is, the exterior wall of your house is yellow.

Our house number is still blue.

A: I feel at home.

B: Just feel at home.

A: Even if it is, it is rich. I bought an apartment with nine bedrooms and nine halls. I have nine bedrooms. Can I marry nine daughters-in-law?

This is a beautiful wish.

A: Check online, no way.

You are a fool. Still need to check online. Just asking.

A: What should I do?

Ask someone.

A: You are so stupid. You don't have to ask

B: Oh, by the way, don't ask.

A: I've been asking for years, and it's not good at all. He wants to have his own wife.

B: Hope.

A: Good wishes. I finally came up with a good idea.

What idea?

Answer: The biggest house is about wives, the remaining seven rooms are about concubines, and the last room is about ladies. What a beautiful wish.

hum

A: On the first night, I took my wife to the first room to sleep.

Well, accommodation?

A: The next night, I took my daughter-in-law to sleep in my concubine room, and the last night.

B: Hey, hey, no, no, the last room. Which room is for guests?

Then who will play the lady?

B: Then whoever comes to see me and is alive will play it.

Well, I learned from you.

Well, you can't follow me.

All right, baby, I'll let you go. Just say, best wishes, this is buying a house.

B: Rich.

Did you buy a car?

B: Yes.

A: I bought a nine-handed Alto.

B: This rich man is a real bitch.

A: the license plate is green a.

This is from Qinghai.

A: The brand of Qing Dynasty.

B: You wait, you wait.

Ouch

Oh, what?

A: Why?

B: Were there any cars in the Qing Dynasty? There was a car in the Qing Dynasty, and Empress Cixi was able to catch up with Eight-Nation Alliance.

A: The G8 promoted Amin's.

B: Isn't this nonsense?

A: Anyway, it is a brand of Qing Dynasty.

B: Qinghai brand

A: OK, the brand in Qinghai will not work in a few days. Give it up.

You shouldn't buy it

A: Give it up and get a new car.

I think it sounds awkward. Is this a shoe or a car?

A: I changed my car and bought an Olympic ring.

B: Wait a minute.

Oh, the Olympic circle

B: Wait a minute.

Oh, why do you keep pushing me?

What are you so beautiful about here? Ouch!

A: I draw a circle to curse you and fart to kill you. Isn't this popular now? Ouch!

B: ok, explain to me what the Olympic circle is.

A: That's right. Audi bell.

B: Hey, hey, hey, that's the Audi Fourth Ring Road.

A: Yes, four circles are Audi and five circles are Olympics.

Who asked you?

A: Audi A8,

B: nice car.

A: Dear friends, who can afford it?

B: Most people can't afford it.

Answer: Audi A8, eight cylinders, more than one million, driving this car, playing in the street, having fun, driving forward, there is a nine-handed Alto in front, he cursed the street, how can I sell it to you, grandson, hurry up.

Hey, enough.

Answer: Pay off the A card.

That's how I was fucking changed, isn't it?

A: I'm not happy anyway. Go ahead.

hum

It broke down and was stopped by the police.

Why did the police stop me?

You pressed the line.

Oh, that path on the road,

There are many lanes on this road. He ignored them and pressed them.

I don't know.

Comrade, pull over and put down the window.

Let's write it down.

A: No way. We have to listen to uncle police car.

be obident

A: shake it, it's not easy to shake it.

B: Am I Alto or Audi?

A: Audi.

B: It's Audi. Why are you still rolling the window?

A: I modified it myself.

B: Why am I so cheap?

A: I finally admitted that I was cheap.

B: Fuck you.

A: Shake it. It's hard to shake It's been shaking for three hours, and the police are almost crying.

hum

Comrade, can you hurry up?

B: That's very polite.

I'm warm here and cool here. Shake it. After four hours, he was finally searched thoroughly. He asked the police.

Ask the police.

Comrade, what can I do for you?

Why did you stop me?

A: I ... um ... Start (a disease)

I forgot

I forgot, I was confused by the high temperature.

B: This is a brain that has been heated for four hours.

A: Let's go. Yes, Deng ... (Lift the power window)

B: Hey, hey, I'll roll the window. It's electric up there.

hum

wow

Ouch

B: Isn't this honesty self-destructive?

Do you exercise? It's electric. Keep driving. It's broken if it's open or closed.

B: What's wrong?

A: The police stopped me again!

Why did you stop me again?

A: the thread is pressed again

B: There are too many lines.

Comrade, pull over and put down the window. (Put on another person in another tone) I just got up.

Who saw it?

Please, there is nothing we can do. We must listen. Shake it! It's hard to shake After shaking for three hours, the policeman cried this time.

I'm really fragile.

A: (crying) Comrade, let me tell you the truth. Comrade, can you hurry up? Comrade, let me tell you the truth. One minute before I stop you, I should get off work.

How do you know my ability?

A: I am also a bitch. Why do you think I stopped you? can you hurry up a little ?

wow

A: No.

Oh, oh, I have a point.

A: no, I'll take it! Shake it, four hours later, he asked the police, what do comrades want with me?

B: What's the matter?

A: (crying) Let's go. Thank you. Teng (power window), let's go.

B: Gee, this policeman has a bad brain.

A: Just left, the police talked, and now the driver can't afford to be injured.

B: There is nothing left! !

He was depressed. He continued to drive, but the car broke down again.

B: What's wrong?

