Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Ask for the dialogue between Jiang Wen's "honest official" and Qi Jing in "The Big House Gate", thank you!
Ask for the dialogue between Jiang Wen's "honest official" and Qi Jing in "The Big House Gate", thank you!
Jiang: Is this white master here to investigate the Sun family case? -Cut to the chase, which shows that you are prepared for this case.
Bai: That's right. Please pay more attention. -Start with him first. Keep a low profile. It's convenient to talk below.
Jiang: Hissing, I heard that Lord Lu of the government house is related to you? -First, find out each other's background. There are many hills in officialdom, so it is dangerous to reach out.
Bai: Lord Lu is my cousin's father-in-law. -prepare two hands, first light a stick and give the other party a hint: don't hit hard. ..
Jiang: Oh. -I saw the stick, and I was a little nervous.
Bai: Ah. -We came prepared. Don't take me for Kai Zi, the lion will talk. ..
Jiang: Oh, I see. -Depression. I'm afraid I can't get the money this time. I think I will "greet" the family of the prefect. ....
Bai: Hey hey. -flirt with each other first.
Jiang: Then why don't you just ask Lord Lu to take a message? Are you still running alone? -superficial communication can't be too deep. Talk about conventional speech. Put a hook out and see if we can get on the road. Although the prefect is a superior, he has his own territory, and crossing the border is a bad rule. ) ....
Bai: Oh, my Lord, I can tell you that. Cut to the chase, which shows that you are a frank person.
Jiang: Huh? Hey? There is another play. ..
Bai: I really didn't mention it to them. I just came to see you. -nonsense, how can you not say hello to the backer in advance? It just means you're on your way. ...
Jiang: Oh. -Hide: Pigeons are flying back? ...
Bai: Relatives belong to relatives, and business belongs to business. I can't let this relative disturb your official business, can I? -That's bullshit again. Tell each other that we know the rules ... if you are on the road, there are radishes, too. ...
Jiang: Is it better to be in charge now than now? -Have a chance! !
Bai: Ah, I can't miss this opportunity to honor you. -Once in a lifetime, let's make friends.
Ginger: Ha ha ha ha. ............................................................................................................................................................................
Bai: Hehehehehehehehehe. ..........................................................................................................................................................................
Jiang: Oh, this relative of yours is really true. -hand out first, starting from the prefect's adult. Interesting and cunning: your relative is not that good, so why did you use him to press me? Think for yourself. (It means that it is not a fuel-efficient lamp that our family can sit in this position) _
Bai: What's the matter? -just cooperate with each other and do a little test.
Jiang: Last month, Lord Lu gave me 65,438+20,000 taels of silver. -Absolutely! ! Let's talk about business first It's safer to take a test. If you hit the road, I'll pay. In case you say so, I'm also getting a raise for official business. Give you a receipt at most, and leave nothing behind.
Bai: Ah. -Work together again.
Jiang: His old man doesn't want to think about it either. I am here at Qingshui yamen. Nonsense.
Bai: Your honor, please stay out of this matter. I really care about this matter for you. Isn't it 65438+ two more pieces of silver? I'll do it for you. -Frank, let's hit the road. ..
Jiang: Yo.
Bai: Don't worry.
Jiang: Then I'm counting on you. -Actually, it's still a joke. 10000 salary is not a large sum. Seeing each other on the road was a little relieved. ..
Bai: Yes, it's a piece of cake.
Jiang: Oh ~ Sometimes, um ~, yes, it's really difficult to be an official. -after the small test, I still don't feel at ease. Try again.
Bai: Yes.
Jiang: It's really not as good as you businessmen.
Bai: Yo, you say. ...
Jiang: Let's say last year.
Bai: Ah.
Jiang: This is an imperial envoy returning to Jinan. -Start with official business, and don't leave anything behind. Also remind each other where the water is on their side. ...
Bai: That's right.
Jiang: Guess what? Me, hey ...
Bai: What?
Jiang: I am as poor as a church mouse.
Bai: Huh?
Jiang: Yes, when I was alive, I owed more than thirty thousand taels of silver. I can't plug this hole up to now. -complaining, very interesting. ...
Bai: (clapping hands) Really? -Cooperation is a little stiff. But the advantage of formality is to tell the other person that you are on your way. Don't test me ... _
Jiang: Hmm. ...
Bai: Yes, you adults are so poor?
Jiang: Look. ...
Bai: I'm not telling anyone. Who will believe it? -this sentence is more obvious. Seemingly respectful, but actually a little impatient: damn, it's creaking. Will you be on your way? Have some dry goods .. If you cooperate with each other too much in words, it will give them the illusion that we are weak. ...
Jiang: No one believes it. ...
