I want to feed you.

This is a story of a boy begging without any skills and pursuits.

Once upon a time, there was a boy who had no skills at all. He heard that begging was very profitable and began to beg.

The first day:

I heard that begging is very profitable recently, with a monthly income of over 10,000 yuan. My job is very ordinary, and I get only a little salary every day when I am tired as a dog. I have a girlfriend. I want to give her a good life. It doesn't matter if I suffer a little.

It is said that there are many people in Area A, where many people beg for food and go the next day. I deliberately dressed in rags, cut holes in my clothes, and grabbed a handful of dirt in the garden and wiped it on my face. Finally, I went to area A happily.

I also met an acquaintance, Xiaohu Li, who just resigned from the company last month.

Xiaohu Li is no longer a tiger. He is old and young. The son is hungry, the wife has no job, and the family spends a lot of money. Xiaohu Li resigned because of the salary problem in the company.

I don't know him very well. I never knew what he was doing when he resigned. It turned out that he also joined the begging team.

Say hello to him quickly, without embarrassment, and speak frankly.

It turns out that begging has so many doorways.

In the end, although it didn't cost much, it was the first day after all. I'm still happy to have income.

the next day

There are many people begging together. As a newcomer in this industry, he has no experience and will just sit there stupidly.

Today, Xiaohu Li and I got together to beg again and talked about mountains and mountains all over the world.

So this colleague is so interesting. In the past, everyone in the company was doing their own work, lifeless and uninteresting.

In this case, begging is really a wise choice.

But in the end, there was one more head in Xiaohu Li's bowl than me. Hey, he is an old hand. I'll keep cheering.

Finally, he gave me the extra half of the rice, which is really a good man.

Buy his son a good can of milk powder next time.

the third day

On the third day, as usual, I arrived on time in the morning, set the bowl and sat there.

Today's weather is good, basking in the sun is good for sterilization.

In the past, the office was boring for me. So many people are crowded together, inhaling all the carbon dioxide exhaled by others. I don't know who farted again, spreading it around, holding my breath and looking around. Everyone covers their nose and mouth, their faces are democratic, and no one can see anything.

The object made beans that day, and my stomach was bad, so I refused to eat them. Seeing how much she wanted me to praise her cooking, I ate all the beans.

On the way to work, I feel that my stomach has been making trouble, and I have been holding it in the subway. I entered the company, sat in front of the computer and began to work.

I've been holding it all morning. I can't hold it any longer. I really feel uncomfortable, and I want to go to the toilet to release it. It happened that the leader came to see it again.

At this time, going to the toilet will be taught: "Some employees just love to be lazy. They will go to the toilet to get water for a while and stay out for a long time. Don't think I don't know what you are doing in there. Next time I play games and smoke, I will be fined 100. You dare to dawdle? "

I don't want to be deducted 100 yuan. I can buy vegetables as much as 100 yuan. I have eaten for several days.

As a result, the devil didn't leave that day. Besides, where is it? I'm anxious to scold my mother.

It happened that the leader looked at me with a gloomy face and asked me.

"Why, what's the matter with you? Have you worked for a long time? "

I was about to open my mouth to answer, but I couldn't hold my breath. It was still a fart.

Who said "fart doesn't stink, fart doesn't ring"!

Now everyone knows I farted. Maybe the fart before is also on my head. This is the first time I fart in public!

The leader turned and walked away with his face covered.

I was so anxious that I grabbed the leader's hand and hurriedly explained, "I really didn't mean to lead." Today, my girlfriend made beans and insisted that I eat them. I really didn't mean to fart to you! "

The leader stopped, turned and said something.

In desperation, I broke my fart again.

The leader was really anxious and stormed back to the office.

Everyone in the office is snickering.

Sitting in a chair, I was sulking for a long time. You can't blame me for farting, and I didn't take the initiative to eat beans. The fart of the past can't be blamed on me. Will the leader be angry and deduct my salary? Who put it before, and let me take the blame.

The angrier I am, the worse I feel. Since you all think I let it go, I will let it go aboveboard.

One at a time, and you can't let it out at the back. I also tried to suppress a few of my jokes for you. I put it, and I've put enough for today!

Day four five six seven

Beggars have rules. Draw the land as the boundary and don't cross the border. Even if no one can prove that this is his territory.

Who can give the beggar a certificate? number

These days are not smooth at all. I just arrived the other day, and no one noticed me. These days, the old people in this area are eyeing me, blaming me for stealing their business.

Later, when I moved to bridge opening, I was excluded.

Finally found a place and was caught by the city management. I wrote a letter of guarantee and kept it locked up for a long time before I was released.

It turns out that begging is so difficult that no one can afford this bowl of rice. I'd better do something else

By the way, everyone has been buying drinks outside recently. There should be many empty bottles in the trash can.

Ten cents for a large bottle and ten cents for two small bottles.

Ten is one and a hundred is ten. One thousand is one hundred dollars.

One hour and sixty minutes, one hundred. That is ten dollars.

Working eight hours a day is a steady eighty dollars.

Do something else. Here's a hundred dollars.

More rush hours, weekends, especially hot and crowded, that's terrible.

At this thought, my unhappy heart became happy after being excluded.

If God closes a door for you, he will still open a window for you. Haha, God won't kill me.

Eighth day

Unexpectedly, Xiaohu Li, who was begging at home, also came to pick up the bottle.

To be continued.

Even if one day, I can't feed myself, I will feed you if I beg.