I was stopped by the police again.

Why do police cars always stop me?

A: There is an urgent line.

B: How can you keep pressing the thread?

Comrade, pull over and put down the window.

B: Take it off again.

Answer: If you don't do it, just kill me.

B: Why?

I'm bored here, you know? It's been eight hours, and I haven't come home yet.

B: Who told you to modify it?

A: Why is it so annoying? Come on, put it away, or I'll shoot, okay

Oh, I also blew a shot.

A: There is a gun. You're starting to get scared. Shake it.

B: it's changed to hands.

A: After shaking for ten minutes, the police spoke.

What are you talking about?

A: Comrade, that's enough. There is a gap, as long as we can communicate.

That's smart.

hum

B: Have a taste.

A: No.

I must die. That won't do.

Stop shaking, it will kill you. You can open the car door.

B: Yes, those two policemen are so confused, don't you think?

A: Huh? No, it takes 18 hours to open the door. I newly modified it.

Where do I sit?

A: Don't talk nonsense. You pressed the line, you know? elegant

B: Is this stupid?

A: It's ironed. Did you get a look at him?

Yes, did you see it?

A: I didn't see it.

B: You didn't see it. You stopped me.

A: But two colleagues called me and said he remembered.

B: The traffic policeman can't afford to be injured.

A: It's you. I'm telling you, it's you I stopped eight Audi A8s. You're the only one who shook the glass, okay?

wow

A: It's you. Don't quibble. It is you. You tied the thread and fined 16 thousand.

B: Wait a minute. Press the line will be fined 16000.

hum

B: I pressed my prostate on me.

A: How to speak?

B: It's too expensive.

A: Is it sixteen thousand?

I haven't heard of it.

Do you know the new one? The new one this year is 16 thousand, you know? If you don't give it, I'll kill you! What's wrong with killing me? I won't give it. Besides, I pressed the line. Did I crush it for you? Take off your pants and let me see.

That makes sense.

A: No.

No I don't.

A: It's not crushed. Why did you stop me? All right, let's go.

B: They are all idiots!

A: Go ahead, it's open, it's broken and the police stopped it again.

B: What now?

A: This is a wine check.

B: Oh.

Comrade, pull over and put down the window. Ah, kill me.

B: I'm going crazy.

A: No way. I have to shake it. Okay, okay, there's a crack. Blow it. We are checking the wine. Please cooperate. Would you please blow it?

B: Blow it.

A: No.

Anyway, no

Baby, will you shoot me?

B: Pick any kind of wine.

A: Blow. Cut the crap. I'm waiting to get off work. Blow it once and the police will see it. Comrade, have you been drinking? Well, I've been shaking the cup for more than ten hours, and the wine hasn't passed yet?

B: I said, why do I always press the line? I'm drunk.

A: Comrade, I did, but I drank beer. Why bother? Beer is also wine.

B: That's right.

Really?

B: Yes.

Beer is also wine.

hum

A: Oh, according to you, that soy sauce is also oil, what is a horse, what is a cloud, and the Japanese are people. Step on the gas and walk away. The police are still talking to him.

What are you talking about?

A: Patriots, walk slowly.

hum

A: Yes, rich people can splurge.

Do you have money with you?

A: I just bought a house and a car and often go out to eat!

B: Nonsense, eat out even if you have no money!

A: Take my wife and concubines out to play.

B: Ah, ah, just one person.

A: Who dares to lead his daughter-in-law to that dung shop?

What about me and my wife dung beetles?

A: What do you mean? Don't beautify the image of dung beetles.

B: What do you mean by beautifying the image of dung beetles? Let's go to dinner and then go to a dung shop.

hum

B: How dare you eat?

A: Hotpot City

Oh, what else do you have?

You're disgusting.

B: Who has bad habits, Grand Hotel?

A: Hotel, it's different to call a waiter at a hotel.

B: Why is it different?

Waiter, come here. Come on.

B: Rich people have a temper.

Come on, I'm telling you, I killed myself.

B: Hey, I haven't heard of it. You have a big temper and cut yourself.

I was so angry that I scared the waiters. Oh, sir, this is your knife.

B: She hates me for not dying.

A: Cut the crap and order. The waiter said, oh, sir, here is our menu. What would you like to order?

order

A: fry one, audience friends. What do you mean, blow one up? It means that all the dishes on the whole menu are ready. The waiter was frightened. Oh, sir, why don't you kill yourself!

B: I have to die in the restaurant.

Why did you order so much? Do you care? I have money, my father is the boss of Jiangxi, and my bitch is big H.

B: (Stop it)

I am rich, sir. Can't finish eating and waste. Can you order something? Hehe, little girl, it's not that I don't order. I really can't read!

B: Are all the rich second generation illiterate now?

Oh, you can't read. There are pictures on it. According to the picture, I will write it for you! All right, all right.

What are you happy about?

Waiter, all your dishes are very cheap.

What do you mean by cheap?

A: It's all three digits.

B: Oh, 100 is over.

A: Stick to four digits.

B: Thousands.

A: Do you have any expensive dishes? Sir, there are expensive dishes in the back, and there are some in the back. I look scared, don't I?

B: Yes.

This is good. This is eight figures. I like this dish.

B: It's too expensive.

Sir, we don't have this dish. Why not? Why not? Sir, this is our reservation number! ! !

Hello. . . . . . .