Bai: (holding out his hand) I'll get the iou. I will take care of it. Frank! ! If you want to make friends with senior officials, you must not give money to a bitch. ..
Jiang: That won't do. ...
Bai: Yes, look, look, look. ...
Jiang: That won't do. ...
Bai: Look at you, look at you, um, you. ...
Jiang: No, no. ...
Bai: Look. ...........................................................................................................................................................................
Ginger: I'm, I'm poor, but I'm ambitious ... Well, this is the first time I've met you. How can I make you make money?
Bai: Well, once raw, twice cooked. You said I should honor you at ordinary times. Where can he find me? -It bothers me: the money is for you. Don't tell us this is business ... how much is it? Say the number Shall we make friends? ..
Isn't it? Oh, right?
Jiang: a friend of a gentleman, a friend of a gentleman. -This profiteer is interesting. He can make it ... _
Bai: Oh.
Cingil: Ha ha ha. It is as light as water. Talking about money is boring.
Bai: Right, right, right, right. ...
Jiang: I am poor and ambitious. I am not afraid of poverty. What am I afraid of?
Bai: Huh?
Jiang: I'm afraid I can't do this filial piety. It's ............................. dry goods. At this time, I feel the impatience of the other party and can't talk about business in circles any more. ....
Bai: Why? -see you on the road, and cooperate thoroughly. The following is improvisation ... haha.
Jiang: Alas, my old mother is over seventy years old.
Bai: Ah.
Ginger: If nothing else, try this glue from your home. How old and expensive do you think your family is? Huh?
Bai: Hmm.
Jiang: I told the old lady, can't I not eat?
Bai: Eat and eat. We must eat. We don't eat anything. We must eat.
Ginger: Eat?
Bai: Ah. Guess what, the old lady has been sticky since today? I'm all wrapped up. Let the old lady eat him and live a long life. Hmm, how interesting ...
Jiang: Ha ha ha, sorry, sorry.
Bai: Well, what are you? ...
Jiang: Look at my wife. She can't think of anything this year. She must repair her ancestral grave. You don't have a family, so why build a ancestral grave? Huh?
Bai: I'm going to repair the ancestral grave.
Jiang: Hey, don't talk about it.
Bai: Ah.
Jiang: You mean my son? ...
Bai: Huh?
Jiang: Ah, gambling is easy.
Bai: hmm, hmm? !
Jiang: You lost more than thirty thousand taels of silver in one night. Hissing, hey, I said you. ...
Bai: Hello, which casino is this?
Jiang: Sanjiang Inn.
Bai: Don't worry, I'll go. That boss and I are good friends.
Jiang: Oh.
Bai: Yes, don't worry, isn't this about the big nephew? -"Big Nephew", climb the pole at once, haha.
Jiang: Yeah.
Bai: I have the final say.
Jiang: Wait,
Bai: Hmm.
Jiang: And.
Bai: What?
Jiang: Who else is in our family? -_ looks a little carried away, but in fact I'm sober. I have tested almost all the scenes. At this time, I was completely relieved.
Bai: (groping around) You, are you asking me? How do I know who else? -I'm a little surprised. We are all very cooperative. What do you want? Stop playing, man ..
Jiang: Ha ha ha ha ... Listen, listen, listen, the more you talk, the worse it gets.
Bai: No, no, no, no ... I sincerely salute you. Who's to say? You are an honest official, and there is no corruption, right? You can't give me face. You have no money to spend. I feel bad in my heart I feel bad, and you? ...
Jiang: It's like I don't have enough clothes to wear. Actually, I'm used to it. Besides, I am an official, right? You ~ you have to be clean, and you can't let people poke our spine ... (strike the table) Then come on, 202,000 silver, and I'll do it for you. -I finally got an offer. Two hundred and twenty-two thousand pieces of silver is not a small sum, which shows that we have done enough investigation and study beforehand and know the value of this case. We are knowledgeable! ! ...
Bai: Your Excellency,
Jiang: Huh?
Bai: Don't worry.
Jiang: What's the matter? -I thought they made a counter-offer. I'm a little nervous. ..
Bai: No, it won't hurt to fight a lawsuit for a year or so, ..........................................................................................................................................................!
Jiang: What do you mean?
Bai: You see, if the Sun family wants to win this lawsuit, they still have to honor you, and the third-class officials all need some scattered money. -awesome, but also conveniently gave each other a way to make money, fun enough? Awesome! !
Jiang: Hehehehehe, boy, I'm an official, it's your turn. This sentence seems more sincere ... We are all smart people and can make friends. _
Bai: You are laughing at me. You're laughing at me. Hey.
Jiang: OK, I'll take someone tomorrow.
Bai: I'll send you money tomorrow.
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